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All That Worrying for Nothing About the Anesthesia and my Vasectomy

Discussion in 'General Discussions' started by naomanos, Nov 12, 2014.

  1. Well, I just got the call, my county health plan will not cover the procedure anyway. Even though I was told that they would, I was misinformed apparently.

    Now I have to think of something else. I know that my wife, through medicaid would have no issues getting a tubal ligation approved, but she is unwilling to do it and as I have said, has left the birth control completely up to me. Well, I tried, so I don't know what to tell her now.
  2. Have you checked into getting a grant to pay for the procedure?

    Title X (Ten)
    If your income is low and you have no health insurance that covers vasectomy, Federal Title X (Ten) grant money is available in Florida and nationwide to help fund family planning services, including vasectomy. Most if these federal Title X funds are allocated through county health departments. Please see our Guide to Florida Health Department Vasectomy Programs. If you live in a county whose health department has no vasectomy program or no federal funds available for vasectomy, you may apply for financial aid through the health department of a neighboring county. (from this web site - http://vasweb.com/vasectomy.html#Aid
    Silk likes this.
  3. I have looked into that option. Unfortunately because I have the county health insurance, I am ineligible for those funds because I have some sort of health coverage even if they do not cover a certain procedure.

    It really would be so much easier for her to get a tubal approved, but she isn't even willing to consider it.
  4. It would be really unlikely if any insurance company paid for a vasectomy.

    Start a bottle fund. Every time you and the wife plan to go out for dinner, buy bologna and bread instead and put the difference in the bottle. You will be surprised how quickly it all add up.
    Silk and Abdicate say Amen and like this.
  5. That's not really a good idea. We only go out to dinner once a month. If I take that away, my wife will have a fit. She says we do not go out enough as it is.

    I will just pray that she changes her mind about not having the tubal ligation done.
  6. OK....here is another idea.

    Take a 2nd job just for the purpose of making enough money to pay for the procedure.

    A long time ago, I did lawn care for about 6 months just so I could buy an old car. It was a 1957 Chevy and I needed $500.00 but I did not want to take anything away from the budget we had to pay the bills. Boy do I ever wish that I had kept that car.
    Silk likes this.
  7. I do not have a first job, unless being my wife's caregiver and by extension our daughter's as well can be considered a job?
  8. I just want to make sure that those responding realize that I am not trying to be difficult. My responses are based on something I have already tried or are unable to do like Major's suggestion about getting a second job.

    I am leaving it up to God and will wait on what He does or my wife having a change of heart.
  9. Ooops. That of course can be a full time job. My wife and I are doing the very same thing at this point in our lives with my mother so I do understand.
  10. There is a procedure that rednecks use.

    Attached Files:


    You make this suggestion to a guy who fears needles????

    It is hard to take naomanos seriously. He states on another thread that his wife went to legal aid for a divorce. :rolleyes: I don't think his wife and he are on the same page and it doesn't look like he is really looking for advice.
  12. #12 naomanos, Nov 13, 2014
    Last edited: Nov 13, 2014
    You can take me as seriously as you want. Yes, she called legal aid, but luckily at least for me they are closed till the 20th of January.

    Even if she did get a hold of legal aid, the vasectomy was still an issue for me. Because of I were to be divorced, which would be against my will because I would not never say yes, then there is always a chance however slim it might seem, that I would get married again or there could be reconciliation between my wife and I.

    This thread is not looking for advice, rather it was me stating that I worried myself for nothing since I am unable to do the vasectomy anyway.

    You are correct in one thing though, my wife and I generally are not on the same page.

    Edit: last night I prayed that my wife has a change of heart about our marriage, that we stay together and for her to realize that she really does need me. Starting at about 2:30 this morning she became really sick with nausea and vomiting. So today she has resulted in me to really wait on her and to make decisions regarding our daughter on my own (or daughter has had diarrhea for the past two days).

    I believe my prayer was answered.
  13. I dunno naomanos, you have a child on the way, marital discord, no job, and apparently have much to be depressed about. I will pray for you but I suggest you are letting carnal thoughts distract you.
    Abdicate likes this.
  14. I have no job because I am my wife's caregiver. Cannot have a job if I am her caregiver. So there is a reason why I do not have a job. That does not contribute to my depression in the least. Just being a caregiver however really ups my chances of having depression, especially when my spouse has depression. See it's not just her living with multiple sclerosis, but me as well because I deal with her symptoms as she is dealing with them.

    What carnal thoughts exactly do you think are distracting me?
  15. I came back to the thread to answer your question and only just read the edit. I think all prayers are answered - just not always as we hoped. What I meant by "carnal" distractions was that you were focusing on the flesh and the world and not allowing the spiritual to lead you. I was unaware until you posted that your wife has ms along with her pregnancy and adds more complications, some of which can be life threatening. So the answers to your prayer is that her health worsens so she will realize she needs you? You seem to feel that you are the partner in the "right" here and I would suggest you play "devil's advocate" with yourself and maybe see what you are doing that has contributed to where you are at now and what you are doing to make that situation/environment to continue. Leave the blame of others out of your consideration, so you can actually see what you can do to change it.
  16. According to my counselor when I was seeing one earlier this year for my depression is that I have made all the changes that I needed to make for my part in the marriage, however if my wife doesn't respond to those changes I will have to come to the realization that she will not change and my marriage will not get better than where it stands at this point in time.

    So I have left out the blame of others and am only starting what is factual in my marriage. I have taken responsibility for my part in where we are at currently in our marriage. I have made the necessary changes. My mother-in-law can attest to that and has said as much. She had even statef that her daughter doesn't make living with her easy at all, since much of what she does to me she also does to get mom as well as my mom whenever we go to her home for dinner.

    On a good note, we will be getting couples counseling through the county's healthy families program. Our case worker visited us today and asked what services we would like and the first thing out of my mouth was couples counseling. I explained why, my wife added to the explination and decided we needed that first and foremost as well as as asap.
  17. The last sentence should say that it was decided that couples counseling was needed first and foremost and asap.

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