I've started a memoir to show people how I ended up religiously the way I am. Part of this memoir, however, requires retelling some very painful aspects of my childhood past. I find that as I write about them, emotionally, I am reliving them, and I end up as confused and axiety-ridden as I was when I was a child. It feels like it's destroying me. I think I'm supposed to write the memoir; I'm pretty sure it's what God wants me to do in Christ--but it's killing me, and I don't know what to do. Any advice?