Hello from Arkansas! Hello! I am a SAHM to 3 beautiful girls and the happy wife of a wonderful man. I live in a great home in Arkansas and raise puppies and sell Avon to help my husband support us. I am a Missionary Baptist born and raised and have worked in the church singing and teaching children my whole life. I have not been able to do much of that lately as my family consumes alot of my time, but we are starting some new things at church that me and my DH both are going to get involved in. I love the Lord with all of my heart and fall short of his glory daily. I struggle with Chronic Illness and Depression which makes it hard at times for me to follow Him as I should. I have really found myself in a "pit" lately and I WANT OUT! I am trying to get back on track with following God and really trying to listen for His voice through the dogs barking and kids screaming constantly lol. My personality causes me to need LOTS of love and support to be a "good" person. I do well when I feel loved and secure and accepted. When things are tough or in turmoil however, I fall very easily and have a hard time getting back up. I am trying really hard to "find my place" in this world. I am happiest doing exactly what I am doing right now as far as raising my family, staying home with my kids, raising the dogs and selling the Avon. I find great joy in making my DH and children my life. At times I do let Jaclyn get "lost" in the shuffle, but I do ok for the most part. I treasure every single moment with them and I know first hand from loosing my Daddy last year that you never know when the ones you loves time is up. The problem that I am having and I guess have had my whole life is that I just can't get the details right. The little stuff is what I struggle with. I have very strict beliefs as far as how we live and raise our kids, the movies we watch, what we do in our free time, the company we keep. We try so hard. I know we should not compare ourselves in this way but I see people in my life that do not try to live in God's Will as hard as I do and they have it just fine. Things seem to always go wrong for us no matter what we do. A friend of mine said that God does not promise us an easy life and that the better we are doing the harder things will be. I don't buy that. I just don't think God works that way. Also, a question....what does God care about?? To what extent in our service and life is God concerned? Is he concerned with what house we live in? Does he care if we listen to ONLY Christian music? I don't wanna jump in here first day and have you all think I am odd, but I want to know. I want to find out where I am going wrong!! I want to know what I can do to better please my Lord. Thank you all so much, I am so excited t have found this place and I have read enough on here already to know you are all truely a group of loving Christian people. God Bless you all!!