Psalm91

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A day without giving is a day without love.....

Fletch

A loving couple wanted a child for the longest time. After years of trying, they finally conceived and a child was born to them. Unfortunately, the child had a birth defect, in that he had no arms, no legs -- in fact, he had no body! Only a head. The couple loved their child anyway, and lavished upon him all their love and affection.

Several years later, their family doctor tells them that head transplant surgery has become a reality. "Finally," the doctor tells them, "Your son can have the body he's always needed. We have a body donor ready for him, so bring him in immediately!"

So the couple rushes home and excitedly tells their son, "We have a wonderful surprise for you!"

To which the son replies, "Oh no. Not another hat!"

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Cast your cares on the LORD
and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous fall.

- Psalms 55:22

Dusty

Haiku Computer Error Messages"



Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

The Web site you seek
Cannot be located, but
Countless more exist.

Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.

Order shall return.
Program aborting:

Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.

Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.

First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.

With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:

"My Novel" not found.
The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao-until

You bring fresh toner.
Stay the patient course.

Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.

A crash reduces
Your expensive computer

To a simple stone.
Three things are certain:

Death, taxes and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.

This page is not here.
Out of memory.

We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

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Dusty

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smellycat

best joke i seen in a while dusty.and so true for the future.

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1. GOOD BAD SALVATION

Boanerges

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“Neither skill nor knowledge is needed to go to God, all that is necessary is a heart dedicated entirely and solely to Him out of love for Him above all others.”
Brother Lawrence

Dusty

"Summer vacation"



Summer vacation was over and the teacher asked Little Rodney about his family vacation.
"We visited my grandmother in Minneapolis, Minnesota."
The teacher asked, "Good, can you tell the class how you spell that?"
Little Rodney replied, "My mistake. Actually, she lives in Ohio."

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Dusty

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Dusty

If Only Life Was Like A Computer!"

If you messed up your life, you could press "Alt, Ctrl, Delete" and start all over!
To get your daily exercise, just click on "run."
If you needed a break from life, click on "suspend."
Hit "any key" to continue life when ready.
To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.
To "add/remove" someone in your life, click settings and control panel.
To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.
When you lose your car keys, click on "find."
"Help" with the chores is just a click away.
You wouldn't need auto insurance. You'd use your diskette to recover from a crash.
We could click on "send" and the kids would go to bed immediately.
To feel like a new person, click on "refresh."
Click on "close" to shut up the kids and spouse.
To undo a mistake, click on "back."
Is your wardrobe getting old? Click "update."
If you don't like cleaning the litter box, click on "delete."

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Dusty

"Dear Dogs and Cats,"



When I say to move, it means to go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help, because I fall faster than you can run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort. Look at videos of dogs and cats sleeping, they can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is nothing but sarcasm.
My compact discs are not miniature Frisbees.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. When I exit this room, I will come out the the same door I entered. In addition, I have been using bathrooms for years. Canine attendance has never been necessary.
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dogs' butt. I cannot stress this enough. It would be such a simple change for you.
In return for your following these simple rules, I have posted the following message on our front door:


Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and Like to Complain About Our Pets:
They live here. You don't.
If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture.
I like my pet a lot better than I like most people.
To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
Dogs and cats are better than kids. They eat less, don't ask for money all the time, are easier to train, usually come when called, never drive your car, don't hang out with drug-using friends, don't smoke or drink, don't worry about buying the latest fashions, don't wear your clothes, don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and if they get pregnant, you can sell the results.

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