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06-19-2008, 06:10 PM
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#471 | ||
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12  |
As a young minister in Kentucky, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave-side service for a homeless man, who had no family or friends. The funeral was to be held at a new cemetery way back in the country, and this man would be the first to be buried there. > > I was not familiar with the backwoods area, and I soon became lost. Being a typical man, I did not stop to ask for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. > I saw the backhoe and the open grave, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. The digging crew was eating lunch. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness, and I stepped to the side of the open grave. There I saw the vault lid already in place. I assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, as I told them that this was the proper thing to do. > The workers gathered around the grave and stood silently, as I began to pour out my heart and soul. As I preached about 'looking forward to a brighter tomorrow' and 'the glory that is to come,' the workers began to say 'Amen,' 'Praise the Lord,' and 'Glory!' The fervor of these men truly inspired me. So, I preached and I preached like I had never preached before, all the way from Genesis to Revelations. > I finally closed the lengthy service with a prayer, thanked the men, and walked to my car As I was opening the door and taking off my coat, I heard one of the workers say to another, 'I ain't NEVER seen nothin' like that before, and I've been puttin' in septic tanks for thirty years!'
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 Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-19-2008, 08:33 PM
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#472 | ||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
I was walking past the mental hospital the other day, and all the patients were shouting, '13....13....13' !
The fence was too high to see over, but I saw a little gap in the fence and looked through to see what was going on. Some idiot poked me in the eye with a stick. Then they all started shouting '14....14....14' !
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Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-19-2008, 08:35 PM
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#473 | ||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
Tea time One day my mother was out and my dad was in charge
>of me. I was maybe 2 1/2 years old and had just >recovered from an accident. Someone had given me a >little 'tea set' as a get-well gift and it was one of my favourite toys. > >Daddy was in the living room engrossed in the evening >news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea', >which was just water. After several cups of tea and >lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Mom came home. > >My Dad made her wait in the living room to watch me >bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the >cutest thing!' > >My Mom waited, and sure enough, here I came down >the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy and she watched >him drink it up. > >Then she said, (as only a mother would know...  >'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she >can reach to get water is the toilet?' > >
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Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-19-2008, 08:57 PM
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#474 | ||
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Dusty I feel like I'm being a bully. XD
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Luke 15:31 - And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. Joel 2:28 - I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions. Matthew 7:7 - Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. Psalms 126:5 - Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy. JOKE POLICE 
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06-19-2008, 09:25 PM
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#475 | ||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
 Joke police, just doing his job. Don't put me in jail. I'll try to be good . He he .You are not a bully, Mark..... I still love you.... 
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Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-20-2008, 01:36 AM
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#476 | ||
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Senior Member
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um,the last two were repeats right? o_O
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You just don't forget the dead.. Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.  http://devoted-to-the-most-high.blogspot.com/ If God is the DJ, then Life is the dance floor, Love is the Rhythm, and You are the music. 
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06-20-2008, 09:05 AM
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#477 | ||
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Senior Member
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Whosoever may torment you,
harass you, confound you, or upset you, is a teacher. Not because they're wise,but because you seek to become so.
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You just don't forget the dead.. Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous. http://devoted-to-the-most-high.blogspot.com/ If God is the DJ, then Life is the dance floor, Love is the Rhythm, and You are the music.
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06-20-2008, 02:37 PM
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#478 | |||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
Quote:
 Thanks goodnes I have the joke police . Do I have another chance..... Ha ha. ? Please please ..... I'll try to be good ? 
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Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-20-2008, 02:39 PM
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#479 | ||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
This is not me It is just a joke
"Bad habit" Most of us have a bad habit we are constantly trying to break. For me, it’s biting my fingernails. One day I told my husband about my latest solution: press-on nails. "Great idea, Honey," he smiled. "You can eat them straight out of the box."
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Faith makes a ChristianTrials prove a Christian Love confirms a Christian But death crowns a Christian |
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06-20-2008, 02:44 PM
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#480 | |||
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10,076
Rep Power: 12 |
Quote:
Nice , thanks
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