Christian Forum Site  

Go Back   Christian Forum Site > Entertainment > Humor

Humor Jokes and Humor.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-08-2008, 08:21 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
Who am I's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,373
Blog Entries: 1
Rep Power: 3 Who am I is on a distinguished road
Default Do you have sons?

I got this in my email. I thought it was kind of cute. I don’t believe the waterbed thing though. I did the math. The waterbed would have to be 13 feet deep. I believe that was an exaggeration.


And you also find out interesting things when you have sons, like ...

1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3. A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.

4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tie d to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.

5. You should not throw baseballs up! when the ceiling fan is on . When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6. The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.

7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.

8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9. A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old Man says they can only do it in the movies.

10. Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4- year old Boy.

11. Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12. Super glue is forever.

13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can't walk on water.

14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15. VCR's do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.

16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.

18. You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

20. The fire department in Austin , TX has a 5-minute response time.

21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22. It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23. Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.



24. 80% of women will pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without kids.


25. 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.


And the break fluid thing. I tried that years ago with powdered chlorine for swimming pools. It will smoke and then spontaneously combust. It was pretty cool.





__________________
Blessings to all

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD,
thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Who am I is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2008, 03:58 AM   #2
Senior Member
 
Rumely's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Lakeville, Minnesnowta
Posts: 398
Blog Entries: 2
Rep Power: 2 Rumely is on a distinguished road
Default

Good thing my friends and I didn't know about that in our youth. As it was, we are probably lucky none of us suffered severe burns given our fascination with and penchant for playing with gasoline and fire. And bees.
Rumely is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2008, 04:20 AM   #3
Senior Member
 
GrannyG's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: NC
Posts: 337
Rep Power: 1 GrannyG is on a distinguished road
Default

I had 2 boys and I don't believe that got into this much stuff, but they did do things and their 3 sisters were right there with them. If it could be nailed together, taken apart, investigated, jumped from, climbed to....... well, you get the idea.
__________________
Draw me my Saviour, How precious Thou Art!

Success is not always measured by acceptance.
Success is also measure by completion and endurance.
GrannyG is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2008, 05:11 AM   #4
Senior Member
 
Who am I's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,373
Blog Entries: 1
Rep Power: 3 Who am I is on a distinguished road
Default

"If it could be nailed together, taken apart, investigated, jumped from, climbed to....... well, you get the idea."




That's what I did!!!... MOM?... Is that really you?
__________________
Blessings to all

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD,
thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Who am I is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2008, 07:28 AM   #5
Former Member
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: England
Posts: 8,175
Blog Entries: 13
Rep Power: 0 violet is on a distinguished road
Default

......and I was blessed with five of them!!!

violet is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-17-2008, 07:57 AM   #6
Jax
 
Jax's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Nr London
Posts: 1,283
Rep Power: 3 Jax is on a distinguished road
Default

And me six !!!

My number two son got a brand new bicycle for his eighth birthday.
About half an hour after he had gone outside to 'ride it',
we found him on the front garden with a spanner and a pile of bike bits!
I joke not.
Im not sure if it ever went back together right.
Jax is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On
Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:03 PM.


The CFS logo is Copyright © of the Christian Forum Site. Hosted by LogicWeb.
Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.7.2, Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.2.0 Cliparts by ChristArt. Monitored by Site Uptime.
privacy certified