How do I find a person is a friend or NOT?

Leonidus · 02-02-2008, 09:05 AM

In this world there are people with different personalities, belief system, ethics, character…etc

When selecting a person to be a friend, what sort of guide line does the bible say?

It is difficult to measure people weather they are genuine or wishy-washy (fake). But to find a person is real or not we have to observe him and through those observations we have to pass certain judgments on him.

But the bible says “do NOT judge others so you shall not be judged”

How do I find weather a person is a friend or he is with me only to seek benefits or to harm me?

smellycat · 02-02-2008, 09:29 AM

takes a long time.friendship is built on time.people,s opinions can change.

violet · 02-02-2008, 10:07 AM

A friend is someone who accepts you exactly the way you are.
They listen.
They care.
They want to be with you~
They stick by you through the bad times as well as the good~

Theophilus · 02-02-2008, 10:29 AM

Quote:

But the bible says “do NOT judge others so you shall not be judged”

This is probibily the most missused and miss understood verse in all of scripture.
The written word of God tells us not to place ourselves in his position of bing the judge of a persons eteranal direction. (in other words" Don't judge or assume to know if another person is going to hell or heaven. This does not mean that we are not to judge or discern their actions for purposes of correction ,guidence, counceling dicipline or to determine if we should as followers of Christ be associated with them.

Quote:

How do I find weather a person is a friend or he is with me only to seek benefits or to harm me?

The answers to many questions are found in the basic precepts and principles of god's written word. This is one of the of them
You judge a freind by the same standard scripture tells us to judge a tree.
By it's fruit. That takes time and effort.
People used to say "If it sounds like a duck ,looks like a duck , and acts like a duck it is probably a duck"
The same holds true for freinds.

Note;
We don't make freinds. . . We find them by being freinds.

Your freind
Cliff

Born2LoveYou · 02-02-2008, 10:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Theophilus

This is probibily the most missused and miss understood verse in all of scripture.
The written word of God tells us not to place ourselves in his position of bing the judge of a persons eteranal direction. (in other words" Don't judge or assume to know if another person is going to hell or heaven. This does not mean that we are not to judge or discern their actions for purposes of correction ,guidence, counceling dicipline or to determine if we should as followers of Christ be associated with them.

Cliff

Thank you Brother Cliff, For clearing that up for me.
I thought it was judging people in general about things they do.

DivineFire-VX · 02-02-2008, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violet

A friend is someone who accepts you exactly the way you are.
They listen.
They care.
They want to be with you~
They stick by you through the bad times as well as the good~

Thats well said and very true, but also dont forget...

Accepting someone the way they are, listening to them, caring for them, wanting to be with them and sticking by them through good times and bad makes YOU a friend !!

Leonidus · 02-02-2008, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Theophilus

This is probibily the most missused and miss understood verse in all of scripture.
The written word of God tells us not to place ourselves in his position of bing the judge of a persons eteranal direction. (in other words" Don't judge or assume to know if another person is going to hell or heaven. This does not mean that we are not to judge or discern their actions for purposes of correction ,guidence, counceling dicipline or to determine if we should as followers of Christ be associated with them.

I thought it is a sin to judge a person of his behavior as a bad or a good person. Brother cliff TY for clearing this up : ) GOD BLESS!

I got this question from the latter part of your answer:

How do we recongnize the wolves who looks like sheeps, acts like sheeps (for our eyes), speak like sheeps, smells like sheeps...etc?

Can we judge places?
e.g.: Assume there is a place on earth called "X" and if i say "X" is like Hell or "X" is hell,
will i be commiting sin by judging that place?

Beloved · 02-02-2008, 01:00 PM

TIP:

When you first meet someone if possible let them do most all the talking...

When its appropiate say yes, and ask them a few, A FEW questions about themselves to get them talking more...

Listen intendly... Take mental notes... You will soon discover if this person is friend material or not...

One of our jobs is to LOVE people... But that does not mean everyone is suitable for friendship...

"Be as wise as a serpent and harmless as a dove"

Dusty · 02-02-2008, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by violet

A friend is someone who accepts you exactly the way you are.

They listen.
They care.
They want to be with you~
They stick by you through the bad times as well as the good~

Good advice , Violet. God gives us special friends who love us for who we are and not what we do . It is in fact unconditional love just as Jesus has for us. To find a friend like that takes time and effort and one has to be a friend to find a good friend. We can share our heartaches , our sorrows , our happiness and together .
We can cry , laugh or anything in between. A friend is someone we can feel completely as ease with and comfortable. A friend is also a prayer partner that you can trust to not gossip and pray with to gether.

Boanerges · 02-02-2008, 01:40 PM

Pro 20:11 Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.

As Cliff has stated we know people by the fruit they bear.

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