"Emo" culture

Discussion in 'Family and Parenting' started by Matt106, Sep 24, 2007.

  1. Hi Pamela, Yes I would back up what Boanerges said.
    Any culture that promotes (through whatever means) focusing on oneself or cutting or anything that causes harm to the individual isnt imo, good.
    You sould like a kind thoughtful young woman, and I believe you have lots to give, maybe if you could find a church or a fellowship that is Bible believing and Spirit filled you would be pleasently suprised at the fellowship and support you would get?
    You are right, in that, going to church doesnt make you closer to God or anything like that, I just believe it is an act of worship to go and meet with other like mindede people to worship God.
    Out of my giving, He blesses me and empowers me.
    I always think of an analogy someone said when I was a new Christian, a coal only stays hot as long as it is in the fire, if you take one piece out it is still coal, but it rapidly cools down!
    That is like us, we function better and fulfill what God has called us to do better, if we stick together.
     
  2. Yeah, well people in church mostly think different from what I think and I respect that but people tell me I'm wrong so I don't really share my thoughts, but THAT is a whole different topic.

    Cutting did NOT seperate me from the things I need. If you're referring to God (I think that's what you meant, Larry, tell me if I'm wrong), I would like to say that it actually brought me closer. I asked God why am I going through this, why is this my way of coping, why do I punish myself like this? After a while I was kinda forced to see a counseler, it never helped but when my parents found out, it did. I think God, one way or another, kinda made my dad see what I was doing and he confronted me with it and I never did it since.

    Still, being "emo" doesn't really mean you're promoting being depressed, I think. I think being depressed is nowhere near fun and I think NOBODY thinks it is. Not even emo's. I don't think they like being depressed. And let me tell you, most emo's aren't depressed. It's just their way of doing their hair, clothing and writing poetry that makes people say they're emo and depressed.

    Emo stands for emotional which "emo"-people tend to be. They write their feelings down on paper, mostly negative feelings because that's their way to cope with all of it. The cutting part, I don't know where it came from, but it's just stuck onto their ways of living and coping and I just think it's wrong because cutting isn't just for the emo's! Everyone can cut if you're sensitive for it. I just think it's a wrong statement to say that emo's tend to be more suicidal and self-harming, because I know so many people who're not emo and still have these thoughts.
     
  3. Pamela, I'm the OP for this thread. You raise good points. It's never suggested that all emos cut. It's certainly also true that not all "cutters" are emo. My original premise is that the messages of emo tend to be associated with the increase in cutting that myself and many of my colleagues have observed. Consider it a risk factor. Have you ever been around a large number of negative people for an extended period of time? Ever notice that if you're not paying attention, that the negative people can bring you down? I think most of us have. Consider the reverse as well. Cheerful and happy people can build us up! Even better, ever go to a good, spirit filled, worship service? You feel fantastic when you leave! Of course, the Lord is always able to lift us up! My point is that the people, media, messages, ideas that we allow ourselves to be exposed to can change our thinking. It doesn't strike as a lightning bolt, but it tends to be subtle and steady. It's not like you listen to one My Chemical Romance song and you turn into a "wrist cutting zombie." People can be subtly influenced without their knowledge. It's frankly the basis of advertising, brainwashing, and propaganda! We know it well. When we are aware of this possibility, we can take steps to avoid it. The key is to make choices about what you expose your self to. I know that's sometimes impossible, but even being aware of the possible effects of negative messages and thinking can keep negative influences at bay. I always tell the teens in my program to "watch what you put into your brains." I believe that emo music and "culture." Promote self injury, and a large number, but certainly not all people that listen to it, self injure. This takes me back to my teen years. I used to go to "under 21" dances at a local club. Every time, the DJ would play about a half hour of heavy metal. Without exception, there would be a fight when that music played! I'm not joking! Every single time! We'd have all eyes on the dance floor at the first note of a Motley Crue song! It was the big joke at these dances. Ironically, I thought much as you did at the time. I was really into heavy metal and I didn't get violent, nor did most of my friends. I really understand when you say that most self identified "emo" kids refute any link between the music and self injury. Just like myself and my friends refused to see links between heavy metal and violence, even though it erupted in front of us on a weekly basis. Most fans of "gansta" rap also refuse to acknowledge any links between their music and crime or violence, even thought this link is very well accepted. Hope this contributes to the discussion. By the way, self injury may or may not be a sin. I'm a therapist, not a theologian. If it is, the Lord will forgive. He always does, and he will always love you.
     
