Playing Nice

Discussion in 'Important Things To Consider' started by revlynn, Oct 13, 2011.

  1. Occasionally, we on staff have to deal with false doctrines on CFS and sometimes even ban someone for Statement of Faith violations. By far the greater problem we have to deal with, however, is people's attitudes and reactions to other members. Some of you who have been around for a while will have seen me use the expression, "Play nice or leave the playground." So, I thought it might be time for a few pointers about "playing nice."

    1. Come here to fellowship, not to correct. Few things get up people's noses more quickly than the person who comes on the site with an attitude that we are all ignorant hicks, and his/her mission in life is to set us straight.

    2. Be prepared to listen to other people's views. If you haven't already done so, read Bana's post about the blind men and the elephant. All of us believe we are right. Sometimes we are right. Sometimes we are wrong. Most of the time we are partly right, partly wrong.

    3. Recognize that God is infinite, whilst we are very, very finite. ANYTHING we say about God is going to fall short of the absolute truth, because our tiny minds are simply too small to grasp the absolute truth about Him.

    4. Use the Bible as your authority, not your own opinion or the teachings of man. If you are going to disagree with someone, make your case from the Word of God.

    5. Address the teaching, don't attack the person. Calling a person a heretic, or questioning his/her salvation because you don't agree with his/her stated beliefs is NOT acceptable behaviour, and is likely to get you a quick ticket out of CFS.

    6. Don't chase someone round and round in circles, rehashing the same arguments. In formal debating you get only 3 bites at the cherry: an opening statement, a rebuttal and a closing summary. I believe that a similar rule should apply on forums: state your case from the Bible, answer the arguments put forward by others, summarize, THEN WALK AWAY.

    7. Don't stalk. Just because you have had a disagreement with someone on one thread, that is no excuse to hunt down every post that person makes and attack them.

    8. Chill out and have fun. Form friendships. Join in conversations that are not just about heavy doctrinal issues. Share something of yourself, rather than just pushing your beliefs.


    Relentless, DanielGarneau, chrisstavrous and 1 other person say Amen and like this.
  2. Bear in mind also, that while some are engaged in rough-and-tumble "play", others end up getting trampled or scared off. While any forum has a certain turnover, I know that there are a number of highly valued members who no longer post because they are afraid that anything they post will be challenged and dissected and put down. Sometimes people just want to share without becoming involved in a theological debate. Some people have obviously invested a great deal of time and study into theology, which is good, but they need to expand their repetoire when it comes to relating to others.
    DanielGarneau likes this.
  3. Amen to that Rumely.

    I happen to be one of those who no longer posts much. Oh, I check in just about every day, but I don't post much.

    This forum just doesn't have the same peaceful feel to me that it once had, and that makes me a bit sad. Sorry, but that's how I feel.
  4. Very well stated. In our zeal to grow, we often hit the road at full speed and push forward with all that we are worth, forgetting that there are those one the same road going at a different pace.
    Angela333 likes this.
  5. Agreed.........

    Romans 14:13
    "Let us not therefore judge one another any more, but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother's way".
  6. Good stuff. Why not make it a requirement that all members agree to and sign this list????

    Consider me SIGNED today!.
    DanielGarneau, autumn oddity and JG27_chili says Amen and like this.
  7. Very well stated revlynn, I wholeheartedly agree with you.
  8. Yes, you are one of those I was thinking of when I posted. :)
    DanielGarneau likes this.
  9. I take part in a couple of other forums. They're not religious forums. Right now, this is the only Christian forum I post in. In the past, I've posted in a couple of others, but mostly lurked.

    Those secular forums are usually very "nice" in comparison to Christian forums (without regards to this forum :)). I almost think some of the big Christian forums are designed to cause chaos and a loss of faith.

    At times, Christians can be accused of acting worse than the heathens. This was Paul's complaint to the Church of Corinth. A major portion of what Jesus said was devoted to criticizing the hypocritical behavior of religious people of his day. Today, we see it in Divorce statistics of believers vs. non-believers. And, we see it in the civility of various forums.

