Hi Lynn,sounds like you are having a really tough time with this, what has been posted is good advice, but I'm surprised no one has mentioned what the first Church council in Acts 15 decided was the correct behavior for Christians, so maybe this will help you.
James speaking;
Therefore my judgment is that we do not trouble those who have turned to God from among the nations, but that we write to them that they should abstain from pollutions of idols, and from fornication, and from things strangled, and from blood. Act 15:19, 20
Seems pretty clear to me, James was speaking by the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, ...sex before marriage is taboo! Also, Scripture says fornicators will be judged Heb 13:4, ...and, going back to the first marriage in the Garden, Adam and Eve were told to cleave to one another, to become one flesh through the means of the act of sex, ...what happens at orgasm is seven hormones are produced and released in our bodies that cause us to love our mate, i.e. cleaving, this cleaving only happens when there is an commitment of and in the heart of the two people involved, however, if there isn't a commitment, the seven hormones are still produced and released, but they act in a negative way and cause the two fornicators to eventually hate one another, which we find an illustration of this principle in the story of Amnon and Tamar, 2 Sam 13, you remember, Amnon was so love sick for Tamar he couldn't eat, then after he did his dastardly deed we are told his hatred for her was stronger than the love he had had for her.
I hope you are beginning to see that this guy only wants to destroy you and himself, if he hasn't done so to himself already, remember, love is patience, a couple in love can wait.
Now it wouldn't be very brotherly or loving of me to just tell you what not to do, so please have patience with me while I try to briefly explain what you can do.
God is a triune Being, three Persons in One, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, man was created in the image of God in that we are made of three distinct parts, body, soul and spirit, with our body we relate to the physical, our souls are our emotions and heart, our spirit is where we talk to and commune with God, so, going back to the first marriage in the Garden, when Adam saw Eve he exclaimed, bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh, ...which means, she is the perfect mate for me! That means there was a physical attraction, a romantic spark, there was communication between two souls, they were best friends, they loved to hang together and the were on the same wave length, so to speak, with their desires towards pleasing God and worshiping God, ...that is the model for us today, the Adam Father has prepared for you will fit perfectly with your desires in these three categories and yours with his, it will just click and you will both know it, ...one out of the three the marriage is doomed, two out of the three will work, but it will be a struggle with lots of work, three out of three, ...a marriage made in heaven
If we glean some more from this love story we will see that Father knew what Adam needed before Adam realized it Gen 2:18, it was only after Adam had named all of the animals Mr & Mrs that he realized he was alone, that teaches us that Father puts the desire in us, awakens us to our need before we even think about it, so, if you or anyone is desiring a mate it's because Father has placed that desire in our hearts, ...so just imagine what would of happened if Adam would of chosen his mate himself, probably ended up with a monkey or gorilla (which is what will happen to you dear one if you continue with this relationship, ...you'll be living with a gorilla), so what did Father do to Adam so that he could receive, meet his mate? Put him to sleep, and that's my advice to you dear one, go to sleep, ...stop looking, stop searching, have faith in God, the just live by faith, ...in the mean time become active in a Bible teaching church, continuing to grow daily in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ and you will find one day Father will waken you and there will be your Adam standing in front of you (I speak from experience, this is exactly how Father worked in my life and then moved me 1/4 way around the world to present my Eve to me), ...every good and perfect gift comes from above.
There you go, I hope this helps, ...remember and appropriate this into your life,
For now there are faith, hope, and love. But of these three, the greatest is love. 1Co 13:13
Faith that our past has been erased, hope knowing Father is preparing the future for us, which frees us to love and serve Him with all of our heart, soul, mind and body, with this Truth appropriated into your heart you can sleep peacefully while Father is knocking off the rough edges of your Adam before He presents him to you.
In His Love,
Gene