I’m married to a somewhat decent guy (compared to my insane ex). He does not attend church but claims salvation. Our marriage has gone way downhill since he retired and is home every day. I admit he treats me bad because I allowed him to do it. I have come a long way in my healing. We have several problems that are not getting better. We wnet to Christian counseling 8 months ago and he promised a list of things he would change—he has not done one thing he promised. 1. He is controlling and manipulating. He tries to make me feel everything is my fault. He complain all the time about tiny things like the order of lettuce on his sandwich. 2. He expects me to do everything. He sits on the computer all day while yard and house fall apart. I run a business from home and do all cooking and cleaning. 3. He is into porn—big time. I installed spyware on his computer (he still doesn’t know) He want me to sext and talk dirty on the phone when he is out of town and makes me sick. 4. Last week I tracked him contacting woman from his high school the week before he went back to his hometown. I don't think anything has happened because I can see his emails. 5. Parenting differences. We have pre-teens. I am strict and want to teach them to be responsible and eat healthy. He treats them more like a grandpop. Daily candy and fast food, video games and anything they want. It takes TWO PEOPLE trying to make a marriage work. If one does all the work and the other complains ---it will NEVER work. Every day I feel like he and the children are on one team and I’m on the other. The bottom line is HE DOES NOT APPRECTATE ME!!! My main goal in life is to be a Provebs 31 woman. I am an amazing, intelligent woman. I have overcome dozens of tragedies in my life and came out on top. I successfully run a business from home. I am a terrific cook (99% of people I cook for LOVE my food, he doesn't) and a good housekeeper. I am a wonderful, giving, caring, loving mother. I am a beautiful, sexy wife that he does not appreciate. (I have to say this because I didn't think so until therapy--but I really am, by biggest problem is letting people walk all over me). I'm at the point I want to separate myself from the emotional pain I experience daily. More than that—I want God’s will. I pray for both of us daily seeking an answer.