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Need some advice with a long distance relationship

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by gregwootton86, May 31, 2008.

  1. Need some advice with a long distance relationship

    Hi guys. This is my first post here so hope you can help with this or give any possible advice. So about 5 or 6 years ago I met a girl from Texas (I live in Ontario, Canada) on ChristianChat.com. For the first couple of years we were friends and evetually grew closer. We dated for as day or two and I made a few mistakes I admitted to her and we lost contact for a little while and soon started talking again. Anyways we've been talking now for a good 2 years now and have grown a lot closer and more serious now. Were in more of a position to make things happen. We feel were meant for each other, dating, getting married. She pretty much might have to move to Canada because i'll soon be finished college and have a stable job. But here is our problem that I need advice on. We can't meet for at least a year now and cannot get married for at least 4. She still has school to finish and we wish there was some way we could make things happen a little faster. Is there anyone on here who is or has gone through the same thing that might have some advice for us? Any advice is greatly appreciated.
  2. My advice is that either one of you has to make the sacrifice and go over to either ontario or texas. The only way things are gonna speed up is if you're close to each other. Although i'm not saying waiting for a while is wrong, you've built your relationship through long distance so you probably don't have any problems communicating that way.
  3. [​IMG]

    Hello, Greg! I'll leave the advice to wiser heads than mine. I just wanted to welcome you to the forum! This is a great place with a lot of love and compassion! You will find some very wise people here that can help you out with this question.
    Very nice to meet you!
  4. No advice right now but a warm welcome and lots of prayer.:D
  5. Thank you guys! I think God has answered our prayers because I talked to Andre'a today (thats my girlfriend or friend that I am talking about, my name is Greg Wootton). Anyways we feel God has answered prayer because she was talking to her brother last night and she had realized that for what she needs to teach in Canada she can finish my December 2010. She has also dreamed from the very day she was born to be married by age 23, which she feels is in God's plan for her. In 2010 she will be 23, the very year she will be finished school. She also felt that God told her last night that we are meant to be, that we could be married by 2010 and that she would live here. She feels God and the way her school is going that she is meant to teach here. So we'll have to meet a few times and hopefully what she heard from God will happen for us. But thank you for the advice and elcoming me to this forum. I'll try my best to be an active part in this forum and try to help anyone I can.
  6. I was going to say ask God.
    Just remember, it helps if both people hear the same thing. You should both ask God. If one of you hears one thing and the other hears something else, one or both of you isn’t hearing from God. God never contradicts Himself. There must be agreement between the two of you and between both of you and God. When that happens, it’s a pretty good bet that it is God.

    I met my ex wife on the internet. She was 1,000 miles away. She moved to where I was. It worked for a few years, but now that it is over, we both realized it never should have happened. We did what we wanted to do, not what God wanted us to do. God is using it for good now though. That is a blessing.
  7. hi.. sigh.. i need advice on this issue as well... i met a Christian guy whos interested in full time ministry, and alll that, we met on christianforums. and we exchanged msn. we talked more often, i have his facebook account, and he seems pretty consistent regarding his walk with God, really into missions while at his uni he shares gospel, i read thru his notes on facebook, and again it reflects his earnest desire to walk close to Jesus. the prob is, im falling for him, and i think he knows, i think he has feelings for me. and he lives in Illinois, i live in Malaysia. =( i just wanna forget about him, but i guess i really like him. =(
  8. Well seems like you live further away from him compared to me and the girl I met but I know what you two are going through. Its nice to meet someone in the same situation, we can relate and that sort of thing. It can work. A relative of mine is from Ontario and met his wife somewhere near Russia. Even after they got married it was a year till she actually got into the country, someissues they went through that i'm unsure of. But just pray and if you need someone to talk to i'm here.
  9. I'm also very close to a woman, where I live in the US and she in Canada. But my question to you Greg is, whats holding you back from praying to God for His plans for you both? Who's to say God wouldn't have you move to her area and He supply you work there?

    Besides that, who's to say God will have you come together when you and she may want? What if you both try and it don't work? That might be because you two are trying to do things on your own, not according to God.

    I'm 51 and still single. My girlfriend is 53 and divorced, but neither have the money to come together as yet. We've been praying to God and letting Him guide how things are to go for us. Neither of us, even if attracted to each other, are sure we are right for the other. That has to be God's decision, not ours. And we've known each other more than 2 years now.

    An attraction to another does not mean its of God. Both people have to be in prayer for God to show them they are mean't for each other and for God to guide all aspects of thier relationship, that God will show both, what God wants for each of you.

    God Bless!!
  10. I tried a long distance relationship, but it didn't work. Neither of us was willing to move.
  11. Greg, I think one of you has to decide to move. That is the only thing that is keeping you from each other. Best of Luck.
  12. Hi there,
    I have had long distance relationships as well. My most recent was only 2 1/2 hours away. We met on a Christian dating site. We dated for 2 years.
    God blessed me in my life and I got a job that brought me only 40 min away from this gentleman.

    However, let me say this.. we both had issues that God had to work out in our lives. We were dating amongst the things that God needed to deal with. We were sexually involved, which God did not want. We declared sexual purity this past January. I moved here in April. I told God the new job was not about the money, nor my friend. It was about where God wanted me.

    I broke up with my boyfriend within the last month. I knew it was what God wanted. You see, we both had not dealt with some serious issues in our lives. I still tried to control things my way. That just did not work! Now that I have put all in God's hands it is amazing the things that are happening. I have been led to an amazing church, the nicest home I have ever rented, led to a Celebrate recovery meeting to be a leader, and so much more. My friend is being led now by God to seek help with his issues.

    My counselor told me the best thing to do is to break away and if this is truly from God , all will be shown.

    This is where ya got to have faith and PATIENCE. In the meantime, I keep filling myself with God and having him be my husband for now as he prepares a Godly husband for me. Will it be this person that I loved for 2 years? God knows. He sees all and he does show if we just sit still and listen.

    Have a great day
  13. Greg: If I read this correctly, you haven't met in person yet?

    I certainly cannot tell you whether or not this is right for both of you. That's between the both of you and God. :)

    My first advice is that if you haven't met in person, find a way to get together SOON!

    I "met" my wife on the Internet. I was living in Colorado and she was living in Pennsylvania. God opened many doors for us to be together. I had just started a new job and I actually had just gone on vacation, so I wasn't sure I would be able to take any time off to go visit her. Well, God opened the doors to allow that to happen and I went and visited her. After that weekend (in April) we decided that I would move to Pennsylvania. The lease on my apartment expired in May and I found someone to take my apartment after I moved out. There was a house right across the street from her that was available and everything "fell into place" for me to buy the house before I moved out there. After moving out to Pennsylvania (with no job lined up) a job became available.

    We got married the following year and we've been together 10 years now and have three kids! :)

    ETA: I just re-read your post - We can't meet for at least a year now, so you haven't met in person yet and you've known each other online for over five years? Greg! Buy yourself a plane ticket and get your butt up to Canada right now!

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