Hello everyone. I don't like posting multiple threads about similar topics but this is something I'm really struggling to come to terms with and need guidance on. I posted a topic a little while ago about my ex girlfriend whom I am pretty certainly I was madly in love with. To put it blunt and simple, she wasn't a virgin. I was, it tore me up inside. And now we are no longer together. I frequently found myself missing her company and wishing that I hadn't remained celibate as it likely would not have been an issue for me if I had not, but I know thats what the enemy wants me to think. But still I can't help but feel like that. My ex was everything I wanted in a woman minus the lack of virginity and a godly attitude about sex and promiscuity. She often felt as though it wasn't a big deal and there was something wrong with me. Enough backstory though. So now, I've met a couple women. None of them have been really exactly what I want but the ones that come close are never virgins. And I just feel as though if this one girl could have been a virgin and had god helped lead her to a path of celibacy, like myself. We'd still be happy together. Some days I find myself deeply saddened as it seems as though I have a 1 in 1,000,000 chance in finding the woman I desire, if she even exists beside my ex. I feel like I've been saving myself for no reason. Sometimes, I really feel like god is not listening to my prayers. And I know that its impossible to please the lord without faith but I'm finding it increasingly harder to keep it. Hence I'm going here for advice.