Discussion in 'Biblical Advices' started by In2Him, Sep 12, 2007.

  1. Shyness

    My whole life I've been very shy. I was wondering why God made me this way. I have a few friends and I'm not exactly popular. Sometimes I feel very lonely and depressed. Most of the time I need people talk to but no one to talk with. I pray to God for confidence to live the life he wanted me to live. I was wondering why God made me this way, and should I change or continue to live a lonely life. I have a few BEST CLOSE friends that are always there for me, but I still feel alone. Thanks in advanced, Love & Peace. God Bless.
    add me if u got a myspace, :)
  2. Kevin, I tried to add you to my friend list but I have to know your last name or email, unless you change those settings.
    Well, I see you are a very handsome young man.
    Many shy people grow out of it with age and/or become very successful.
    Focus on God's word more and believe in Him and in yourself, a creature he molded, and will continue to mold in your walk with Him.
    God Bless You!

  3. In2Him- forgive the cut and paste as I am about to go out- good people skills can be learned and the following advise CAN help change your life:

    Brother your condition isn't at all uncommon- I a so intravert that if I let myself I would take on many charecteristics of a hermit- But that isn't God's will for either of our lives. I have raised my sons on the following principles when dealing with people:
    1. Stand up straight and tall and look whoever you are talking to in the eye- body language says alot about who you are
    2. Smile- make a concious effort to smile when greeting and talking to people- just like the old song said- smile and the whole world smiles with you cry and you cry alone- IF YOU HAVE TROUBLE DOING THIS SPEND TEN MINUTES A DAY SMILING AT YOURSELF IN THE MIRROR- I am not kidding you will start to smile naturally all the time!
    3. Expect the person(s) you are talking to to like you- after all you are a nice person with alot of good things to say- if you aproach a person with this attitude in your mind you wil be more at ease- this will put the other person at ease and the conversation will flow
    4. The biggest factor in most conversations is learning to be a good listener- ask the person about themselves, their interests etc and before you know it you will both be at ease and having a good time getting to know each other

    These are things that if practiced can and will help your situation- it is also important to remember that most people are very insecure but many of them are really good at hiding it- just like you they want to be liked, loved and accepted- this is the way God made us
    Blessings brother Larry
  4. Thanks Violet, uh my last name is moo. Feel free to add me. Appreciate the support.

    Be sure to do everything is listed, because at Church I feel very alone and quiet. I feel God will have a path for me, and obviously God made a reason why I posted this. He has a reason for everything, am I right? Thanks, God Bless.
  5. I'm quite shy too, well, I was for a few years. I'm trying to snap out of it now.
    I was not a shy child in the least. But when I reached school, I was suppressed and teased by my peers and basically felt like I was not good enough to be around them.
    But that's a lie, and should I believe a lie?

    Here's how I try to snap out of shyness.
    It all boils down to fear of others and what they think of one, right? Well, I make a choice every day to ignore what others think of me or what they might think of me. Because their thoughts don't last, it's only God's thoughts about us that will ever last.
    How long have you thought of a random person on the street with a strange hat on, for instance? You might say to yourself "What a strange hat!" but a few hours later other thoughts will have taken over and the person with the strange hat will be long gone from memory. Fleeting human thoughts aren't worthy of our worries! Only God's thoughts of us should be the ones we worry about. :)

  6. Yes, Kevin, God does have a reason for everything and when we focus on Him, those reasons become more clear to us.
    Boanerges, above has some very helpful suggestions too!
    God bless!
  7. In2Him now that Violet has recieved your name I removed it for security reasons. On any public forum (even a close family like we have here) you never know who is online looking. I respectfully request that any personal info you feel the need to give out be done by way of private message- this is for your protection- blessings brother Larry
  8. I am an introvert also. Also, not all introverts are the same with regard to their introversion. Additionally, not all introverts are shy, although an introvert could be shy as well. The two are not synonymous.

    Introversion is a personality trait. I am a strong believer that personality is inborn, but shaped in small part by the environment. So, while you can do things to become more extroverted, you will never fully become an extrovert. That being said, I think it is good to learn to love who you are and how God created you with all the positive traits that come with being an introvert. There are a lot of great qualities about being an introvert!

    The thing about personality is that there is no right or wrong personality-- just differences. While you might admire certain traits that others have and you don't, think of all the traits that you have and others are admiring! Take a personality inventory. Examine who you are. Look at all the areas that are wonderful about you and make you special. Look over what areas might be viewed as negative by others about your personality, but realize that those places are not negative traits. They are areas that others might misunderstand about you, and you may need to learn to let go or compromise in those areas.

    I, personally, love personality inventories and studying the various personality make ups of individuals. (I've even been formally trained in this area.)

    The problem, In2Him, is not who you are or how you were created...... it is in how you view yourself. You have a few close friends-- excellent! I know many extroverts who can't even say that. They may have hundreds of "friends" but often they are not really close to any. Some of the most extroverted individuals still feel "lonely" the way that you do. Loneliness is not a symptom based upon how many friends we have. Good thing, or I would be the loneliest person around!!! :p

    Kevin, I don't have myspace, so I can't add you. I refuse to join those things. If you ever want someone to just talk to about anything from school problems to quantum mechanics then shoot me a PM on the forum here. :) (Although I may not be able to discuss the quantum mechanics part very well. :D )
  9. You're shy, quiet, meek, humble...why would you want to change?

    God made us, every last one of us, in His own image. When he fashioned you, he made no mistakes. Some people, he gave the gift of conversation; some people he gave them the gift to carve wood into beautiful sculptures; some people he made loud and boisterous; some people he made proud (maybe too proud); some people he gave a dazzling personality that would attract others; some people, he made quiet and humble...folks like you, who do most of their thinking on the inside, with their hearts.