    I don't believe this is because Christians have less desire to be good or because of Christianity itself. But, I do think it is a result of a lot of self-righteousness and people being dogmatic over poor doctrine (always a cause of smoke). Forum conflict is also also because Christianity matters more than what's a good game for the Xbox.
  10. Yes I agree 100% The compassion for our fellow brother/sister has become a bit too much a debate in some ways. I myself want to learn more about Jesus ways . My prayer goes out to all the people here that they may be humbled by the Holy Spirit. As brother Jeff says in 1 of the rules "Pray before posting"
    Remember that the devil is throwing fiery darts at us all the time to try and break us up. By the Grace of God that will not happen here! Amen

    Gods people are supposed to be filled with the Joy of Jesus

    Peace to you all

    Now Chill out and enjoy the Peace of God

    Chili out. hehehehehehe
  11. Aw!!! Thanks for thinking about me Rumely. Means a lot. :)
    Rumely likes this.
  12. Thankyou for posting this timely reminder Lynn. We must always remember that whatever we do or say here we do and say in the PRESENCE of Christ Himself for as Jesus Himself said (Matt 18:20) "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." We must be under no illusion, Christ Himself is HERE on CFS all the while those who are in Christ are gathered here. Our behaviour here will not go unnoticed.

    But sadly it is a fact of THIS world that where 2 or 3 are gathered together in His name and Christ is there in the midst of them, you can be certain Satan is sneaking around the back door looking for a way in.

    No matter how well moderated and administered it is inevitable that Christian forum sites end up a mixture of persons and "personas". I know many atheists in particular love to create the persona of a believer on Christian forums simply to have "fun" wreaking havoc and stirring up arguments and trouble. In fact it is not unusual to have some create several persona ID's at once and either have them support and compliment each other or "gang up" on others, etc. Others will repeatedly leave under some pretense and return as another persona. Either to avoid detection or to create the impression people are leaving or being forced off the forum. Sadly the internet being the way it is, it is virtually impossible to prevent this happening and it is simply something we must be aware of.

    BUT the upside is that while they ARE here we CAN at least minister to them and bear witness to them of the truth and love of Christ. The reason a person comes here is not as important as what they find when they get here. Hopefully they will find Christ here in those here who are in Christ.

    To those here who may feel less willing to participate because of the behaviour of some I would encourage you to not let the antics of a few silence the voice of Christ that is in YOU. If you are doing those positive things Lynn has mentioned you are a powerful witness for Christ. Be assured your true brothers and sisters in Christ here who are strong in their faith will not be fooled by anybody who misuses the scriptures or who does not display the fruits of the Spirit. even if they repeatedly apologise for NOT displaying them.

    And to those brothers and sisters in Christ here who ARE strong in the faith and knowledgeable in the scriptures as written I urge you to OPENLY and POSITIVELY encourage, support AND protect our "weaker" (less robust but still our equal) brothers and sisters, especially if we see them beset by aggressive and unwarranted opposition to their words.

    The bottom line is, if WE want CFS to be a place in which Christ and the love of Christ reigns then He and His love must FIRST reign in those here who are in HIM.

    You will know when the orchard belongs to the Lord when you see the nature of the fruit that most of the trees bear. And the more trees in the orchard that profusely bear it the easier it will be to spot those trees that do not belong to it.
    DanielGarneau likes this.
  13. This is awesome I'm glad there are being rules set :)
    DanielGarneau likes this.
  14. I agree and accept this rules..
  16. Sorry Mellow. I hit the wrong button and deleted your response.

    Your response was ..

    Hi :confused:
  17. I undeleted it.:D
  18. Thanks Rumely. And, sorry again.
  19. I'm a little confused here.

    In regards to this conundrum, correcting one another in Christ's love is a necessity whereas not correcting someone in error would be apathetic towards that fellow believer's good standing with the Lord.

    I believe the judging that scripture speaks against is condemning one another, but the judging that Christ spoke of is correcting one another and not being hypocritical in doing so.

    Paul taught excommunication of an unrepentant brother in fornication in 1 Corinthians 5th chapter in the hopes that it will lead him to take the matter seriously and repent to be allowed back into fellowship. Paul did not say that those that say that believe but fornicate are not saved nor declaring that they were liars about believing in Jesus Christ. Nowhere in the Bible are we going to find scripture endorsing that kind of judgment. In 2 Thessalonians 3:1-7,14-15, Paul spoke of wicked and unreasonable men that have not faith and that they depart from the traditions taught of us. Paul went on to teach that if any brother walk disorderly, that we, as believers, were to withdraw from, but Paul made it clear that we do not treat these wicked and unreasonable believers as enemies, but to admonish them as brothers.

    If we remember those that err as the least of His brethren, then whatever we do or not do to them, we are doing or not doing to Jesus.

    Anyway: I agree that condemnation along with biting and devouring one another is not the tact to take anywhere.

    Galatians 5:14 For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. 15 But if ye bite and devour one another, take heed that ye be not consumed one of another. 16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

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