Envy v Empathy

Via dolarossa

Via dolarossa

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Comparing yourself to others is actually a good thing! By via Dolarossa

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When we compare ourself to others we can get jealous or envious and feel some kind of pain. It’s horrible. So many times I’ve been there. But God has a plan when you feel this way.

Because When you see people who makes you feel bad about yourself All you have to do is ask God in faith to change the lens your looking through.

Like, try this lens…
how would things be if you were them?
Ok, not so fast…..maybe you cannot possible imagine being them yet but you wouldn’t mind to experience what they are experiencing…. Because to you they seem happy and at ease and you want to be happy and at ease too.

But once you start to imagine experiencing what they are experiencing you may find yourself feeling very uncomfortable because you have these stupid fears and beliefs and uncomfortable feelings pop up….
enough to be able to stop you from really wanting those experiences in the first place or you may crave them sometimes but because you can’t get past your fears you log out from them.
We all have or are working with fears and thoughts. Things like:

“I’m not good enough” “He/she’s not good enough”
“They’re too good for me”

“I am weak” “I am a loser” they are weak or a looser”

I am unlovable” “No one likes me” or “they are unlovable and I don’t like them”

“I am bad” or “ they are bad”
“ I just can’t do it” they just can’t do it”

“I don’t deserve it” “I am worthless” “ they are worthless” etc…..


Yes, and those people you see who are having those good experiences you so desire, they either have them fears and feelings and thoughts too or did have those similar thoughts and feelings once. It’s just that they worked/ or are working through theirs. Maybe they have even reached their spiritual milestones and are further than you are in their walk.

So Once you have uncovered which belief is lurking beneath your consciousness , jealousy/ envy then turns to Inspiration and that’s when Gods power really can get to work in you to help you transform your mind( beliefs about yourself, others and the world) and then What happens is you then start to see the Power of God working in you to bring you closer to what you want.

So comparing yourself to others can really be the start of a good thing!

Amen.

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Thanks for reading and God Bless❤️
 
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Via dolarossa said:
Comparing yourself to others is actually a good thing! By via Dolarossa

——————————

When we compare ourself to others we can get jealous or envious and feel some kind of pain. It’s horrible. So many times I’ve been there. But God has a plan when you feel this way.

Because When you see people who makes you feel bad about yourself All you have to do is ask God in faith to change the lens your looking through.

Like, try this lens…
how would things be if you were them?
Ok, not so fast…..maybe you cannot possible imagine being them yet but you wouldn’t mind to experience what they are experiencing…. Because to you they seem happy and at ease and you want to be happy and at ease too.

But once you start to imagine experiencing what they are experiencing you may find yourself feeling very uncomfortable because you have these stupid fears and beliefs and uncomfortable feelings pop up….
enough to be able to stop you from really wanting those experiences in the first place or you may crave them sometimes but because you can’t get past your fears you log out from them.
We all have or are working with fears and thoughts. Things like:

“I’m not good enough” “He/she’s not good enough”
“They’re too good for me”

“I am weak” “I am a loser” they are weak or a looser”

I am unlovable” “No one likes me” or “they are unlovable and I don’t like them”

“I am bad” or “ they are bad”
“ I just can’t do it” they just can’t do it”

“I don’t deserve it” “I am worthless” “ they are worthless” etc…..


Yes, and those people you see who are having those good experiences you so desire, they either have them fears and feelings and thoughts too or did have those similar thoughts and feelings once. It’s just that they worked/ or are working through theirs. Maybe they have even reached their spiritual milestones and are further than you are in their walk.

So Once you have uncovered which belief is lurking beneath your consciousness , jealousy/ envy then turns to Inspiration and that’s when Gods power really can get to work in you to help you transform your mind( beliefs about yourself, others and the world) and then What happens is you then start to see the Power of God working in you to bring you closer to what you want.

So comparing yourself to others can really be the start of a good thing!

Amen.

