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Getting Into A Godly Relationship For The First Time.

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by RyanUnderGod, Mar 30, 2013.

  1. Hello all, I've been active on these forums sporadically. Anyways, I met this girl recently at a christian fellowship sometime late to mid February. Since then we've been going steadily on dates. We've been pretty honest with each other about our thoughts and feelings. We've both had trouble in the past rushing things with the opposite sex as younger folk tend to do. (let's blame it on all the hormones in the food, shall we :p?) She has been in and out of short relationships that only last a few months for a while so she has made it clear to me that she wants to take the time to know me and take it slow. She is a very Godly person, admittedly more so than myself. Over the summer she will be doing mission work for 2 months out of the state and I'll be a few hours away in a different city doing a summer internship after a short mission trip myself. We talked about how this situation will prevent us from getting into a relationship prior to this as to not complicate things during that period. She mentioned tonight that she cannot promise anything for certain when we get back at the end of the summer, but it looks hopeful that we will eventually become committed. I am basically seeking advice of how to stay patient and deal with the uncertainty of this summer/our situation. I've never been in a committed relationship with a girl, only flings and "unofficial" relationships that have ended as horribly as they started. I'm really trying to do things right and I completely respect and adore her. What sort of advice could you give me. For age reference she is 19 (about to be 20) and I am 22 and we go to the same college.
  2. #1-Make Christ your primary relationship.
    #2-Study the Word (Bible) about what is says on marital relationships.
    #3-'Court' her-don't date, follow God's plan for families-not your own and you will done fine.

    (Keep your hands, lips, feet, ankles, legs, toes, fingers,etc...to yourself until your wedding night. Then unleash your lust for each other! :D) [In private I hope :eek: ]

    ...God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them... And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

    Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. ...Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit.

    For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

    For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. But he that doeth truth cometh to the light, that his deeds may be made manifest, that they are wrought in God.

    This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you. Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

    Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.

    I am the way, the truth and the life.


    Jesus the Christ-Son of the Living God

    The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you all.

    For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.But God commandeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

    With Love,

    Paul-Apostle to the Gentiles
  3. First of all, I'm SO glad to see this! That is super exciting and I'm really happy that both of you guys are taking it slow and getting to know each other.

    Anyways, keep pressing forward. Don't set up any stumbling blocks. Examine your weaknesses and use your weaknesses as boundaries. For example, let's say kissing is a stumbling block for you and it's a weakness. So use it as a boundary. "No kissing until __________." Maybe even being alone is not a good thing for you, so go on group dates. Or if you guys DO feel that it's okay for you to be alone, maybe even make sure you guys are alone in a well-lit spot. Because let's be honest, when you're alone, there's going to be temptations to do things. It's normal. But if you guys truly want to have a Christlike relationship, setting up boundaries is important.

    Keep seeking God in this. I truly am so happy to see this. Not many people who I have talked to follow such guidelines or boundaries, but just figure that if they date, no temptation will ever come their way. When in all reality, temptations will come and if there are no boundaries or guidelines, there's going to be sin.

    And one more thing, respect each other's boundary. Even if it may not be a weakness to you, it still is a weakness to her. Read 1 Corinthians 8, and especially at verse 13: "Therefore, if food makes my brother stumble, I will never eat meat, lest I make my brother stumble." So, let's say she doesn't feel comfortable with holding hands. You shouldn't hold her hand, even though it's not a weakness to you. Because in Romans 14:13 it says, "Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother."
    Rumely likes this.

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