Dealing with friends and family

Discussion in 'Biblical Advices' started by treshay, Nov 6, 2007.

  1. Dealing with friends and family

    I've always been a Christian, but as I've said before, I'm new to truly walking in my Faith. After some recent events I've decided to bring my children up in the Lord, confessing prayers over them and teaching them His ways! But I haven't always been this way. Before, I called myself a Christian - but I gossiped, I didn't go to church, I swore, I dwelled on anger and even passed it on to my children. I used the Lords name in vane and sometimes made jokes that today I would consider blasphemy. That is who my friends and family have come to know. I am having a hard time admitting this but I guess my problem is that I need advice on how to let others know that that is not who I am anymore. The reason it's hard for me is because, I guess I'm worried about what they'll KNOW I'm worried about it. What's crazy is that I really don't care if I lose them as friends if they can't accept the new me, it's just the part where they realize that I've changed that worries me most. I don't want to hurt their feelings, and I don't want to have to get into a debate about my beliefs against someone who has little or no faith at all. Alot of the people I know think that Christians and other religions hide behind the Bible and don't know how to think for themselves. I'm so new to really being a Christian that I don't really know how to argue my case yet either.

    For example, I posted a little blog about the movie The Golden Compass on my website and I got so many people arguing against me saying that I need to read the book to give it a chance before making a judgement based on others opinions. I didn't write it but I so badly wanted to say "You too....try reading the Bible!" I don't feel like I made a powerful argument, I just basically said that I am raising my kids with my values and the plot of killing God goes against all of mine. In addition to the fact that I won't financially support an athiest author. I said alot more but they are all athiests themselves so I guess I offended them by saying that. They also think that people should allow their kids to grow up and make thier own decisions on religion. I just argued that if I don't guide them someone else will and noone will like the outcome.

    I guess I'm getting sidetracked...what's new Ha! What I need advice on is handling my friends and family that don't realize just how much I've changed. I'd really rather just not answer their calls or emails but I know that's not right.
  2. Well leave that up to the Lord... It depends on the friends... If they accept your beliefs and your changes then they are your friends...
    If they mock and redicule you they were never your friends...

    Yes, the Father is with you...
  3. I can't always win arguments. Often times people get the better of me. But I know why I'm a Christian. I'm a Christian because I desire to know God more than anything, and I yearn for more out of this life. All I can do is be honest with myself, and this is where my heart leads me. Jesus' words fill me with hope and peace. Atheists might argue there is insufficient proof for all of this, but that never means that faith is unjustified. Life is a mystery, and one will always be justified in seeking to know and have a close relationship with God, as well as loving and caring for others. Those are Jesus' two great commandments, simple yet extremely powerful. They are the rock in which my faith remains secure.

    I'm sorry if people end up being offended by you or angry at you for what you believe in or how you've changed. I think that if you're like Jesus and still show unconditional love and caring for them, than they will eventually come around and respect you and your beliefs. People are often angry because theyre insecure and afraid of what they don't know, but when they see you're a genuinely nice and caring individual, they'll come around. Good luck with your friends and family:)
  4. For some of your friends & family, just seeing the difference will make them ask questions. Others may have to hear your testimony.

    The biggie is to not deny who you were. Acknowledging it will remind them of how different you are now. Ignoring it will look like hypocrasy.

    Just tell them in laymans terms what has changed for you, and why. Throwing a lot of cliche' Christian speach into it will not help, it may have the opposite effect.

    The danger here is seeming "holier-than-thou" to those who really know you, and what skeletons you have hiding in your personal closet.

    Good luck! Don't be discouraged...remember even Jesus was not believed by his own townspeople.

  5. Beloved: I tried to quote but it didn't copy the part that I have questions about. I guess I'm not understanding what you are saying by "I don't hear the fruits of your salvation in your testimony." I am trying to be careful with my wording because I know how easy it can me to misunderstand tone when words are written and not said but I want to ask if you are saying that you think that I may not truly be saved and that what I am experiencing is a false conversion?

    I am still learning and still very new to this. I believe that we all start out this way. Some of us are blessed with parents that raise us with the Word and some of us aren't. I was just not as blessed, but I am sincerely trying. More than trying, because just trying isn't enough I am giving my life to God and I give my children to Him. What I am experiencing is real, perhaps you can't see or hear that because I am too new to even know how to portray it but that is why I am here, and it is why I go to church and read my Bible...because I have so much to learn.

    I hope my words are read the way they are intended and not as though I think I know more than you - I know that's not true. I am more in a sense asking for more guidance from you rather than you just saying that mine is a false conversion because so far you have not heard the fruits of my testimony.

    I'm going to post this now...after over an hour of trying to word it right, it still comes off the wrong way. I'll just pray that you receive it the way it is intended. God Bless....oh and I love the scriptures you attached about not worrying!!
  6. Oh and I wanted to add...

