Think of it like this...do you fear your parents, or did you growing up? In a way, yes, because you knew if you disobeyed them, there would be repercussions. Now for normal parents, these repercussions would be like a slap of the hand, but it was a sign of their love. Life would go on, and we learn from our mistakes. Again, in a "normal" parent and child relationship, the children do, in a sense, fear their parents and with this fear comes obedience. At the end of the day, we still love them and know they love us.
Unfortunately, for those who have been mistreated (like myself), our view of God and His love is often skewed. It then takes time to grasp the love He has for us, and to distinguish the difference between Him and our parents, with whom we may have not learned a normal feeling of love and fear.