Discussion in 'Bible Study' started by 3nails+1cross=4GIVEN, Apr 2, 2009.

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  1. adultery?

    Why does marrying a divorced woman equate to committing adultery?
  2. I don't understand.
    If that the case then that means my now hubby has commiited adultry?

    I was married for 10 years previous in which my ex husband decided drugs and strippers were more important that his godly wife and children. I stuck the marriage out, went to our assistant pastor for counselling for 4 years, prayed and stayed faithful. He still chose those things and wanted a divorce.
  3. The reason it is considered Adultry is because of the very nature of marriage:

    There is only one thing which can lawfully allow a divorce and that is Adultry. 2 Christians are still concidered married if they divorce for any other reason. Thus, if you marry a Christian who was divorced for any reason other then Adultry, you are marrying someone who is already married in the eyes of God.

    1Co 7:13 And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
    1Co 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
    1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

    I think by the words of 1Corinthians your current marriage is fine. But I'm no trained guy or anything.
  4. Now I'm even more confused :X
    does that mean that it's okay to be together with unbelievers? or does it just mean that if you're married to an unbeliever,you still can stick it out through God's grace?
  5. To be honest I'm not 100% sure.

    All I can go by is:
    1Co 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.

    Which to me means that if one is married to an unbeliever, they can bring that person closer to God. Through example and giving them a personal example of His love and power.

    Perhaps someone more studied can help better.
  6. Please read Mathew 19:1-12 and Mark 10:1-12

    In the account from Mathew includes the phrase “for any and every reason” while Mark omits it. There where two Jewish schools, one the Shammai, taught that divorce was allowed only in the case of unfaithfulness. The other school, the Hillel, taught that divorce could happen for any reason.
    Mark records Jesus as saying that if one gets divorced and remarries, then they commit adultery against her. Mathew adds an exception clause that says “except for marital unfaithfulness” but leaves out “against her”. Mathew records Jesus as addressing the disciples; Mark records Jesus as addressing the Pharisees.
    There are no contradictory statements made here. Mark portrays Jesus’ condemnation of divorce in more absolute terms than Mathew. It is the same event, just recorded differently in the eyes of the authors. Jesus quoted Genesis 1-2 and Deuteronomy 24. Jesus standards for divorce are exceptionally high and basically condemned it; He had higher standards than both the schools of Jewish law.

    I know a few christians who have remarried after divorce, are they living within Gods will? I cannot say, only they know if their relationship honours God. All I know is we serve a God who forgives but we still need to fear Him and obey Him.

    Bottom line is that God instituted marriage as a divine ordinance, due to sin, marriage has been attacked severely. Jesus obviously condemned divorce and the church should teach the same.
  7. Your ex commited adultery in they eyes of God just by going to strippers etc. You did not just bail out of the marriage and you did what any God fearing person should do and went to counseling by a Christian who knows about these things for Godly advice.

    Like I said in my previous post, we serve a Loving and forgiving God who covers our sins and intercedes on our behalf.

    May God bless you!
  8. I thought I would just pull a couple of random questions and share some thoughts-

    Why does marrying a divorced woman equate to committing adultery?

    Gen 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
    Marriage has a spiritual aspect that is not easily broken.
    Most ministers would simply tell you to wait until the other person gets involved so that they are the ones breaking the covenant.
    does that mean that it's okay to be together with unbelievers?
    There is a scriptural admonition to not do that- however some get saved after already being married and others simply do not obey.

    Here is something to dwell on- God will meet you wherever you are. He will forgive you and is willing to go on- this is evidenced by the fact He sent His Son to the cross for you with full knowledge of where you would be right now. We love God and want to obey His Word, we also understand that His mercy are abundant.

    As a friend of mine recently pointed out God Himself is a divorcee:
    Jer 3:8 And I saw, when for all the causes whereby backsliding Israel committed adultery I had put her away, and given her a bill of divorce; yet her treacherous sister Judah feared not, but went and played the harlot also.
  9. Great responses. I have to say that I struggled extremely hard with this when my ex wanted the divorce. I struggled --for a short amount of time-- with why would God let this happen although I have checked my own heart, did everything I could possibly do to salvage the marriage. Even forgiving my ex husband for the repeat behavior for 4 years.

    I believe that when a man or a woman commits adultry and does not repent, but continues in those ways, then the marriage covenent is broken. I no longer am bound to him physically or spiritually except that I am to love my neighbor.

