Denis

I don´t have this habit !

A christian mustn´t have !!

shllby1

I don't visit them and have no problem if people do. I have an aunt though who visits my grandmom and goes there to "talk to her" I dont agree with that.

Boanerges

It is simply a choice each must make.

KitsapGirl

We go twice a year. Ours is a family plot with no endowment. This means, we own the land for the purpose of burial, and no one takes care of it. Fresh flowers always make the plot look nicer, and flags show others that certain members were veterans. We also mow, and trim the edges. Occasionally we need to remove limbs.

I will be buried there some day. My husband will be buried there some day. While we are there the kids ask us questions about the members they did not know, and also about when we die. I find it to be a very good time to have with my children. they know I will die when God takes me home, and they know what will need to be done.

Death is a part of life. It can't be ignored, because it WILL happen. Not talking about it is not a loving act. it's cowardly IMHO.

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Boanerges

KG you know I love and respect you but that is not a very wise statement.
We openly discuss the issue and we also discuss our lineage. We have an intresting family traditon. Our plots are cared for under contract. I PERSONALLY do not feel the need to go as there is no one home anyway.
Death is just another step in the journey for Christians but not going to visit bricks and bones does not make one a coward.
So again it seems a matter of personal choice.
Much love in Christ, brother Larry.

smellycat

i think it,s the closest we can get to them on earth,just to talk to them and tell them we miss them.we know there not there.

KitsapGirl

What I meant to say is that many of our family members refuse to even talk about death. They haven't spoken their wishes to their children, haven't asked their parents what their wishes are. They refuse to acknowledge it will happen. This is what I believe is cowardly. We are the caretakers of the family plot because the others refuse to do their part.

I've seen it happen both ways. The family members that I witnessed growing up that prepared by openly talking about death, or died after a long illness made the aftermath easier for those left behind. Those who did not talk about it, or died suddenly were very difficult to get over. There was little peace for the family.

Since we are the keepers of the plot by default, we use the work day as an opportunity to talk to whoever living is there. It has been very rewarding.

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Boanerges

I understand. The family that plans and discusses these things will have many less unexpected problems to deal with at their worst times. And secrecy also promotes fear fo the unknown, your little ones should grow up knowing to be absent from the body is to be presnt with the Lord.
Blessings and peace on your day- Larry.

smellycat

i don,t see why we can,t bury loved ones in the garden.does it have to be at a mass grave site?

adoptivemommy

Personally, I think expensive graves sites with marble head stones, fancy hard wood coffins, etc. are a big waste of money! Recently I lost a friend an colleague of mine who lost her battle with cancer after many brave years! I went to the viewing the night before the funeral and I have to say it was a real lesson for me! I've always believed that all the fuss we make over funerals and burials is kind of useless especially when we as Christians believe that the soul and spirit is already in Heaven when the dead body is still here, but when I saw my friend laying in that coffin, all of my convictions about these thongs were confirmed and solidified. She looked NOTHING like herself. In fact she looked like an entirely different person. She was gone and all the earthly rituals were in fact for the surviving people not for her! As far as my husband and I are concerned, we are both going to be cremated but after everything that is still good and usable in our bodies has been given to the hospitals so that people who are in line waiting for different organs can benefit and their lives can be saved! It is after all the same as if a relative would be giving your clothes to someone in need after you die! This body is just a covering, a host for the soul and spirit which, the moment the body is dead, are gone! So why so much fuss over an inanimate object! My opinion!

Laura

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Forgiveness is His Signature!