  4. Yeah, see, I understand where you're coming from, I understand what you're saying but do you really know what being emo actually is? I mean, emo's seem to be more depressed, but it's because they're sensitive, emotional and very closed-off from other people. They tend to keep their feelings with them and to not share their negative feelings with people. They just write them down, which is where the "emo-poems" come from.

    I think it's so wrong to ever link a certain group of people/certain music-genre to a certain "negativity" (by which I mean self-injury, suicides, crimes, violence etc) because it's only a small group of the listeners and also people who don't even listen/like the music tend to do all these things. I think it's rather judging. People like just judge people on appearence and choice of music and I'm kinda sick of it. I know people are concerned about the "emo-kids", but woosh, give them a break! There might be nothing wrong, they ARE normal people after all, they do have normal feelings like everybody and no, they're not all depressed. And let me tell you this: In a song of a so-called "emo-band" named Thrice, there is this part and I was told it was a quote of Jesus. it's "We're not alone, we feel an unseen love. We are sons and heirs of grace, we are children of a light that never dims and love that never dies." I don't know if it's true, but see, it's not only about dying an cuttig, it's also encouraging to continue to be strong, to just embrace life and love it to the fullest. For instance, the band you mentioned, My Chemical Romance is actually a very happy band without messages like that. There's just one line I can just think of on the top of my head that says "Lets cut our wrists like cheap coupons and say death was on sale today". But I mean, that's just one line and I don't know, I don't think it's really encouraging to actually grab a sharp object and go and cut your wrists.

    I know that spending time with negative people will bring you down, I do experience it too sometimes, and I do know it also goes for the other way around, but being emo doesn't mean you're always really negative. They don't really show emotion, that's why being happy and being sad looks like each other. They also do crazy things like me, just with different expressions on their faces.

    I just read this comment again and it sounds rather angry and offensive, but I'm very sorry for that, because I don't mean to. I just think this is a very interesting discussion and I really want to teach you (??) something about emo's and I want to see your point, but I also want you to see mine. Sorry for the angry tone.
     
  5. What does the bible have to say:


    Pro 20:11 Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
     
  6. Pamela, I'm not at all offended! I can never know what it is like to be "emo." Likely, you can't understand what it's like to be an almost 40 year old therapist! Not that you would-lol! I know many emo kids, there have been quite a few in my program in the last few years. i have had sessions with them. I have listened to them, read their journals and poetry (with their consent). I've spoke to their families, taken extensive histories of them. I come to know them quite well. I guess that's the best I can do. I tend to be positive in the respect that I believe that people can change their thinking and realize their God given potential. That sometimes annoys some of the kids because they tend to cling to irrational and overly negative thinking. Unfortunately, the Lord is a far better therapist than I, and I cannot share that at my work due to government regulation. In any examination of human behavior, we look at trends; what a large percentage of people in a certain group or situation do. It is impossible to predict what any single human will do in any situation. My entire premise is that since the advent of "emo," (I really hate that term, by the way.) there has been a sharp increase in self injurious behavior. The CDC has noted that there has been an increase in the suicide rate, when it had been dropping for nearly 20 years. The only big difference in teen culture right now is "emo." I was where you were about 20 years ago. People were blaming metal for suicide, drug use, and all of the other social ills of the time. Lawsuits were even filed. I was very adamant the entire time that there was no connection. My arguments at that time would have been identical to yours. I don't know if this clarifies things at all. I might have made them worse. I can only speak of what myself and my colleagues see. We're not trying to be judgmental, we're just going where the evidence leads. This does not have anything to do with the condition of anyone's soul. Only the Lord knows this. I can only observe and comment on behaviors and their possible causes. I used My Chemical Romance because they seem to be portrayed as the "stereotypical" emo band. I really know little of the music other than the lyrics. I can't stand to listen to it. It brings me down, and I watch what I put into my head.
     
  7. Hi Matt!

    Haha no, I don't know what it's like to be a 40-year-old therapist, but I will in 23 years, because I wanna become a psychologist! ;)

    But I do see your point, I do think that more cases of self injury are known with emo-kids than with other people. But do you really think that the music they/we listen to, can bring us to do certain things? Do you think that listening to "emo"-music brought me to harming myself? Because I never really had the idea that was happening, is it something that we're not conciouse of (sorry, don't know how to spell it:confused:)

    But isn't it also that now-a-days we're all more "depressed" because there's a whole lot more pressure on us? I think adults expect too much of us teenagers these days and I think that brings people to be more down than years back. Do you think that could also be a reason? Because, how would it all start, how do they come up with the idea of writing songs about cutting and suicide?
     
