Hey, I'm new to this site so please tell me first off if this is in the wrong section, sorry if it is. For a little background info that may help, I was born into a religious family around a religious community. God has been in my life for a long time and i'm sure of that, however in the past few years my family (mainly my mother, my brother, and I) have really fallen off on our faith and commitment. My mother has cheated on my father (who is a very strong believer and the only person I feel that is holding my family together) and despite his attempts to continue the marriage and work things out, mostly for me and my brothers sake, his health is beginning to fall and I'm getting so scared as time goes on. Me and my father both strongly feel that there are demons of sorts attacking our family in a way and we don't know what else we can do. I have always been somewhat attracted to guys, and I can be "turned on" by other men. I'm ashamed to say it but I have felt crushes for other guys and it angers me so much because I don't want to feel this way and I know it's not right in the eyes of god. A lot of my confusion lies with the fact that I know when girls are attractive, I can easily distinguish that. It's very easy for me to look at a girl and tell that she is beautiful or very attractive but on the other hand I am not sexually attracted towards women and never really have been. Most of this ability to judge women I believe is more from an admiration view point then a sexual one. The one thing I'd like to say is, when I'm inside my house with one of my male friends I view as attractive per say, these urges to sin and do unholy acts are as strong as ever, to the point where I feel I can't resist. However, almost anywhere else the urges are a lot weaker or almost non-existent which gives me reason to believe there are demons of sorts inside my house, I know this is not the right place to discuss paranormal activity type stuff and I'm not trying to offer a possible viewpoint. (By the way, I have not had sex with anyone yet and I really have no interest until marriage but I've had enough "experiences" to be able to tell these feelings) This confusion has really kept me from growing in my faith as in a way, I feel I can't grow in my relationship with God if I continue to feel this way but no matter how much I pray or resist the urges will only temporarily leave if they even do. I want to stress that I don't WANT to feel this way and I understand fully I can't live a complete live with Christ if I continue to do this stuff, I just feel so lost and confused. I'm just asking for some advice from those who are stronger in their faith then me or from those who may have experienced something similar. Anything helps and i'm sorry I've written a lot but this is just such an uncomfortable and private thing for me, I feel I can't share it with anyone I know and I really have no wish to because I feel they'd take it the wrong way. Please pray for me tonight or when you can find time to, I ask that you pray for God to give me the strength to resist these sins that I feel I can't control and that God may help give me some guidance through a very confusing time for me. Prayers for my father's health would also be appreciated.