A girlfriend and I were at dinner tonight and she told me she had a pressing opionion of my ED (eating disorder). She feels as though I'm not fully surrendering as in letting go, asking God for my help, getting on my knees, crying etc. I told her that over the course of many years I have done that countless times and yet have only recovered once. To my dismay, my ED came back again last year full force and now I am in the position in which I would rather die. Please do not be alarmed, I am not going to harm myself, but I am at the point where I don't feel I can take this anymore. My question again is how does one fully surrender? I still feel like I'm not doing something right. I read the bible, pray as often as I can (everyday all day), recently deactivated my Facebook, decided to focus more on God, etc., but still very little improvement. Or when I feel I've got this under control, it comes back on again. I don't know what I'm doing wrong and need a miracle.