Taking Care Of Family

Discussion in 'Family and Parenting' started by Serve2GRow, Jan 27, 2014.

  1. Hi Everyone,

    Back in June my brother-in-law came to live with us. He's an Ex-con and has a history of money and drug issues. I was recently saved around the same time he asked to move in and I agreed to help him out. He had nowhere else to go. About two months later he was arrested for a warrant related to old drug charges. He left for two months and was released. He asked to stay with us and I just didn't want him back. He showed signed of drug abuse and living the fast life. (nothing changed)
    But my wife (his sister) allowed him to move in anyway against my will. That was back in August. It's been over 6 months and he hasn't gotten a job or chipped in on any bills. He does clean and has since appears to be off of drugs. I don't feel right with him being there especially since we have two kids, but my wife feels we should always take care of family first.

    I've asked her to multiple times to ask him to leave. I don't feel right kicking him out if It's only going to cause resentment and stress in my already fragile marriage, so I've pressed my wife to make him leave. The deadline for him to move out is coming soon. 2/1/2014 and he's made no progress in finding a place to stay. He has no money and no job. My wife doesn't want to put him out with no where to go. I completely understand. He's able to work and has no physical or mental limitations besides not having a car and having a felony record. (Not to mention tattoos covering his entire body including hands, neck all the way around and even his head.

    My question is: Is it right to put him out when he has no means of taking care of himself, no resources that are legal, and will basically end up doing drugs and/or going back to jail when I have the means to help him out longer if needed?

    At what point, do we say we've done our part now its time to move on and whatever happens happens? God says if you take care of the least it's like taking care of me, so am I turning away from my spiritual obligation to continue to provide for him when I know he can't provide for himself?
  2. We are commanded to give the Gospel, help those in immediate need, tecah, train, edify in the things of God. We are to be an example...


    When the things of God are rejected, we move on...'don't cast your pearls before swine'; when rejected 'shake the dust off your feet' and move on. Your family is 'those who do the will of your father (God)'. Being an example of 'slothful' is unhealthy to your children's perception.

    Being allowed to be taken advantage of for the purposes of glorifying God's kingdom is one thing; but allowing 'sin' to be perpetual is a sin unto yourself as the spiritual leader of the household.

    The best answer I can give you is this: make sure you have ministered to your brother in law as God would have you; if he is not willing to make changes in his own life, you need to figure out when enough is enough and take action. Your wife should support you in this as well.
  3. Brother Mike, you're filled with spiritual lessons only a true believer could provide. I am grateful for your insight and wisdom. I need to take the focus off my needs and put him first as I would God, but not allow sin to grow or become an enabler. Now that you mention it, I've failed him as a spiritual leader or my household.

    There's only room for sin if we allow it and doing nothing is sometimes just as bad as sinning itself.

    Thanks Brother Mike

  4. You flatter me much; it's not me be He that dwells in me. Praise God!

    Let the Holy Spirit guide you....

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