Im afraid! Im scared of the consequences, but im in far too deep! The way out was a long way back, and i have missed it! Things are getting worse and dont look like they are ever going to get better, who would of thought a relationship could get so bad?!
And what worse person to have a bad relationship with than your own dad?
And how do you deal with things like this?? Normally your dad is the one to give you advice, yet hes the one you need advice on!. Asking/talking to him seems to be out of the picture.. there is no way he is going to talk with me!
In fact it is advice this whole problem started.. Or maybe the lack of it.
Im now 17, almost 18, and i dont remember ever getting advice or learning from him about anything!! All i remember is getting told off for doing things wrong!! Always wrong!.....
How can i live like this?? Who taught me to shave? Me!.. plus trial and error Who taught me to ride a bike? My kindy teachers! Who taught me by example? Well that really depends on what.. but the only example i get from him is hypocritical!! He never taught me to play an instrument. he never taught me a sport. he never drew pictures with me. he never was interested in anything i did.. Unless i accidentally did it wrong and then i got yelled at!!
If i did ever do something right he would pretend to not notice.. or maybe he didnt...
I got a massive addiction to porn after attending school, and hearing about something called sex.. never in my sheltered life had i heard of it! So in that respect he did good at sheltering me.. But is shelter something that is going to help me later on in life?
I had nightmares and was sleepless for about a week after hearing from the youth pastor about demons.. He did a thorough research in the subject and even showed us pictures of possessed people and what they looked like before the possession.. and made out they had more power than they do.. but this was the first time i had heard of such a thing and it freaked me out!!
ALSO to add to this situation I know Christians should serve and have the attitude of a servant.. But is waiting on someones beck and call the answer to this??
If you watch little house and the prarie the girls had duties which they did and then the rest was up to them.. But in my house I do duties as well as run around for both my parents.. (me) do this, (me) do that! (me) why didnt you do that? (I was busy doing that other job for the other parent) I dont want to listen to your excuses really!! Just hurry up and do it!!..
I can act pretty good!! I can hang around girls prettending my mind is not drifting and they dont seem to notice!
I can act pretty good!! I can go to church with a smile on my face and pretend that i love my life and that everything is going well!
I can act pretty good!! I can stay in a big group of people such as a camp and last a week and make out i dont need time alone (introvert)
I can act pretty good!! I can be strong and make out that i can handle it!
But this is no act!! I am really struggling..!! It may seem like nothing from your side, or it may seem out of your grasp of advice? Or maybe you dont want to get involved and you dont think it is right for me to talk about my dad like this behind his back...
I have tried more than once to talk to him, but he then (stroppies around).
And he then makes me feel bad for talking about it.. like a guilt trap and then things go back to normal... nothing really changed!!
Im thinking of the best things to do.. One would be to talk.. which doesnt sound promising!!
One would be to put up with it till i leave home, and then just never come back!
One would be to get someone else to say that they have noticed there is a problem between me and him, and talk.. except through acting no one has noticed and if they have noticed they wont make it known..
(HELP)
And what worse person to have a bad relationship with than your own dad?
And how do you deal with things like this?? Normally your dad is the one to give you advice, yet hes the one you need advice on!. Asking/talking to him seems to be out of the picture.. there is no way he is going to talk with me!
In fact it is advice this whole problem started.. Or maybe the lack of it.
Im now 17, almost 18, and i dont remember ever getting advice or learning from him about anything!! All i remember is getting told off for doing things wrong!! Always wrong!.....
How can i live like this?? Who taught me to shave? Me!.. plus trial and error Who taught me to ride a bike? My kindy teachers! Who taught me by example? Well that really depends on what.. but the only example i get from him is hypocritical!! He never taught me to play an instrument. he never taught me a sport. he never drew pictures with me. he never was interested in anything i did.. Unless i accidentally did it wrong and then i got yelled at!!
If i did ever do something right he would pretend to not notice.. or maybe he didnt...
I got a massive addiction to porn after attending school, and hearing about something called sex.. never in my sheltered life had i heard of it! So in that respect he did good at sheltering me.. But is shelter something that is going to help me later on in life?
I had nightmares and was sleepless for about a week after hearing from the youth pastor about demons.. He did a thorough research in the subject and even showed us pictures of possessed people and what they looked like before the possession.. and made out they had more power than they do.. but this was the first time i had heard of such a thing and it freaked me out!!
ALSO to add to this situation I know Christians should serve and have the attitude of a servant.. But is waiting on someones beck and call the answer to this??
If you watch little house and the prarie the girls had duties which they did and then the rest was up to them.. But in my house I do duties as well as run around for both my parents.. (me) do this, (me) do that! (me) why didnt you do that? (I was busy doing that other job for the other parent) I dont want to listen to your excuses really!! Just hurry up and do it!!..
I can act pretty good!! I can hang around girls prettending my mind is not drifting and they dont seem to notice!
I can act pretty good!! I can go to church with a smile on my face and pretend that i love my life and that everything is going well!
I can act pretty good!! I can stay in a big group of people such as a camp and last a week and make out i dont need time alone (introvert)
I can act pretty good!! I can be strong and make out that i can handle it!
But this is no act!! I am really struggling..!! It may seem like nothing from your side, or it may seem out of your grasp of advice? Or maybe you dont want to get involved and you dont think it is right for me to talk about my dad like this behind his back...
I have tried more than once to talk to him, but he then (stroppies around).
And he then makes me feel bad for talking about it.. like a guilt trap and then things go back to normal... nothing really changed!!
Im thinking of the best things to do.. One would be to talk.. which doesnt sound promising!!
One would be to put up with it till i leave home, and then just never come back!
One would be to get someone else to say that they have noticed there is a problem between me and him, and talk.. except through acting no one has noticed and if they have noticed they wont make it known..
(HELP)