Tyler1

Men Are Happy People--

What do you expect from such
simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all
yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is
just another snack. You can be President. You can never be
pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You
can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the
truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to
another gas station restroom because this one is just too
icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a
nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at
your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut,
blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know
stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one
suitcase You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit
for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to
invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes
are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in
public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color. The same
hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to
shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair
of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no
matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a
pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a
mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24
in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.

Boanerges

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“Neither skill nor knowledge is needed to go to God, all that is necessary is a heart dedicated entirely and solely to Him out of love for Him above all others.”
Brother Lawrence

Whirlwind

LOL...I was gonna say, hee hee.

Why SOME men are so happy.

Not all men do the things listed above. I have about 10 pairs of shoes (most of them running shoes). I never talk on the phone, I don't like it, will not...so a conversation doesn't last me more than 10 seconds. The world is not my urinal.

I know it's humor...but still. Not all men think/behave that way.

__________________
Chapter-by-Chapter, verse-by-verse.
Jesus is the Living Word.

Dusty

Hey ..... Guys .... I have to add my two cents though...... You guys on the whole have it good. No kidding.


They forgot the channel surfer who has control of the TV clicker. He he !!!!!

__________________

Boanerges

That is one of my favorites and it drives my wife crazy!

__________________
“Neither skill nor knowledge is needed to go to God, all that is necessary is a heart dedicated entirely and solely to Him out of love for Him above all others.”
Brother Lawrence

Mark_18

Chocolate is just another snack? Yea, right. I ate too much chocolate today, and tomorrow I'll have a new pimple and be 200 situps further from revealing my abs.

To compensate I'm going to drink lots of water tonight, do situps, and go for a long bike ride.

Hey my nails finally grew long enough that I now understand why the ladies make a big deal of breaking a nail. It is a big deal when you break off like 1/2 an inch of nail! It was more like 1/4" but w/e.

I am happy about not having to give birth though

Then again that's a real blessing. It can't hurt that much...

*Hides under desk*

__________________
Luke 15:31 - And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.
Joel 2:28 - I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions.
Matthew 7:7 - Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

Psalms 126:5 - Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.

JOKE POLICE

Dusty

Yah Mark ..... You better hide under your desk...... Ha ha

__________________

Whirlwind

Sophia (on Golden Girls): You try squeezing a watermelon out of your nostril and let me know how you feel!

__________________
Chapter-by-Chapter, verse-by-verse.
Jesus is the Living Word.

Dusty

__________________

Mark_18

I was kidding, don't hurt me>

Wow that picture is nice and clear, and my monitor is so awesome I thought the sand in the middle was on my monitor, I went to wipe it off.

__________________
Luke 15:31 - And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine.
Joel 2:28 - I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your old men will dream dreams, your young men will see visions.
Matthew 7:7 - Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.

Psalms 126:5 - Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.

JOKE POLICE