  8. A very good answer brother.
     
  9. Pamela, Just to respond: It's not just the music. It's the entire culture in which the music is just one part. There's the entire philosophy of death that surrounds emo. The poetry, the music, the fashion, the embracing of death and self injury is just a part of the over all subculture that is "emo." This is what I commonly see in my practice: Kids get to middle school age. They're looking for someway to identify and define themselves, that's what teens do. Some are attracted to "emo". Some of these kids may have some depression or other issues that make them susceptible to this. Other kids seem perfectly "normal" (another term I tend to hate), and then suddenly change. At any rate, these kids get into the music, and get the messages, they go online and see websites, and get the messages, they read the messages in all forms of media, they get together with their friends, and get the messages. They immerse themselves in a subculture that openly discusses, and sanctions/approves of self injury. When anyone immerses themselves in a culture, they begin to identify with and adopt the views and behaviors of that subculture. I visited a lot of web pages and forums when investigating this (and I was smart enough to identify the joke ones!). I have watched a few kids go from good grades, good friends, and good families, to being in the local psychiatric hospital with cuts up and down their arms. The only factor in their history is that they started hanging out with the local "emo" crowd. It's clearly the worst "social contagion" that I have ever seen. In addition to the negative and self destructive messages that kids get from "emo," there is a movement against Christianity in our society. So, essentially, kids are hearing all sorts of hopelessness and death, and their access to the Gospel is limited. I see this as an overall part of the decline of our culture. As for the pressures on teens, I probably said that too. My parents were baby boomers, I was generation X. My parents talked about Vietnam, and their friends being drafted and dying in a rice patty. I grew up during an arms race between the US and the USSR. We still had air raid drills in elementary school (because we all knew that crouching under school desks protects us from the effects of nuclear weapons-LOL). I lived in SW PA, which was at that time a major industrial center. We knew that if a nuclear war broke out, the USSR would saturate the area with multiple warheads. We lived daily under the threat that the next thing we saw would be a bright flash and then nothing. I'm not saying that one was any worse than the other. Different times, different stresses, different circumstances, and we all thought that we had it worse than the others, because that was what we lived. Every generation has thought that the previous one had unreasonable expectations. The key thing here is that no matter what man does, no matter what the historical circumstances, God is here (then, now and forever), and He does not change.
     
  10. Uhuh Uhuh I see your point. But I still don't see the link between emo and depression, but that's just me. I listen to emo-music like the entire time and I think I can say that I am the happiest girl you'll ever meet i mean... I dance, sing, do crazy... I'm always really happy.

    I have been depressed in the past though, but I know why that was and I don't think it was because of the music.
     
  11. I am a tounge talking, spirit filled Christian! :)
    I also like the emo music (not the lyrics, the beats)
    I am very into the emo Culture, and what I found out is... Not all Emos Cut themselves! :)
    True, the world classified Emos as "Cutters"... but my Youth paster said to me, that also, strait A's students could be cutters aswell. So Labeling "emos as cutters" is general stereotypical crud you'd get from the world lol.
    So what I'm getting at, Emos are hurting inside! They are searching for meanging in the world! The World is going to fail them! What they need is Us to get up off our butts and tell them about Jesus! :)
    Lol, I know you're gonna say, "Well duhh..." Yes, but... suicide is on the rise, there is still hate, there is still pain... Where are we?! Whate we need is a revival! Not America! But in OUR HEARTS! Revival Starts in our Hearts and spreads like a wildfire! Immagine it! IT, Will, Be, CRAZY! :) And it is!
    There is a place for Christian Emo music on Facebook (since I can't link it probably lol) The page is called "Chremo"
    I'm finding Christian Emo bands, so people won't have to listen to the depressing emo music!
    I hope I wasn't too long lol!
    God bless EVERYONE! :)
    p.s. not all emos wear tight clothing (Tight pants hurt lol)...
    p.s.s. Emo is short for Emotional, God gave everyone Emotions, so everyone is emo; Satan and the world has corrupted true "EMO"
     

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