I got back from an amazing church conference,,,it definitely filled me up...but idk there's still this nagging sad feeling. I look at other Christians who have an amazing walk with God and though I've been saved since 2010 I feel like mine started and stopped, or hasn't begun much. I've changed only in very minute ways...and when I look at other Christians they have so much life inside of them, they're confident ... And it kind of makes me sad because I've been saved for a while and I still feel like the same person..not much has changed... Even when I was reading and praying ...I didn't feel super close to God...I'm baptized and everything...but I know its not supposed to be like this. I want my spiritual life to change and I want to start bearing fruit but i don't know how to go about it. But I do know you're suppos3d to change and people should be able to see it and...I will say my life has changed but only a little bit... I just wish I could get closer to God spiritually... I just feel this summer I made mistakes that could have compromised my health and safety... And Idk it just made me realize I need more self esteem and confidence in who I am... And I just wish I could like everyone else who's comfortable in their skin but I just feel like that will never happen for me..at least not on this plane.