Moderator Comment: Please pray for andy1982 and her family for an unspecified issue

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by andy1982, Aug 5, 2009.

  1. Moderator Comment: Please pray for andy1982 and her family for an unspecified issue

    Dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

    I kindly ask you all to please mention my husband in your prayers.

    I moved out about month and a half ago. The situation was really bad and he had asked me to leave him, while saying that his decision is wrong but it's something that he has to do and that he has no choice. At the same time saying he loves me and always will.

    I've been praying for him ever since, asking our Lord to turn him around and open up his eyes.

    I have shared my story on another Christian forum and asked our brothers and sisters in Christ to pray for him and his salvation.

    He's a good man but has been raised in a way, that he thinks it's ok to act on anything he wishes in life and he is able to do whatever he pleases. His parents had split up as he was a teenager and he had troubles and still has understanding any of them.

    He's been in touch with me lately (in the beginning he didn't want anything to do with me), finding excuses to come to my place, but he doesn't talk about the problems. Although I can see, that he's not happy, he's lost a lot of weight, looks pale and very sad most of the times.

    I don't know if my prayers are working, since as I mentioned he talks to nobody about his feelings or problems. I'm so very scared to lose him and especially for him to lose himself.

    Is there anyone here who has experienced similar thing? Any advice is welcome!

    Please, please mention him in your prayers.

    I hope the Lord won't turn His back on my husband, even though my husband doesn't know Him and His grace.

    God bless and keep you all.

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  2. :pray: :pray: :pray:

    :pray: :pray: :pray:

    :pray: :pray: :pray:

    In Jesus' Name!
  3. Awefull situation.

    This is truly a bad situation. If He wants to leave you then your no longer under bondage. Your job is to serve God and not get emotionally involved with a Husband that went the wrong way. (Not as easy as it sounds but true.)

    The only thing I see that could be wrong is your statement here.

    Your joy should not be based on him hanging around, but on the Lord. You also should never, never doubt what your praying and that it may not be working. Without faith you will not please God anyway.

    When dealing with bad marriages this is the hardest thing to deal with. That attachment to the spouse that went bad. Sometimes there is guilt for not doing the right things, grief for a loss of a companion, ETC........ These are all emotions and not based on God's Word. If you were a robot then these steps would be easy to follow without emotion. Please consider them though.

    1) Your husband is not your source. God is.

    2) Your faith and prayers for him are working. STOP DOUBTING!!!
    for God to just rip all your husbands feelings and mixed up, deeply set (WRONG) emotions away would be inhuman to him just to make you happy. Your husband has need of grace and mercy with plenty of Patience. God is not going to just make him think differently because it's better for you. It took years for you husband to get to this point and the power of prayer can and will change that.

    3) Have hope. Don't give up. Your husband believes a lie, but the Word of God is truth. Lies are backed by the devil and there is no truth in him. The Word of God is truth and the light will destroy the darkness and fix your husband. Remember the devil is already defeated so you have a head start on that rascal.

    4) Never, Never preach to your Husband or condemn him. He already knows he is way off track or else he would be happy. God has many ministers that will cross his path. Jesus said pray that he send them out and those people with the Holy Ghost will surly respond.

    Earth and physical objects can be changed by the Word of God. By faith the whole world was made by the Word. (Heb 11:3) God's word can change your situation and you better believe that speaking the word over this will fix it. Light will form in your husbands heart that will grow and grow as he sees the truth. Stay on the Word in you prayers. Here is some help.
    find more for yourself. Here is just some on one book and you don't need to be a bible expert. (Ephesians)

    Sow (over and over until this becomes more real then what you see or hear your husband doing.) this in as truth in What will happen. It will come to pass.


    Eph 5:21-5:33

    Father I am thankful for my husband, and I know He loves me as Christ so loved the church. My Husband loves me as he does his own body, therefore he has joy and loves himself not wanting to do any harm to his own body. My husband and I are one flesh, and of one mind, even as Christ and the church. As I pray, I know you are faithful Lord and will send Laborers to my Husband that he may be clean by the washing of the Water in the Word and he will be presented to me without spot or wrinkle even as Christ does for the church.

    Eph 1:17-1:23

    I thank you Lord that you have given unto my Husband the Spirit of Wisdom and revelation knowledge of you. His eyes and understand are enlightened, that he may realize and know your purpose for his life. A life of a strong man, with Joy and victory. He will know the hope of his calling and what belongs to him in the inheritance of all the saints. My Husband and I believe, and shall get a greater understanding of your mighty power toward us. The same power that raised Christ from the dead is available to us for Victory. I thank you Father that Jesus is far above all demonic power and we are seated with him delivered from the power of darkness. I give you glory that your word says that, and I fully believe that your Word is true. In Jesus Mighty name.

