Why Do I Feel Like The Guilty One?

I know that I have been just pooring out my feelings to you all on here and I haven't even been a member for very long. But everyone on here has been giving me more comforting words/verses than anyone else I know. And I appreciate it all. It's exactly what I need.

Anyway, I have mentioned in some of my posts that my mom has been spreading roomers about me, my husband and kids. Well, here is the scoop on what she said recently because for some reason I feel like I am the guilty one. :(

Ok...Earlier this year my brother and his girlfriend (Kyla) had broken up. But Kyla and I stayed in touch and my family did not like that. But I didn't care. Why should I? What happened, happened between them. Not me. So a couple months after the break up, Kyla told me that my brother told her that my mom was saying that my husband was malesting my daughter (who is 11) and beating me and I am too stupid to leave him (my husband). And my brother believes that it is happening also. :'( So I confronted my mom and brother on what was said and now my mom stopped talking to me and my brother just denies it. Was it wrong for me to have confronted them? Because I feel like I was in the wrong. Or should I have not said anything and just left it alone? All I wanted was to find out the truth. Is that so horrible? I have been so stressed out about this. I tried calling my mom and she never answers. Today, I saw her on FB and messaged her and she actually responded. But it wasn't a good ending. :( She said that I chose Kyla over my family. I'm not real sure where she got that from because Kyla didn't do anything to me. So I don't see why she has to be upset that we are friends. :( AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
 
wow, well( I don't mean this to be rude or offensive so please don't take it that way)But... I'm just going to guess that your mom may have some sort of mental condition....

I think for her to spread a rumor that farfetched about her own daughter, something has to be off,you know?

So if she does happen to have a mental condition, hopefully knowing that will help you take what she says with a grain of salt.... since she's not inn her right mind.


As for the guilt, who cares what she or anyone else thinks,whether the rumors were true or not...
God ( who trumps every and anyone) loves and accepts you:)
 
Also, I think ,maybe_ just maybe it might be a good idea to take a break from your mom ...just for a bit, because she's creating tension and fueling the fire....and during that break... you can grow in the lord by spending time with Him.
 
I know that I have been just pooring out my feelings to you all on here and I haven't even been a member for very long. But everyone on here has been giving me more comforting words/verses than anyone else I know. And I appreciate it all. It's exactly what I need.

Anyway, I have mentioned in some of my posts that my mom has been spreading roomers about me, my husband and kids. Well, here is the scoop on what she said recently because for some reason I feel like I am the guilty one. :(

Ok...Earlier this year my brother and his girlfriend (Kyla) had broken up. But Kyla and I stayed in touch and my family did not like that. But I didn't care. Why should I? What happened, happened between them. Not me. So a couple months after the break up, Kyla told me that my brother told her that my mom was saying that my husband was malesting my daughter (who is 11) and beating me and I am too stupid to leave him (my husband). And my brother believes that it is happening also. :'( So I confronted my mom and brother on what was said and now my mom stopped talking to me and my brother just denies it. Was it wrong for me to have confronted them? Because I feel like I was in the wrong. Or should I have not said anything and just left it alone? All I wanted was to find out the truth. Is that so horrible? I have been so stressed out about this. I tried calling my mom and she never answers. Today, I saw her on FB and messaged her and she actually responded. But it wasn't a good ending. :( She said that I chose Kyla over my family. I'm not real sure where she got that from because Kyla didn't do anything to me. So I don't see why she has to be upset that we are friends. :( AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!
Wowwwww. You weren't in the wrong at all, you were just telling them the truth while they spread lies about your husband behind your back. Seriously cut contact with them if they can't even be decent people, let alone act like a family should. You have no reason to feel bad whatsoever, other than the fact that your family is so disgraceful, but that isn't your fault!
 
I know that I have been just pooring out my feelings to you all on here and I haven't even been a member for very long. But everyone on here has been giving me more comforting words/verses than anyone else I know. And I appreciate it all. It's exactly what I need.