—————————-


Thanks for reading and God Bless❤️
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Hello Via;

This is a good thread for topic. There is a lot to sink in so I'll chew on this before I post.

God bless you and thank you.
 
Galatians 6 touches on this:
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1 Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by some sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person back onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself.
2 Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.
3 If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.
4 Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well done, and you won’t need to compare yourself to anyone else.
5 For we are each responsible for our own conduct.
6 Those who are taught the word of God should provide for their teachers, sharing all good things with them.
7 Don’t be misled—you cannot mock the justice of God. You will always harvest what you plant.
8 Those who live only to satisfy their own sinful nature will harvest decay and death from that sinful nature. But those who live to please the Spirit will harvest everlasting life from the Spirit.
9 So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.
10 Therefore, whenever we have the opportunity, we should do good to everyone—especially to those in the family of faith.
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"You will always harvest what you plant." Or, "You will reap what you sow". Knowing this changes your mindset. Share each other's burdens. Help others when you can. Get ready for the harvest.
 
My friend told me she was jealous of her son, his girlfriend and grandaughter going on a trip to Raro.

I thought she should be happy for them, as they hadn't been before as a family. She'd already gone with me a few years ago and another time with her family.

But no she was jealous. Then she said she hoped they would 'get her' something from Raro.

I was like what, sunshine? sand? an air ticket?

I didn't know what else to say. What do you do when your friends get jealous of everything anyone else has that they don't have right now? I have noticed this friend seems always seems bit jealous of others and it has ruined some of her friendships with others before.

Kids do this too. They can't wait or take turns or realise what they already have.
 
Lanolin said:
My friend told me she was jealous of her son, his girlfriend and grandaughter going on a trip to Raro. I thought she should be happy for them, as they hadn't been before as a family. She'd already gone with me a few years ago and another time with her family. But no she was jealous. Then she said she hoped they would 'get her' something from Raro. I was like what, sunshine? sand? an air ticket? I didn't know what else to say. What do you do when your friends get jealous of everything anyone else has that they don't have right now? I have noticed this friend seems always seems bit jealous of others and it has ruined some of her friendships with others before. Kids do this too. They can't wait or take turns or realise what they already have.
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Hello Lanolin;

When you mentioned Raro, are you referring to Rarotonga?

When my friends admit to being jealous of others I ask them, "instead of being jealous why don't you be happy for them?" I don't know if you already said that to her. God has plenty of blessings for each of us and He never runs out.

Whether your friend is a Christian or not, jealousy is a sin and equates to idolatry. If your friend doesn't grasp this, then get out of God's way, pray for her and let Him work through her.

I know what it's like to be jealous of others, especially my family. My younger sister and her husband had a terrible accident years ago. They were awarded a settlement and bought a beautiful house. We were renting a one bedroom apartment and I envied them. A friend at work heard me vent and asked me, "Bob, instead of being jealous, why don't you be happy for her?" Besides, my brother in law has a scar above his eye for life. My friend actually ministered to me and God has blessed my wife and me abundantly through the years.

I hope this helps, sister.
 
What do you do when your friends get jealous of everything anyone else has that they don't have right now
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Thats exactly it, what do we do?

well I can only speak for myself but...

My feelings of jealousy or envy is a sign that i would also like what they have, although I am not called to steal them from others or make their lives miserable for it. That would be an enemy tactic. God gives, the devil steals. So Empathy must come first or the devil will steal my dreams and possibly others whilst he's at it.

Now, I can actually see why He hasn't personally given me the things I so desire yet. He does loves me I know that, because I am no longer guilty of past sins and Now He wants to see me joyful and not just in peace. I think He sees that I am not quite ready for my hearts desires yet... For me, personally I have to first prepare myself for them. No good just rushing in. kinda Like a good business that takes time to build so it has less chance to fail.

And as long as i pray about it, and ask Him to help me work through any obstacles, issues and feelings, and build me up and trust Him to lead me to where i would like to be, I can find some acceptance of the present moment just as it is, and rest in Him there, and be at peace knowing that He is working on my behalf. And so, with all that, a new perspective unveils itself, -what i so desire just hasn't manifested yet!.

