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Being spiritually unyoked

Discussion in 'Marriage and Relationships' started by Monet, Jul 26, 2015.

  1. I need some advice, so I was dating a guy for 5 months and even though he is a great man things did not work out because we were not on the same level spiritually. Yes we are both believers who go to church pray and live decent lives however I'm at a place spiritually where I'm trying to flee from sin as oppose to willingly do it. He however is still willing to do sinful things even though he knows it is wrong. When we first met I told him that I wanted to wait till marriage to have sex and he agreed but he was only trying to abstain for me not for himself or for God. This all led to the downfall of our courtship because he failed at abstaining and decided to break things off with me so he can have sex. He knows that what he is doing is wrong but he feels like he has to change and grow on his own pace and that he is not at that place yet, he told me that I deserve better than him someone who can give me what I need and want because right now he is not able to but that we never know what the future holds but that right now he just had to be honest with me about his lusting. I in response just prayed for him and kept it moving but did tell him that we can be friends. My question is what do you do when you meet someone who is not on your level spiritually? Should you just walk away or stay with them and try and help them on their walk even if could result in failure such as this did? Could God have placed him in my life for a reason and therefore should keep my heart open for him? Any advice would be appreciated??
  2. I think you already know the answer....

    If anything be friends at Church (and only meet in Church); but it doesn't sound like this guy is willing to commit to much. Is that the kind of marriage you want?
    Lifeasweknowit likes this.
  3. If you guys are on a completely different level spiritually, don't pursue it.

    Not to say that because a guy struggles more difficulty with something you excel in you should break it off. But if there is a blatant disregard for God's commandments, that's a clear sign he isn't pursuing a strong walk.
    Cturtle, Lifeasweknowit and Monet says Amen and like this.
  4. Thanks! That makes so much sense because if you truly love God and want to live for him you will fight sin as oppose to willingly commit sin so the fact that he is willing to have sex especially when he knows it is wrong is just an outward defiance towards God but question...what should I do if he comes back around and says that he is trying to change and seek God and finally be that man for me?
  5. Well, that's a situation that doesn't really have a direct answer unfortunately.

    I believe that people through God can change, we are all walking testimonies of that. I believe that he can and hopefully will change his ways.

    I am also a believer that you can forgive somebody, but there are always consequences. If he does have a whole hearted change to God, then go for it. But I would not ignore potential guys waiting for him to change.
    Monet likes this.
  6. #7 KingJ, Jul 28, 2015
    Last edited: Jul 28, 2015
    1. The risk for us is always that if someone can't submit to God of the universe... what in the universe makes you think he will ever submit to you?

    2. Ok, so he is leaving you because you are not giving him your body. Sounds like he has amazing love and dedication to you, your kids, your parents, your well being and 70 year future together.

    3. You run. The scripture you are referring to is not referring to 'spiritual levels' among Christians. We either care about what pleases and displeases God ...or we do not.

    2 Cor 6:14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness.

    4. We should help everyone that comes our way. We should only marry those who have a healthy respect and fear for God Phil 2:12.

    5. God and the devil send potentials your way. Scripture says the steps of the righteous are lead by the Lord. Meaning the steps of the unrighteous are not.

    Marriage is God looking out for you.
  7. Thanks! I especially like point 5..if God was directing his steps he would have stayed with me and continued fighting his flesh for Gods glory not just for me but the problem is he is a puppet and the devil has the strings and bcuz hes not fully submitting himself to God the devil is having a field day with him and he is letting him. Thats why I just prayed for him and kept it moving! Hopefully one day he will have a spiritual awakening and began seeking God in his life and turning from his sinful evil ways
    KingJ likes this.
  8. Pray and seek God for the answer to this question. Because only God knows his heart and if he is not the man for you, you don't want to persue the relationship (trust me, i unfortunately learned the hard way).
    John 14:21 is a good verse to keep in your mind and heart.

    Fish Catcher Jim likes this.
  9. Amen for even if he seems to be the cats meow and turns to Christ in a deep way - this still does NOT make him Gods choice for you.
    God Bless
    Cturtle likes this.

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