    I am now re-married going on 2 years but known my hubby for 4 years. My husband is a believer. :) My ex has spent the last 4 years in jail for drug trafficking. I believe strongly that the divorce happened for a reason and at the time that it did. For mine and my childrens protection. I cannot go into detail about that, but trust me, I see now that if I would have not signed that divorce paper there is no telling what would have happened.
  10. Rebellious ex's matter to God too

    No special insight claimed here of course, but God loves your ex-husband too. Perhaps He is using the experience of prison to get your ex's attention and draw him to Himself. It's possible that your signing the divorce papers and all that followed will turn out to be a turning point for him too.

  11. I definately agree with you. It has taken some shakin -so to speak- for his eyes to be opened. My ex grew up in the old pentecostal --you don't to do this you don't do that you will love God or you burn in hell -kinda raising. That's not love. It was dictatorship.
    I could tell he struggled alot with walking with God and keeping on the straight and narrow. He gave in and drugs took over.

    Now that he has been in jail for 4 years, his letters he writes are very different from when he first was there. At first it was an unrealistic view of God and was still abraisive and writings were somewhat inappropriate for the kids to see. Now, his letters are heart felt, repentful and loving to his children. He writes regularly and corresponds with me about future reconnection with his children. Before he was demanding and full of unfulfilled promises. He realizes the times that we arranged for him to see the kids and he never showed up was hurtful for the kids. Now he agrees with my views on starting off slow when he gets out of jail.

    Time will tell and be the true test if he allowed God to purge his heart. I am more than willing to oblige and yet still stay alert for my kids sake.
  12. This is a very sensitive subject so I would like to begin with prayer.

    Almighty God above we give you thanks for providing us with Your Holy Word that we may learn and come to love one another as you love us, forgive us our transgressions, guide and protect us in our walk, and lead us to know that salvation is not of our own doing, but by the body and blood of Thine only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior.

    That is abandonment, he divorced you as soon as your marriage took a back seat to something else. You went above and beyond in doing everything you could do to save that marriage. Good for you.

    I think we want to be clear that we do not confuse the law of the state with the law of God.
    Here in America, in many states, adultery is not illegal. So adultery does not constitute divorce or punishment. In others it does, but as far as the bible is concerned, if I were to turn to strippers, drugs, even place my job above my marriage, then I have abandoned my wife, and have divorced her.

    (What I am saying is that the little slip of paper the divorce lawyers hand you is not the divorce. The real divorce happened before that.)

    I remember, we had a President not too long ago. Who uh, …who had His own definition of Adultery. In fact He had his own dictionary, with his definitions of what “IS” means, and perjury, and all sorts of other things.

    By his standards, he had done nothing wrong, but by my standards, he had committed adultery, and he had lied about it in a court of law.

    But because he was using his standards, and not mine, he saw himself as righteous. And so did the law of the land.

    Now, what happens if I turn that same mirror in on myself?

    It isn’t like I’ve ever committed Murder, or Adultery. Or have I?

    Remember we’re using Gods standards, not mine.

    Gods standards: (Mt 5:27-28) "You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.' (28) But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

    Ohhh! Uh Oh. :eek:

    But I’ve never committed murder,

    By my own standards,…..However by Gods…

    1st John 3:15 Anyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life in him.

    It’s a good thing we’re not saved by works. :)

    So, why would God give us laws like these? If,…. the thought,… of lust, is adultery by Gods Standards, and He sees Hate as the same thing as murder, who could ever live up to that standard of perfection?

    God gave us the Law, to keep us close to Him, until Jesus comes back.

    The law is necessary, the law is important, but it isn’t the Law that saves.

    You see, the only one, who can keep the law, perfectly, is Jesus.
    But that doesn’t mean we do away with the Law.
    As our Lord said, I have not come to abolish the law, but to fulfill it.

    Do you see what He meant by that? He knows that we can’t fulfill it perfectly, He came to do that for us, …

    But through our adherence to the law, we stay on the narrow way, we in fact show our love for Christ by keeping His law!

    The law keeps good order, and shows us our sin, like a mirror, but the "POWER" to keep the law, is not from you or I, it comes from the Gospel alone.
    Psalm 119:9
    Psalm 119:105
    1 John 4:9-11

    And most especially Luke 10:27 :)

    This thread has been well discussed. Everyone has stated their views and no one is changing their minds.

    With that in mind, it is the opinion of the Moderators, nothing further is to be gained and the thread will be closed.

    If anyone wishes to add something to this thread that is of a differing viewpoint and has not already been covered, please let anyone on the Moderator Team know, and reopening of this thread will be considered.

    We thank all who participated.
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