So .. you don't feel like talking to God directly .. I was thinking of that story in 2nd Samuel Chapter 12 where the King committed the only sin in his kingship that was held against him in the Histories "in his dealings with Uriah the Hittite" now i was looking at this .. David didn't go to God about it .. God had to send a prophet to him (Nathan) . and then pronounced that what David did in secret .. would be displayed openly . which was fulfilled when his son Absalom incited civil war . My advice to you today .. is to be real with God . He'd much rather speak to you personally .. and about stuff that's really not working in your favour to the spiritual ears in your heart .. than have to send someone to deliver the news to your carnal ears on your head .. and display what you did in the open . instead . when God is speaking .. listen . do not harden your hearts .