Faithwoman

Is that why they say Men are From Mars and Women are from Venus....

slavetoChrist

yeah.. and it also affects the way we talk here.

__________________
we know the way!
we speak the truth!
we live the life!
cause He's the Lord!

ExCordeChristi

I was dating a Muslim who knew nothing about his faith for 8 months. It was absolutely torture because he kept pushing me into greater and greater sins until I finally got so fed up with it, I wasn't in love with him anymore, and I broke up with him. I am no longer angry about what he forced me to do, partially because I know it was my fault I didn't have the courage to say no until I broke up with him, and also partially because God has forgiven me of those sins. I would say from experience, dating outside the doors of the Church is a BAD idea.

I consider marriage to be something sacred; the graces given by God are given because marriage is difficult, and therefore needs God's graces in order to even work. The couple must depend on Jesus. If not, the marriage will collapse. There is always room for forgiveness, but it is difficult to heal a broken relationship, especially one so intimately connected as marriage. This is why I am going to pick my husband with extreme caution. I believe marriage is a lifelong covenant, and I do not want to be unevenly yoked. The divorce rate is at 50% and I don't want to add to the statistic someday. Only the man who loves Jesus more than life itself, more than mankind, could possibly be my husband.

I have yet to meet anyone like that, but I hope in Jesus, and if it should be God's will I should be married, I'll find that man.

1smle2dmpls

But if the husband or wife who isn't a Christian insists on leaving, let them go. In such cases the Christian husband or wife is not required to stay with them, for God wants his children to live in peace.)




What does it mean that if an unbeliever leaves then you are not required to stay with them? Does leave mean divorce? or leave to live somewhere else?

BreathOfGod

Some churches interpret it to mean that divorce is allowable in these circumstances..... (some churches interpret it only to imply a separation). The churches I have been in use that scripture as an acceptable grounds for a divorce. If a spouse is a non-believer and wants the divorce, then the Christian spouse should allow the non-believing spouse to leave and get the divorce..... but on the other hand, the Bible says that if the non-believing spouse wants to stay in the marriage then the Christian spouse must stay.

Often churches allow for divorce in three cases:
1) infidelity (as stated in the Bible)
2) the case listed above-- a non-believing spouse who leaves the marriage
3) abuse (not stated in the Bible)

1smle2dmpls

Thanks for the clarification!! I'm not living with my husband, but I dont want him think he can divorce me if I'm not living with him. What if someone needs their space to regroup? Is it that bad? I'm a faithful woman, I was just overwhelmed with things that still didn't improve in our marriage. Sometimes people mature when they aren't living with their partner. I dont plan on that happening all the time, that's for sure. I relied on a person from church to explain my curcumstances to her and before you know it 3 other people knew! So I dont trust that person anymore, and she was my oulit. Now I can't talk to anyone but I at least can on this site!!

BreathOfGod

Personally, I don't think that a separation with the intent of working on a relationship, is a bad thing. Provided that the goal of the separation really is to work on issues in the marriage. Most of the time people separate more as a trial period for divorce-- seeing if they can make a go of things on their own. But if your intentions are right, then I don't see a problem with it.

1 Corinthians 7:10-11 says "10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife."

Are you and he seeking any type of marital counseling (either together or separate)? You don't have to answer that. I was only asking because it is something that you both may want to consider if you really do have intentions of working on your marriage. I do know that some marriage counselors will not see couples unless they are living together under the same roof, because the couples need to be together in order to work through problems together. You could also go to your pastor about it.

1smle2dmpls

Thanks for your advice BreathofGod. We've met with two pastors from the church but it didn't help. It seemed like they would make sure you tithed and were on top of it rather than returning a phone call. I want to go to another church, but my husband is staying there not matter what, i believe its because his family goes there. I guess I'll keep trying at the same church, when I get back. I want to stay married, I'm just happy I'm not overwhelmed living over there. Even though I love him and miss him I'm happier here but he wants to stay over there. Even if I dont want to. I dont know what God has planned for us. I know his family is looking at me like I'm a bad wife for not being by my husband's side but I've tried talking to him and know its to the point where the t.v. comes before fixing the marriage. So that's why I'm here. Now he can watch all the t.v. he wants without me being there. It's only been a month since I left and nothing has really improved. I just feel that he's getting bad ideas and being more stubborn because of his family. I pray that one day we can be alone again like we use to. Sometimes having family around isn't the best thing at certain times of your marriage. Mine is in California, while his is in Texas.

BreathOfGod

I have attended a couple of churches like you describe...... more interested in if members tithe than in helping them. It always bothered me. Jesus served others and asked for nothing in return..... he commanded Peter to "feed his sheep" not to collect their money......I could go on, but it always bothered me when I have been at churches that refuse to help or offer services to anyone unless that person is a "tithing member."

I'll keep you in my prayers.