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Is It Wrong For Me To Want To Get To Know A Guy Because He Is Good Looking?

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by ManaX, Jun 6, 2012.

  1. He is christian and part of the church band as a drummer, and i've seen him a few times. I am bent on dating only a christian as i'm not interested in having the type of relationships some of my non-christian friends have.
    The thing is, I think this guy is quite attractive and if I got to know him and liked his personality I would be totally up for dating him. But is this wrong? I know it's not lust, I haven't looked at him that way. I can't imagine attraction working the other way round (getting to know a guy you didn't find at all attractive and then falling for them/a relationship working where you don't find your partner attractive).
    Which leads me another two questions. Is it wrong for me not to want to date a guy if I don't find him attractive and reject him on those grounds alone?
    Is it wrong for me to have a type of guy I like? (and if you must know in short i'm only attracted to guys who look quite alpha).

    Ok i'm ready, you can tear apart my way of thinking, please respond. >.<
  2. You are absolutely correct in looking for a mate who attends church, but more importantly one who truly loves and serves the Lord. Physical attraction to the opposite sex is not in and of itself, a sin; it's what you do with the physical attraction that can become a sin.

    Now, that's funny! :D Blessings to you!
  4. Well, if you are a Christian, it is biblical for you to date a Christian.

    Is attraction bad? Nope. Is it lust? It can be...but in your case, it's not.

    I'm going to answer both of your questions, alright? :)

    "Is it wrong for me not to want to date a guy if I don't find him attractive and reject him on those grounds alone?"
    What do you mean "reject"? Do you mean just reject him on the dating part, or reject him completely (ignoring him, not wanting to be his friend, etc.). I think it's wrong if you reject him as a friend simply because he isn't good looking. And I think it can also be wrong if you're rejecting him just because of his looks and won't give him a chance for his personality to shine. Looks are important...but it's not the only thing. If you're only going for looks and nothing more, that is something that should be examined. Obviously, and I'm saying this because I feel the same thing, attraction is important and you want to be attracted to a guy that you're interested in. However, is it the only thing that matters? No! :)

    "Is it wrong for me to have a type of guy I like?"
    I'm going to be honest, because you have asked us to be honest. It's fine wanting a guy to be attractive. But let's say you meet a guy who's extremely attractive, but you only date guys who are 6'1" and this guy in 6 feet tall. You reject him because he didn't meet that qualification. That shows that you have high standards....and with such high standards, you will not meet a guy who will meet all those qualifications. Maybe you don't have high standards. Maybe you do. I don't know....I don't know you! But maybe you should examine yourself to see if you do have such high standards. Maybe, and just maybe, make a list of the things that you look for in a guy. And be HONEST. You don't have to share it with anyone...it's just for you. So make a list of everything you look for in a guy. After you are done with the list...look at it. Examine it. And then, eliminate the ones, the qualifications, that really don't matter. However, if this list seems good to you, if it seems fine with you, then maybe it is. Becaues having some qualifications for a guy is good. However, having too many, can be unhealthy. Maybe take a list to a very close friend, or even a mentor, and ask them to look at the list and tell you honestly if any of those qualifications may seem too high for a person. It'll help you to realize where you are....=)
    covered_by_grace and JG27_chili say Amen and like this.

  5. TY xspin for female support hehehe
  6. he looks quite an alpha? lol then go fot it! lol

    ask guidance to the Lord, Goodluck
  7. Hey! Ima girl, too!
    <-----See I changed my pic. LOL :p
    j/k, of course! :)
    JG27_chili likes this.

  8. Okie dokie LOL TY 4 your support too
  9. HAHA! Thanks, chili-man! :cool:
  10. ;) ;) ;)

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