I Am Confused

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by gracerevher, Aug 19, 2013.

  1. I am married for about 9 years now (on sept.) My husband met a woman and they became friends. At first, i had a bad feeling already but i ignore it. maybe i was just jealous. suddenly, i saw a lot of changes about my husband. He would always mention the name of this woman. talk about her that i really dont want to hear anymore. she would take her home, bring her fruits when she was sick and visit her home. it causes a lot of fights and tears. he tried to avoid that woman, delete her number but after few days he called her again. then one time my husband said that he is inlove with her. i have asked him many times if he felt something for her, and he said no. i was devastated! i thought i was just insecure but my intuation was true. we are trying to settle everything now. but when he cant talk to that woman, he is always sad. he seems so unhappy with me. he said i should give him time to forget. but they are still talking. he said it was a friendly talk but he is acting strange everytime he talks to her. i dont want to throw away the nine years of our marriage. he said he wants to keep this "female friend" of him. he is not happy without her (i think). and i am not happy having this woman in my husbands life. they are having an emotional affair. (i guess). i dont know if i am going to give up my husband and let him be happy or save our marriage. thank you for reading.
  2. Are you both Christians? Are you 'saved'; do you know for sure that you would go to heaven if you died today? How about your husband?

    The best thing you can do is seek out a Bible believing Church and Pastor for marriage counseling ASAP.
  3. I think this would require deeper discussion. 9 years is definitely lot of time. Probably conselling sessions with your local church Pastor would help.
    clark thompson likes this.
  4. Dear Grace,

    It is only temporal. And you should let him be free so he can go and taste the other side to decide.

    I strongly believe he loves you and is just confused by her because she is exciting at this stage.

    When he gets bored believe me he is gonna want to run back to mama / home.

    Don't make it easy at all for him, and don't throw away your marriage so easily.

    Take care of yourself, walk closer with God. find happiness in your other people in your life. go shopping. hang with your best friends. don't let him be the centre of your happiness. Join the gym. get a new look.

    Once he see you are not all that focused on him, and he starts to tire in the other relationship, he will realise his love for you.

    It may take long but don't give up your man without a huge fight.

    Wishing you all the best.
    gracerevher likes this.
  5. Mercedes Benz,
    thank you for the wonderful advice. thank you for being a real brother/sister in christ. God bless you and your family.
    Mercedes Benz E Class likes this.

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