    Eph 3:15-

    read it, believe it.

    The Victory is yours.

    God bless everyone. Peace.
  4. Hi andy1982, welcome. It sounds like your husband is on a journey, which hopefully will end with him coming to know Christ, with his health intact. There doesn't seem to be anything you can do to aid this, or it wouldn't have got to this stage. All you can do is pray, as you are doing, but in order for your prayers to be effective, you need to surrender the situation up completely to God. This means that whether he comes back or not, you will accept whatever God wants to do. With respect, it sounds like you haven't given him up to God absolutely, only then can God give him back to you, if it's His will.
  5. thank you everyone!

    haven't seen my husband for a week by now, just see him on MSN, as he's been mostly on the net, from the early hour till past midnight.

    He wrote over MSN couple of times, but nothing much, just a sentence or two. Gave me a feeling, that he might need someone to talk to, but if I try to talk to him (i.e. he thinks I'm acting weird by not contacting him more) he just gets annoyed in a way... he just doesn't understand why it's hard for me to hug him when I see him and just do all the normal things we did when we were together and just be friends... and then today I asked him what is it that he would like to have, because I sure have no idea whatsoever....he said "it doesn't matter, it's not going to change anything anyway, so why make myself vulnerable".

    I am so confused, don't know what he meant by that. he just stopped typing after that. I know he spent 2 or 3 days away with this new friend of his at some lake, there might have been other "friends" along with them as well. Since he's been back, he's been bedwritten, so he's not working. Just sits home at the computer.

    In a way I think he must be lonely, but I just wish he would step over his pride and talk to me like he used to. I really don't know how to approach him, everytime I try I end up hurt.

    I pray for him still and hope our Lord hears me and helps him, because he's for sure not able to help himself.

    thanks all, again for praying for him/us.

    God bless.
  6. Brain developement

    Hi Andy,
    My heart goes out to you. I will pray for you two. Please pray for us.:groupray:
    This may sound funny but I am praying for my husbands brain development.

    He sounds like yours.

    It seems he has no awareness or understanding of wrong doing.

    We've been going to marraige counseling for 3 years, and there has been no change in his understanding though our male Christian counselor has repeated to him the same advice over and over to him. The counselor even asked me if I have considered divorce?

    The female counselor before him asked me what was I to do if my husband doesn't change.:confused::(:confused:

    He wants to remain married but live a bachelors life as well.

    He is not saved nor does he want to be. He doesn't understand how his behavior is insulting to me.

    He needs a concience.

    I am surviving by the Holy Spirit, and the Bridegroom Christ, and the LOVE of my Father.:D

    His mother who is living with us now doesn't understand his behavior either. She makes it clear to me that she did not raise him that way.

    She doesn't know everything, but can see his coldness and screaming at me over nothing. She tries to talk to him but he won't listen to her either.

    Whew! Our men need alot of help! They seem to be looking in all the wrong places for answers.

    I think this must be a tremendous age of which to live in, concerning temptations for men.:confused:

    That might be a new thread for here.
  7. dear sister,

    my heart aches for you and your husband as well.....could it be women are stronger ones in the relationships? I don't really know.

    I just heard from my husband....he lost his job. Got fired.

    Lord seems to be taking things away from him slowly.....I so hope that if he breaks down, he will consider even asking for help.....
  8. Sometimes people have to reach the bottom before they will reach out and grasp Jesus . The best thing you can do is pray .

    God is bigger than all our problems and as we reach out to Him and realize that only He is our source , the problem will not be fixed. We need to put everything in His hands know that He is able and we cannot do anything in our own strength .

    We cannot make or force others to make decisions . They are accountable for their sins and there are always consequences that follow .

  9. he was gonna come over today to bring me my laptop back. I waited all day, praying that as he comes, for us to be able to talk and for him to open up and talk about the current unemployment problem and problems he is facing...... i waited all day, he came in the evening and gave me my laptop in the door, i invited him in but he said he's meeting up with his father for dinner. I told him if he later on wants to catch a movie or something we could. he thought a little bit and said "i dont think so".

    he's not going to come and talk to me about anything, since I guess I acted too cold last couple of times we met and he did ask me why I was acting like this and I tried to explain, not sure if he understood though.

    I am blaming myself for the fact that now he won't even talk to me.

    I really don't know what to do. I'm praying and praying but God's not responding and I'm just so scared.... There is absolutely nobody here that I can go and talk to. All of my family live abroad and I can't even tell my parents on the phone cos it might just kill them (they are not both so well). The only person I can talk to is my best friend, we phone sometimes, but she's away for a whole month on a holiday in the mountains and has no phone connection.

