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confused college kid

Discussion in 'College and Youth' started by Misunderstood, Nov 30, 2009.

  1. confused college kid

    sooo, my name is daniel and im a college kid and im at a big crossroads in life.
    Its my 4th year in college an i can honestly say, I have no clue where or what road to take...i'm kinda at a cross roads with life and it's priorities. I guess you could call it the great depression of my life. I've had my ups, and don't want to be a debbie downer, but I can honestly say I have never been so confused.
    I know I should pray, handover my worries to god, and let him take the wheel and direct me in my paths, but i got to admit, my faith isn't what it should be.
    College is so tough...i'm a very blunt person, i dont sugar coat anything, so i can only be honest here and say i've done my fair share of partying and it's lead to bad choices, but I'm 22 years old now and i've put all that stuff in the past because i got to stay on the grind of serving and loving jesus. It's been a tough transition, i have lost alot of friends. I'm on the outside looking in with the whole college scene. I don't know where i fit in, i feel like a puzzle piece trying to fit into a slot of a whole other puzzle, no matter how hard i try to make sense of everything, i find myself at square one...lost in the college world.
    The easy way out would be to say, you know what, lets just put the partying shoes back on and walk around...but ive been there...and u wake up with not only a hangover, but emptiness, and no self fullfillment.
    I'm done going down that dead end road, but i have no sense of direction, and i feel like god's not speaking to me, but deep down i know im just not listening.
    I'm to caught up in myself and trying to fix things on my own and control things I can't. I went through a tough break up last year, I dated this girl for nearly 3 years and she was my first love. So, right now Im dealing with the whole, "Im 22 years old...not trying to be single at 45 (not that theres anything wrong with that)...just speaking in generalizations that I want to find love again." But it's like, all girls are either nuts, or, how do i say this in a christain forum...they get around. Girls are worst than guys these days...it's sad. It really is. I've been single since last november, and don't get me wrong, i have went on dates, but none have stuck...i felt god telling me, "she's not right for you right now, or it's not the right time." However, at the same time, it's discouraging.
    So before I bore everyone into a coma, I'm going to end here, thanks in advance for the people who actual took the time to read this, its greatly appreciated. In the mean time, I'm going to try to talk to God and do my best to make sense of this crazy college world.
    god bless
  2. Hey daniel.. it is great to have ya here!
    Well, i can see alot of where your coming from i am 27 and it wasn't to long ago i was in college doing the same stuff... you are right it is full of temptations and poor choices around every turn.. It is hard to be a christian.. i love the LORD and I know u love HIM.. but anyone who says this is easy has a whole different view from me...
    College is hard to begin with also.. but daniel, u have the LORD and you know where you have been is an empty place, you sound very determined and independednt.. which is great, lol i am too, but i think it gets in the way sometimes of us seeking what the LORD's WILL 4 US IS VERSES WHAT WE THINK IT IS.. i know.. As far as the breakup I hate to hear that... but trust me you know that there will be a wonderful women come along that you adore and adore's and understands you and you will be good for each other.. it is getting harder to find a good companion i agree, but i promise there are still lots of good ones out there, you ask the LORD, read ur bible and go to church, pray bro, and HE will give you the desires of your heart.. I hope I have helped at all.. and again it is great to have ya here!
  3. Hey Daniel!
    Name's Katie :) :)

    ^It only takes a little bit of faith for God to do big things. We all struggle here and there with our faith. But as the scripture says, when you are weak, you are strong. This doesn't mean in body strength, it means that God is strong in YOU when you are weak.

    We are going to be outcasters in this world. I don't even know if that's a word, so I do apologize. But we aren't going to fit in with this world. We love Jesus. Even when Jesus was on this earth, HE was hated. He was ridiculued, he was MOCKED.

    I have to tell you, you will never fit into this world once you're so in love with Jesus! And when you are so in love with Him, you won't have a care in the world if you belong. You are HIS. No one can ever love you like God has loved you.

    And about sinning in the past, look, I've done some horrible things as well. I've given myself away in the past because I didn't have a male role-model. So I went to guys and I tried pleasing THEM instead of my Maker. I've made my GOD cry. I broke my Jesus' heart. But once you come back to Him and apologize and repent, Jesus rejoices and he doesn't care WHAT you've done in the past. He just cares for the present. He accepts you. Your imperfections are beautiful to Him.

    He loves you for who you are. But he wants you to become more like HIM. (I got that from Max Lucado! He's a great Christian author).

    Keep falling in love with him, Daniel. You gotta keep at it. Read the Bible, worship God, talk to him. In the beginning, talking to God will be awkward. But once you start falling in love with God, it comes more natural. It doesn't sound like a "prayer." It's more of a conversation!