    At this point I actually don't know if I really am saved or not. I meant to post this as a separate topic but it seems to fit here. I was water baptized years ago at a different church than the one I currently attend. Afterwards a group of women surrounded me and began speaking in tongue and told me that if I didn't not speak in tongue immediately after my baptism than the I have not recieved the Lord and I am not truly saved. Well, I didn't speak in tongue. I am also concerned because at that time in my life I wasn't fully committed to walking with the Lord and I committed alot of sin. So my question is, should I be baptized again? Do I need to be or does one baptism last a lifetime....oh that makes me sound stupid but I really don't know. And, is it true that you MUST speak in tongue in order to be accepted by Christ? If so, how?? Thank you.
  7. This is a false teaching. Not all who are filled with the HS will speak in tongues...

    This is between you & God. Has He asked you to do it?

    No noe can tell you if you're truely saved or not. It is between you & Jesus. Only He knows your heart.
  8. :amen:Oh ! MY Dear sister, you are so right about posting and sometimes not making ourselves understood and the other things you said...

    I'll try to explain more this evening, got to get my walk in, and then comes cooking supper... My husband has the computer for the next few hours, until he falls asleep...

    WHat ever the case the Lord is with you...

    Father Bless you
  9. I've always been a Christian, but as I've said before, I'm new to truly walking in my Faith.

    I write everything in love and i prayed for the Holy Spirit to guide me :) and I believe the Father, Christ , and His Holy Spirit is definitely with you on your path in His Kingdom...

    Could you expound on " I've always been a Christian" before I make a comment, Please?

    After some recent events I've decided to bring my children up in the Lord, confessing prayers over them and teaching them His ways!

    You are very admirable to be doing these blessed things over your children, you have God's Wisdom in these things, my daughter...

    But I haven't always been this way. Before, I called myself a Christian - but I gossiped, I didn't go to church, I swore, I dwelled on anger and even passed it on to my children. I used the Lords name in vane and sometimes made jokes that today I would consider blasphemy.

    The above behaviors are not the Fruits of the Spirit, that doesn't mean you are not saved,

    Just you may not have been Yet filled with your GREATEST FRIEND and HELPER ( The Holy Spirit or Ghost ) to walk the Christian Faith...

    I was one who did the things you speak above, I didn't even know there was a Holy Spirit since I was not raised in any Church...

    It was actually many years later I understood... We cannot live the Christian life without Him, we will fall every time and live in a state of frustration, we always return to our old ways...

    This was probably what was happening to you... Isn't He Wonderful, He never gives up on us, even when we are unfaithful, He is Faithful and lovingly patient...

    About the web site and F/T Conversion... It points out clearly why you need to be saved... Not to improve your lifestyle, but to be saved from the wrath to come to the un=believers...

    Little is spoken of repentence in witnessing to unbelievers..........,

    When most alter calls are made these days, it's basically, Jesus will Improve your Life, Marraige, Family, Finances, and give you life eternal... Plus Peace, Love, lasting Happiness...

    And then the trials and tribulations comes, like you and your family and friends... Many then fall away...

    The whole truth is not given in some Churches, I don't think it on purpose, it's just the way the Churches Culture has deveated from the Whole truth over the years...

    with much love and care, Bless you and your family
  11. Bless you for giving your life to God.
    I truly respect that you are so honest about your past sins.
    I don't mean that one needs to confess to anyone but God, but the fact that you chose to share says alot about your honesty.
    I feel being a Christian is an ongoing lesson throughout life.
    Another important thing~ Your behavior and attitude will speak far more of God in your life than any words ever will, with family and friends.

    But stand your ground.
    If others feel children should choose for themselves, so what.
    You have a right to YOUR beliefs and you stick by them!
    I have my individual beliefs and I know sometimes others assume I think I am holier or better.
    Just as Jesus, I love everyone and want them all saved.
    I don't necessarily 'like' everyone but that is not the same as love.
    Love is about truly caring about one's soul and never wanting any harm to come to them.
    That is Christ's love.

    When you feel convicted over something, such as that book/movie, believe in yourself; there will always be those who disagree and argue, always~

    Put all your faith in God and make pleasing HIM your priority, not friends and family and people online.
    God first!
    You are in my prayers.
    Find your strength in God and seek the Truth and you shall find it~

  13. Ditto Violet, you sure have the Gift of Grace...

    See how much you are needed here:D:israel::):jesus-sign::amen::heart::smile_anim:...

    Has Larry left already?
  15. Thank you, my Dear, and I'm afraid so.....:(

  16. Bless you Dear sister.
    I too have been through much abuse so I fully understand.
    God truly is our only healer, spiritually and mentally and emotionally.
    Take your past and try to help others with your experiences~:)
  17. WOW! I love you Treshay:D... You are one of those very special children of the Lord... I can relate alittle... OK! everyone... I Know every child is special...

    Though as a child I knew no Christians, I would sometimes try to convince my atheist father that their was a God... Somehow in my little brain I knew, like you...
  18. :jesus-cross:

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