    It's as if God's testing me ho much I can take and I can tell you it won't be much longer if it goes on like this....I do have faith, but I just can't seem to get stronger lately, I'm deadly scared and alone. I#ve even got to the point where I asked the Lord to please take my life and take me to Him, because there's only so much I can take and I think I've reached it by now.

    please brothers and sisters, mention me in your prayers tonight....

    God bless you all
  10. I agree Dusty.

    A friend told me once that when you are flat on your back there is only one way to look and that is UP!

    Some people just have to fall flat before they will look up, and that is no one's fault but their own.

    :pray: :pray: :pray:
  11. The enemy seems to be working overtime, but
    "if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him;
    and a threefold cord is not quickly broken" (Ecclesiastes 4:12).

    Don't be scared. Trust God. He is working.

    When you feel scared think about this . . .

    There are more than three of us offering up cords of prayer for you,
    so remember that a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

  12. At this point you can only use us as a sounding board and we can listen but we are not do not know all the answers to your questions as we are not professional psychologists .

    We can pray and will for you and tell you that even though you think God is not answering , He never leaves us nor forsakes us and sometimes the answer we might want is not the answer that He has for our lives. He has plans for us to prosper and not to harm us .

    If you want to look at the life of Job and see how every one around him and even his wife deserted him and he still clung to God and was delivered .

    You need to do the same ... stop thinking about the problem and focus on the solution who is Jesus Christ . Look to Him . He is bigger than all your problems . Get inot God's Word and saturate yourself with it . Go to church and find Christian friends who will pray with you ... Go to your pastor and tell him about it instead of making yourself sick and scared .

    God is not the author of fear ... Fear comes from satan and that is why you need to have Christians pray for you .

    Psalm 46:1
    . God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

    Psalm 62:8
    Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Selah

    Jeremiah 29:11
    For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

    Proverbs 18:24
    A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
  13. 1 Corinthians 7:15

    15But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
  14. just a quick update:

    i spoke to my husband yesterday over MSN a little bit....he seems so so angry with the whole world. I just asked him how he was doing, since I hadn't heard from him or OF him for a while, he said he hates that question, since i know exactly that he's doing bad and that I only intended to hurt him by asking this.....I tried to explain that this is not the case, but he didn't want to believe it. he said he doesn't need my pity and that I acted cold towards him last time I saw him so I should just go on acting like that......

    it was so hurtful to read those words.... I had asked him before if he wanted to watch a movie together or go to a concert of one of his fav. artists, but he had turned down both. as he said yesterday he also thought of those as "pity offers" I tried to explain again.....was direct and told him those offers I made because I madly miss him and that this was the only reason, that i had missed him so much, that I don't know what to do with it anymore.

    then i told him i would just sign off MSN, he wrote "bye" and that was it.

    he's not sleeping at night from what i know, he goes to bed early in the morning... spends the beautiful days (we are having really nice summer right now) at home, all windows closed, all drapes shut........

    I really really hope that it will be our Father's will to draw him to salvation, because I'm really scared that this is not going to end well for him....

  15. I have to tell you that darkness and light do not mix and he is feeling threatened by your Christianity and is being convicted . Like every one has already said .... you need to give it over to God and step back and let God work and stop beating yourself up and feeling sorry and making yourself sick .

    That is exactly where satan wants you and you my dear are falling into his trap .

    I can only tell you that when I was in the world before I came to Jesus .... I distanced myself from my family of Christians because I felt very uncomforable around them and he is feeling the same way with you .

    I know it is not easy but God will provide a way of escape for you if you just place it all in His hands . God is bigger than all our problems my dear and you are not the first or last to go through difficulties cause we Christians are not assured an easy path .... but with God all things are possible .... Only believe .

    God never promised an easy ride but a safe arrival .
  16. thank you all for your prayers, again and please do keep them coming....

    as for my husband, nothing new so far, he's still unemployed, still at home and still in darkness.

    we saw each others twice these last weeks, both by coinsidence and he looked pretty bad both times. I had written him 2 text messages in past couple weeks, just to let him know that I'm here whenever he needs me and that i still love him. tried to explain to him that it was just me letting him know how things are with me and where I stand, so just in case he has a change of heart, he knows he's welcome here. he said he thinks by "change of heart" i meant him "changing his sexuality" and said it's "unlikely", but "just in case", he'll know.

    other than that I have been praying for him as much as I can and trying not to interfere with God's work and let Him do his job the way He wants to and the way He intended.

    God bless and keep you all.
  17. Still praying for you!!

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