Hi everyone, As some of you know, my husband Shane and I are trying to adopt. We tried getting pregnant and couldn't, consulted doctors and though we are both fertile, I'm unable to carry a child due to my severe anemia. This broke our hearts, but we decided that a child is yours, not because you gave birth to him/her, it is because your raised them and were there for them in their lives. We've been struggling financially for quiet sometime in NYC and we have been trying to leave this city for the South. We've been trying to raise money and it has been hard. However, as far as money for adoption, that money is coming from my mother who wanted to help us pay for an adoption since she knew that private adoptions are hard and can be very expensive. Also, we are using money from my father's house being sold (my father passed away in 1997) that I inherited and shared with my brothers and mother. We decided to put up an ad to find a birth mother in the South where we are hoping to adopt. We do not want to adopt in NYC. We've contacted by a birth mother who said that she had a little girl and was now facing a pregnancy that was the result of a one night stand. She said that she resided in Arkansas and that the father of this baby wanted nothing to do with her or her baby and that she is sure she wants to give up the baby for adoption. We got excited, of course and we told her that we would help her with finances and that she can even have an open adoption if she so desired, the only thing that we ask is that she brings us notarized proof of pregnancy, names of doctors that we can call, and of course, meet with our attorney to make things legal before any funds can exchange hands. We had been down this road before and we were quiet inexperienced. We ended up supporting a woman that was not pregnant and it was a scam that was hatched by her and her boyfriend. This took place in California where the law stated that the funds that we gave her are a "gift" and that we have no legal rights to prosecute for fraud. This was about a year ago and it was the money that were going to use for moving (and that is why we have no money for moving now). This lady that contacted us recently got very agitated and said that she was getting evicted from her apartment the next day at 6:00 pm and that we had to help her keep her apartment because she is helping us with a family of our own. Again, we said we are sorry, but we need to see legal proof of pregnancy and we cannot take a chance with spending money that was the only money that we have to have a family. She became very agitated that we wouldn't help her and she said that she will contact us on June 1st with the information regarding the notarized pregnancy test, doctor names, etc. She called a couple of more times to ask for money and we stuck to our decision that we only help when there is legal proof and a legal agreement to adopt her baby. Please, everyone, understand that it isn't that we are cheap or cruel, it is just that this is money that my father left through the sale of his house and it is money that my mother is helping me with...this is the only money that we will have to be able to do this because my family isn't wealthy and neither is my husband's family. Well, she stopped calling and on June 1st, no call came, no proof of pregnancy and she was not heard from ever again by us. I was hurt and Shane kept telling me that it doesn't matter. He said that we will find something else. I really don't understand people that want to scam desperate childless couples. To me, it seems like the cruelest thing that you can do to a person. I wanted to share this with all of you and ask you for your prayers regarding this situation. Also, I wanted to ask your opinion on all of this. Did we act correctly? What do you think of that California law that is little more than stealing a couple's adoption money and good intentions? Do you know a mother that would like to help a couple have a family through adoption? Thank you for reading, everyone and God bless you all!