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I've Got retirement all figured out..... LOL

Discussion in 'Humor' started by Dusty, Sep 6, 2007.

  1. I've Got retirement all figured out..... LOL

    Subject: I've got retirement all figured out!
    > No nursing home for us We are checking into the Holiday Inn!
    > With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per
    >day, there is a better way when we get old & feeble. We have already
    >checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn. For a combined long term stay
    >discount and senior discount, it's $49.23 per night. That leaves $138.77 a
    >day for: breakfast, lunch and dinner in any restaurant we want, or room
    >service. Laundry, gratuities and special TV movies. Plus, they provide a
    >swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc. Most have
    >free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
    > $5 worth of tips a day will have the entire staff scrambling to
    >help you. They treat you like a customer, not a patient.
    > There is a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride free. The
    >handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).
    > To meet other nice people, call a church bus on Sundays.
    > For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at
    >one of the nice restaurants there. While you're at the airport, fly
    >somewhere. Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.
    > It takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn will
    >take your reservation today. And you are not stuck in one place forever,
    >you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city. Want to see
    >Hawaii? They have a Holiday Inn there too.
    > TV broken? Light bulbs need changing? Need a mattress replaced? No
    >problem. They fix everything, and apologize for the inconvenience.
    > The Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The
    >maid checks to see if you are ok. If not, they will call the undertaker or
    >an ambulance. If you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip,
    >and Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.
    > And no worries about visits from family. They will always be glad
    >to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation.
    > The grand kids can use the pool.
    > What more can you ask for?
    > So, when we reach that golden age,
    > we'll face it with a grin.
    > Just forward all our email to:
  2. Sounds like a plan. :funnypost: I will have to remember this idea when I get ready for retirement.
  3. This is so funny!
    I wonder who thought of this?
    Makes sense to me!!!! :D
  4. sounds good to me.
  5. I guess one day we will all be neighbors at the Holiday Inn. :D
  6. May God be with you!

    Hey, did you know you can join their Priority Club and earn points toward things like BBQs!!!!

    Party at my room deck in about 30 years or so!!!! BYOB!!!:D

    God bless you!
  7. There was another one similar to that one only it was about a cruise ship and getting all the service, bed made every day , three meals etc..... Cheaper than a nursing home.

    I guess I could sign up .... :D:D:D:D

  8. Not a bad idea... We could all party together. Wooo Hooo !!!!!:israel::israel::israel::israel::israel:

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