    Hang in there. Keep pressing into God! He forgives you of the past. Now it's time to forgive yourself :)
  4. Oh, and I love your signature, Daniel! Very true :)
  5. Hi Daniel, all i can say is you're not alone. I too am a college student and I HAVE and STILL struggle in my Christian walk. You feel like sometimes you just don't knwo where to go and you're looking to God for guidance and it can seem like he has left you hanging. I love that you said you felt that you weren't listening, I too have had that experience. God speaks to his children in mysterious ways sometimes. I have struggled with saddness and seeking fufillment in all areas except where I need to. I have struggled and struggle with temptation and confusion and just felt like I was wasting my time frankly, but once I made a smallest choice a smallest choice to turn to God, our Lord Jesus Christ over those other things, God has already shown me where I need to go and is leading me towards him closer and closer. I am learning everyday and still struggle. All I can say is, God does see your heart and sees you trying to do the right thing and he will order your steps. I would highly suggest reading the bible even just a few verses a few times a week can make all the difference. Seek to honor God in every walk of your life, that means when you're socializing with others, when you're alone in your room, when you're eating, do all to honor God and ask him to help you to do this. I will pray for you and myself cause I have difficulty with this as well. Have you read the purpose driven life, i heard its good, maybe you could read it. I will pray for you my brother. God Bless
  6. Hey Daniel,

    I felt a little compelled to write something here because I can really relate to you man. I'm 22 as well and a college student. I have definitely "lived it up" in the college scene for quite some time. I thought it was fun at the time but I know what you mean by it doesn't give you any self-fulfillment in the morning, especially with a hangover.

    With that being said, I now look back at my past and think it was completely dumb and have absolutely no desire to go back to that lifestyle. I only want to please the Lord. By doing this, I need to live in his footsteps. I was just asked yesterday actually, by some of my good friends, if I wanted to go to Mountaineer casino a little south of me. My friends said it would be a great time, we can drink and gamble all day. Now, in my past I would be all over this, but not now. I have no desire to do such things anymore.

    The way you can get like me, so to speak, is by building your relationship with God. I don't know if your university has something like mine, but look into any church offerings on campus. My campus has something called "Campus Focus". This is a sermon given every Thursday night and they also have small group meetings Mon-Wed. I have yet to attend a small group meeting, but I love attending the Thursday night service. Look for ways to get involved and the rest will come naturally.

    Hope that helped man, stay strong.

    And I also wanted to comment to spinning. My devotional bible has Max's works in it :)
  7. hey guys, sorry for the late reply. I just want to say i appreciate all the reply's i am just now reading them. I think where i am at my weakest is in the car on my home from class, work, or jui jitsu...my mind is either my greatest and most powerful asset or at the same time, my worst enemy and ill just get emotional sometimes....and thats usually when i talk to god...
    i do need to read the bible more...i have no excuses. I read it once a week outside of church and i know thats not good enough.
    once again thanks for the reply guys...i have my days where i feel mentally strong and nothing can get me down, then sometimes i get weak. It can be a rollercoaster ride sometimes.
    i appreciate all your responces. it means so much. :)
  8. thanks katie, ur words are a thing of beauty lol.
    um on regard to conversation like prayer...i definatley got that. i talk to god like i talk to my best friend or mom or something...it sounds stupid but i picture him sittin there in the passenger seat...
    lol sometimes i wont be payin attention, a car will pass, and ill be like, "great, that person things im crazy talkin to myself..." so i speed up, get right next to them and pull my phone up to my ear like im talkin on speaker phone!....a desperate attempt to seem halfway sane! hahaha
  9. and as far as purpose driven life i know my mom has it, il have to check it out!
    i wish i could just snap my fingers and have it all figured out. i def feel like an outcast, but ive always been uncommon and been an individual. i am a very big dreamer so im not a stranger to not being "like everyone else". however, i got so use to the boyfriend role for 3 years and its like now what do i do. Ive gone on dates, but only to find college girls are immature and still stuck in the "gotta have a cool reputation, where the cool clothes, and go to the cool parties" stage...girls have no respect for themselves and sleep around with anyone...it blows my mind. So i'm inbetween tryin to find a decent girl and not gettin my butt kicked in college....
    it tough
  10. hahaha, that is indeed amazing! don't worry, people think i'm sometimes insane!

    just remember that God isn't going to walk out on you when you are going through this. last year i was having a hard time with this world and with God. it was pretty bad! i lost a very close friend of mine because of how i was and how i acted! but God never once turned away from me. he was just waiting until i came back into his arms :) :) he's a pretty patient guy, just fyi!!
  11. ANd I suggest holding off on relationships just for now. what you need right now is a stable relationship with God! (i'm not saying that you don't love Jesus or anything. we just need to be stable in HIM before anything else!) it seems that you are already struggling with a lot of things (college, mostly), and looking for a decent girl is just an unnecessary thing right now! just try to focus on one thing at a time :)

    I mean, take a look at your sentence. What's more important? Not getting your butt kicked in college or finding a decent girl? Try focusing on college. Because finding a decent girl is just not something that's as important as college. Ya know?
  12. I agree and thanks for your insight. Just tough bein single, especially all my bros have g/f's so when they are on their leesh and cant go out...it's like, where does daniel go? lol
    that and lets be honest, its comfortable to have that security, but i will focus on finding it more in my relationship with god.
  13. Hi Daniel,
    I had read this thread before I signed up to register, and when I did, I also looked forward to replying to this one:
    I know what you mean! Girls are that way here too. It's ridiculous. They can be just as bad as the boys, too. It's very sad. And I hope you find or figure out what you're trying to do. I know, college can be tough, I'm only in my second year this coming fall.

    Hoping things gets lots better for you! Keep in touch with God. : )

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