My marriage is almost destroyed, please help Hello all, just joined tonite and hoping someone can help me. This is long so grab a cup of coffee, snack, whatever. Here's the situation. For several years I have not been anywhere near as close to God as I used to be. And a couple of months ago I met another woman and became attracted to her (I am married). This is the first time in 8 years of marriage that the thought or temptation of an affair has become real to me. And sad to say I didn't pass the test. I fell for her hook, line, and sinker. The good news is we did not have sexual relations. But in my mind I definitely did. This woman is also married, and 7 years older than me. Long story short..... This rocked on for maybe 2 or 3 weeks until she decided she just wanted to be "friends". Well this upset me pretty hard, because I had already developed feelings for her. (Wife still doesn't know). 8 years ago before I met my wife, I was a devout alcoholic, nonstop, 7 days a week. I gave it all up when I met her and had been sober ever since. I guess all the stress/conviction of this situation got to me and I went and got something to drink. Thinking this would be a temporary thing to get me through. Well this was probably almost 2 months ago and now I'm battling alcohol addictions everyday, and for the most part give in to them. Just two weekends ago I came home drunk and my wife found out that I'd been drinking all this time but I didn't tell her about the other woman. Then last weekend I got drunk again and while I was staying at a friends house (because wife asked me to leave) my wife went through all my emails and found out about this other woman. Now the cat is out of the bag so to speak and my marriage is on the rocks. Good news is my wife is willing to work with me and resolve everything....but during the course of this I feel like I've lost all feelings of care/love towards my wife and don't want to work this out. But I know in the bottom of my heart I need to do everything possible to save my marriage because I have a good woman that loves me dearly. I feel no remorse for what I've done most of the time. I have prayed for forgiveness and help but it seems like it's all I can do to keep from thinking what fun I'd have being single again. Our marriage has been pretty rocky the 8 years we've been together, but I know thats no excuse. Here's my problem in a nutshell...I hear all the time about God's mercy and grace for my problem and how the battle is the lords and not mine. But how do I let him fight this for me? How do I give in and break my own will? I know taking the single path again is not the right choice and I'll probably be dead or in jail within a year if I do. I feel the temptations and addictions so strong I feel totally powerless to even pray for help when they come. I'm still talking to this other woman, which is one thing I need to stop doing I know. But again, I feel like I've lost all power to do what's right anymore. Please help.