Anyway, I have mentioned in some of my posts that my mom has been spreading roomers about me, my husband and kids. Well, here is the scoop on what she said recently because for some reason I feel like I am the guilty one. :(

Ok...Earlier this year my brother and his girlfriend (Kyla) had broken up. But Kyla and I stayed in touch and my family did not like that. But I didn't care. Why should I? What happened, happened between them. Not me. So a couple months after the break up, Kyla told me that my brother told her that my mom was saying that my husband was malesting my daughter (who is 11) and beating me and I am too stupid to leave him (my husband). And my brother believes that it is happening also. :'( So I confronted my mom and brother on what was said and now my mom stopped talking to me and my brother just denies it. Was it wrong for me to have confronted them? Because I feel like I was in the wrong. Or should I have not said anything and just left it alone? All I wanted was to find out the truth. Is that so horrible? I have been so stressed out about this. I tried calling my mom and she never answers. Today, I saw her on FB and messaged her and she actually responded. But it wasn't a good ending. :( She said that I chose Kyla over my family. I'm not real sure where she got that from because Kyla didn't do anything to me. So I don't see why she has to be upset that we are friends. :( AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!

I'm going to go out on a limb here. Falsely accusing someone of molestation is as bad as molesting someone. Take any accusation like that seriously but if you have clear evidence that such a thing is not occurring whoever makes a claim like that needs serious sanctions.

As for you I see nothing wrong with what you did. I will grant I don't know their side so take our bias into consideration. But as a man I hate the hearsay going on here and it leads to nothing good. Direct confrontation is the best way to get everyone on the same page. Avoid using middle men in communications especially ones this serious.

Lastly, don't at all feel bad about venting. The people who respond do so because they enjoy it and they care. No one is forced to.
 
I know that I have been just pooring out my feelings to you all on here and I haven't even been a member for very long. But everyone on here has been giving me more comforting words/verses than anyone else I know. And I appreciate it all. It's exactly what I need.

Anyway, I have mentioned in some of my posts that my mom has been spreading roomers about me, my husband and kids. Well, here is the scoop on what she said recently because for some reason I feel like I am the guilty one. :(

Ok...Earlier this year my brother and his girlfriend (Kyla) had broken up. But Kyla and I stayed in touch and my family did not like that. But I didn't care. Why should I? What happened, happened between them. Not me. So a couple months after the break up, Kyla told me that my brother told her that my mom was saying that my husband was malesting my daughter (who is 11) and beating me and I am too stupid to leave him (my husband). And my brother believes that it is happening also. :'( So I confronted my mom and brother on what was said and now my mom stopped talking to me and my brother just denies it. Was it wrong for me to have confronted them? Because I feel like I was in the wrong. Or should I have not said anything and just left it alone? All I wanted was to find out the truth. Is that so horrible? I have been so stressed out about this. I tried calling my mom and she never answers. Today, I saw her on FB and messaged her and she actually responded. But it wasn't a good ending. :( She said that I chose Kyla over my family. I'm not real sure where she got that from because Kyla didn't do anything to me. So I don't see why she has to be upset that we are friends. :( AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!

The way your mom sees it, her baby's girlfriend hurt him and by remaining friends with said girlfriend, she's mad at you for choosing the girlfriend over your own brother - this is pure crap (forgive me - but I wanted to say something stronger). I wouldn't take that from them, but you must forgive them (send away the hurt) otherwise it'll just eat you up no different than if they had physically attacked you.

Pro 18:8 KJV - 8 The words of a talebearer [are] as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.

Pro 18:14 KJV - 14 The spirit of a man will sustain his infirmity; but a wounded spirit who can bear?

It won't be easy because once you get over the terrible wound inflicted on you, it could still turn it into anger for being wronged and then you want justice. Once that sits and stews for a while it'll turn into bitterness and now you have a relationship problem with the Lord, Matthew 5: 23-24.

Now is the time to surrender the feelings to the Lord and send away (the meaning of forgiveness) those offences. As far as confronting them, you did the right thing in taking the first step, Mat 18:15-18.
 
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