Ever since my ugly church experience..... I feel god must hate me, .. When I backslide he never tried hard to get me back on the right path,whereas he would prod others... I feel so ignored... Right now I feel helpless,weak,unloved and just doomed... I can't sleep ( not just BC of this ..but other things too) ... I just feel god only cares for certain people and he's shown ....im not one ... Idk I want to walk away right now nc its just alot to bear.