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Empathy is being able to feel what another person us going through and understanding that feeling.

Envy is wanting what another person has and being prepared to try and get it. That is different than jealousy. Jealousy can hurt you but you are not about to take something away from someone. 9
 
Cosia said:
I know they call that jealousy, to me it is envy.

God said He is a jealous God, but God cannot sin..
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Envy and jealousy are similar but not the same.

Envy is what one person feels about another. For example, I may feel envious (desirous) of my friend's wealth or popularity.

Jealousy is what one person feels about themselves, specifically in regards to losing something. For example, I may be jealous of my status and fear that I will lose it over time.

When the Bible says that God is a jealous God, it is saying that God is protective of what he considers his own. For example, he is jealous of his image and thus graven images are forbidden. He is jealous of his chosen tribe thus is protective of the Jews and will not let them go (apostasy).
 
Well what I said was she could plan her own trip to Raro (or anywhere) with her own sister. She can save up for it, I do know she's been to a lot of places already so its not like she never gets to go anywhere...

A couple of days later my sister rang to say she was visiting from London and when she was over here I asked her was she planning on going out of Auckland, she said she wanted to do a road trip up north. So she's going to book and I get to go with her. hooray!

my travel plans don't always work out so I'm just lucky I do get the chance to go anywhere when I can. I don't expect when anyone goes anywhere exotic that they can take me! Or bring me back gifts. So I'm not sure where that comes from..my cousins this year are going to Hawaii on a cheer team tournament and then a week in LA and going to Disneyland. I'm not expecting that I go with them! I'm just happy for them.

Also I've already been to Hawaii (stopover, but I can say I've been to the airport!) so I can't say I'm jealous, although I've never been to Disneyland. I know it costs a lot of money to travel from NZ as we are so far away from everything.

I think if you did have the travel bug really badly it would be best to find a job in the travel industry and then get paid to do it!
 
I did suggest she could plan a trip of her own and decide where to go. I also said that don't wait for anyone else, if you really really want to go somewhere you just go on your own. I once did that, I saved up money and decided I wanted a cruise holiday and I would do it solo. So I did. I went for 2 weeks round NZ and Australia. I enjoyed it but I don't know that I would do it again. I would do something different! I don't know how people could be jealous of me doing that. If you really want to travel, you need to save up money to do so. Its expensive to have a place to stay and eat out all the time and you can't overstay your welcome at friends places who are hosting you.
 
LearningToLetGo said:
Envy and jealousy are similar but not the same.

Envy is what one person feels about another. For example, I may feel envious (desirous) of my friend's wealth or popularity.

Jealousy is what one person feels about themselves, specifically in regards to losing something. For example, I may be jealous of my status and fear that I will lose it over time.

When the Bible says that God is a jealous God, it is saying that God is protective of what he considers his own. For example, he is jealous of his image and thus graven images are forbidden. He is jealous of his chosen tribe thus is protective of the Jews and will not let them go (apostasy).
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I looked up jealous in my Oxford English dictionary, the 3rd definition says
3 very protective of your rights or possessions

the first says envious of someone else's achievements or advantages. 2 resentful of someone who you think is a sexual rival
 
Lanolin said:
I looked up jealous in my Oxford English dictionary, the 3rd definition says
3 very protective of your rights or possessions

the first says envious of someone else's achievements or advantages. 2 resentful of someone who you think is a sexual rival
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You'll notice that definition #2 also implies losing something. The rival may steal the person of one's desire away from them. In that sense it is essentially the same as #3.

It is true that oftentimes jealously is used as a synonym for envy (definition #1), but at its core jealously does imply a loss. That's the key takeaway.
 
So was my friend jealous or envious. I think she was envious because she hadn't actually lost anything. Or was she jealous of her son's girlfriend going instead of her. I don't know.
 
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