A sign of the times

  • Thread starter Boanerges(Inactive)
  • Start date
If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.
 
Happiness is a voyage, not a destination,


there is no better time to be happy thanNOW.......


Live and enjoy the moment
 
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The best exercise is stooping down to help someone less fortunate then yourself.
 
Bro. Larry, .... You wanted some church signs.



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[FONT=arial,helvetica] Church Signs[/FONT]
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1) Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!

2) Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.
3) Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!
4) An ad for a Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, "For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.
5) When the restaurant next to the Church put out a big sign that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own message: "We are open on Sundays, too."
6) Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons -- come hear one!
7) Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!
8) Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.
9) Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.
10) If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.

Awesome! I love these! :goodpost:
 
I saw a billboard that I thought was the greatest thing ever. it read: "If you must curse, use your own name -God " there was no company name on it or anything. Sadly it has been replaced with a car dealership ad. But I will always remember that billboard
 
LOL

I love these...made me want to see more, so I googled it.

"You should come - it's not that bad!"

"Celibate Christmas with us!"

"Godisnowhere...now read it again."

"God loves you whether you like it or not!"

"Our church is like fudge...sweet with a few nuts."

"The sign maker is on vacation, so if you want a message come inside!"

"If you're too open-minded, your brains fall out."

"God loves you and he approved this message."

"What a good church used to be - we still are."

"Please return the laptop."

"No man has ever been shot while doing the dishes."

"Read the bible - it'll scare the hell out of you!"

"Church parking only - trespassers will be baptized!!!"

"Two great truths - there is a God; you're not Him!"

"Humbly Grateful? Or Grumbly Hateful?"

"God will accept broken hearts...but you have to give him all the pieces."

"Souled out."

"You won't be too busy to die."

"Pray for a good harvest...but continue to hoe."

"Stop-drop-roll doesn't work in hell."

"It's hard to stumble when you're down on your knees."

"God expects spiritual fruit - not religious nuts."

"TGIF - Thank God I'm Forgiven."

"Forgive your enemies - it messes with their heads."

"God so loved the world that He did not send a committee."

"Some assembly required."

"Salvation guaranteed - or your sins cheerfully refunded!"

"Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity."

"Jesus loves you. Bush doesn't."

"Christians keep the faith! But not from others!"

"God doesn't believe in atheists either - so they don't exist!"

"Body-piercing saved my life."

"Staying in bed and shouting Oh God! doesn't count as going to church."

"Walmart is not the only saving place."

"For all you do - His blood's for you."

"What's missing from ch rch? U R!"

"Exposure to the Son may prevent burning."
 
“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.”
“It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters, in the end.”
“It takes no more time to see the good side of life than it takes to see the bad.”
“Snowflakes are one of nature’s most fragile things but look what they do when God stick's them together.”
 
Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.

I always turn to the sports section first. The sports page records people's accomplishments; the front page has nothing but man's failures.
 
Love many, trust few but always paddle your own canoe
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person
 
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