    Shy and humble go hand-in-hand. I think everybody in the world feels shy at one time or another...but instead of trying to fight that traight and become something else that you might not be comfortable with--why not embrace it? Accept it as something that the Lord has blessed you with; it's not a curse.

    God loves a humble man. You may not be rich with crowds of friends, but I'm sure that the friends that you have are pure and would far surpass the diluted hearts and fair-weather friends that might surround a "popular" person. Your friends, I suspect, are of quality...and not quantity.

    You can be rich in so many things in this world,, friends, respect, popularity, physical beauty, and so on. Some of those riches, you're going to be allowed to take into the next life. But some of them, you're going to have to leave behind.

    There's absolutely nothing wrong with you. How I wish I could be more like you, in fact! Sometimes I find myself being too proud, too loud in my conversations, too ready to share my opinions with other people and try to make them see things exactly the way that I'm seeing them. God has blessed me with the ability to share my thoughts in writing, and I'm trying very hard to use that blessing for His glory. To me, this is something that I sometimes take for granted. It's "normal" for me.

    With you, what seems like a bad thing can actually be a blessing. You're shy, humble, meek. Embrace that part of you, because not everybody in this world is able to feel what you feel.

    Matthew 5:5

    God bless ;)
    Shy: wary and distrustful; disposed to avoid people or things. Easily startled or frightened. Lacking self-confidence. (as defined by the Sage dictionary)

    Meek: Humble in spirit or manner; suggesting retiring mildness or even cowed submissiveness. Very docile. (sage)

    Humble: Marked by meekness or or modesty; not arrogant or prideful. (sage)

    Pride: Unreasonable and inordinate self-esteem; a feeling of self-respect and personal worth; satisfaction in your own achievements. (sage)

    II Chronicles 7:14
    Job 22:29
    Psalms 9:12
    Psalms 10:12
    Psalms 10:17
    Psalms 34:2
    Psalms 69:32
    Matthew 18:4
    I Peter 5:5
    I Peter 5:6

    Psalms 22:26
    I Peter 3:4
  10. I too am Shy and quiet, I dont like it.
    Can someone explain what the meeks are and where there are scriptures about them in the bible?

  11. God made you who you are, by bringing things into your life. Given not everything is from God.

    I have noticed that God does have a plan for everyone, it is up to us to follow it. However, God has a reason. Shyness is a very good way to protect you. Keeping you away from those who, in the end might hurt you or worse. Someitmes God calls those that don't have a lot of friends to do special tasks or to be prayer warriors or such. That way you can dedicate all you have to His works as opposed to you own, like posting on forums all the time, like me. Although I feel that my job isn't simply with my profession but to raise a Godly can Christ centered family and have my site ministry, to help in spreading His word. No I don't know everything but I know enough to help. And I'll grow like anyone else.

    Anyway, if shyness is from God, there is a reason, if you've made that yourself, He will bring you out of it, eitherway, trust in the Lord that He shows you His will and follow it.

    God bless,
  12. The meek are spoken of in the beatitudes. (Luke 6:17-36)

    It is written that the meek will inherit the earth.

    I thank God that I too am meek. Shyness is not a sin. Shyness is a blessing. All who glorify themselves will be humbled, but the meek will be lifted up.
  13. Wow thank you all for your responses, appreciate them a lot. I understand now, I will live the life God has made for me. Thanks, again. Love & peace, God Bless.
  14. Well, I was also like this, for the longest time, and even tho I have confidence now, I still only have a few friends, but I'd rather a few GOOD friends then a million acquaintances. but thats me though =p any way I really didn't over come it till a guest speaker at church preached on the empowered believer, and it's God's will for you to be confident, just not prideful, biggg difference. idk just keep that in mind =] what ever you do don't lose your relation ship with God though, keep it stronger then ever. added u on my space to though. -Dave
  15. Amen, Amen and Amen-good points JohnathanAmber- I just just thinking the other day how I can look back and see just how God protected me- I was a hormonaly driven teen and if I wasn't shy my life could have very well been ruined- I was thanking Him and giving Him praise for His wisdom on this very subject! Blessigns brother Larry
  16. What about the outgoing people, their lives aren't ruined? Thanks, God Bless This.

  17. I undersatnd what you are saying Jonathan. If shyness is from God, why isn't it mentioned in the bible anywhere.

    I'm a very shy person and I really don't like it.

    My experience with shyness is that throughout my life I have been held back from doing alot of things through fear. My shyness is so bad sometimes that I get scared to be centre of attention or to read aloud etc.

    The bible says that 'the Lord did not give us a spirit of fear..' I just feel that my shyness is holding me back even from doing the things the Lord is calling me to do.. Sometimes I'm even too shy to go to church alone ... :-(

    I used to see it as the enemy trying to supress me. I see Shyness as a bondage... Only when I really pray to the Lord for strength do I overcome these feelings of anxiety caused by my shyness...

    What can I do?????


  18. What happens when the shyness stops you from doing anything. Is it still a blessing..? I've tried to overcome my shyness because I thought it was a stronghold.. because my shyness actually produces fear..
  19. It can certainly be an attribute but like anything else it should be in balance and proper perspective.
  20. Proverbs 29:25


    When I was in high school, I was like that...I was so shy it hurt just to walk from class to class between bells. When I graduated, I was forced to take a job at a local radio station. I became a popular deejay and somehow my shyness melted away and I became arrogant, boisterous, loud, proud.

    I'm trying to learn to humble myself again, so many years later. Trust in God, my friend...He'll protect you from the fear of human opinion.

    God bless.

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