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Read this! It could save your life!

Discussion in 'Humor' started by NearertoGod, Apr 17, 2008.

  1. Read this! It could save your life!

    There are other dangers in this world...
    Not just the ones on TV...
    Or in the newspaper.

    They are
    Real.
    They are
    Close.
    These are the REAL dangers you can't see on Television.

    Close your windows.
    Lock your doors.
    Bring in the pets.

    Because they are coming!

    So what are these dangers?
    Let's start with the first ones...
    Your
    Neighbors.
    They may look unsuspecting...but they are more than just friendly neighbors...
    They have SECRET INTELLIGENCE!
    YES! SECRET!
    SECRET.
    SECRET!
    They take pictures of you going to the store,
    driving up the street.
    IT IS TRUE.
    THESE PEOPLE ARE SENDING THIS INFORMATION TO PLANT X9122FLU
    YOU MUST MOVE TO ALASKA!
    OR CHANGE YOUR NAME AND RUN!

    THEY'RE WATCHING...
    RIGHT NOW!
    RUN! RUN! RUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNN!

    Okay, now the second one...
    the one you shop at everyday,
    get your food...
    needs...
    supplies...
    the infamous, most deadly place on Earth...worse than any cheesy movie...
    Wal Mart!
    You don't know what is going on in this place!
    They have 42nd Century Items!

    Stuff that can only be accessed by WAL MART TIME TRAVEL!
    And everything you buy...
    Is Tracked.
    Yes, Tracked.
    That harmless little detergent bottle is not harmless.
    It has a video camera and a microphone
    Inside!
    DON'T GO IN THERE!
    THEY ARE TRACKING YOU!

    AND THEY KNOW IT!
    THEY KNOW HOW MANY TIMES YOU VISIT!
    WHAT YOU BUY...

    WHAT YOU THINK!
    EVERYTHING!
    E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G!
     
  2. Other Survival Guides
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    Only $19.95 with shipping and handling! ($2.95 Shipping/Handling)
    BUY AND SAVE YOUR LIFE!
    BECAUSE THE NEWS WILL NOT TELL YOU THIS!
    THEY ARE COVER UPS!
    COVER UPS, YOU HEAR?!!

    so run!
    RUN!
    RUN LIKE THE WIND!

    But don't forget to buy our wonderful Survival Guides!
    Brought to you by SURVIVALGUIDE Publishing!:israel:

     
  3. :D Giggle Snort;)
     
  4. :eek: I'm ttt-tt-terrified now. I can't sleep. :(
     
  5. Would you like a FREE HOW TO SLEEP FASTER GUIDE WITHOUT THE PILLS? with your order? :D
     
  6. lol ,this is not far of,lol.:)
     
  7. war for hearts and minds was a good one,kill there family members and expect them like you.:eek:
     

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