Mark

I have three girls and have wrestled with appropriate rules for my daughters' clothing. The difference between a secular society and Biblical values is growing. How do you handle this conflict?

In addressing this do you ever refer to Scripture? Do you set "physical rules?" - no bellies showing, sleeves on shirts, etc. How do you explain modesty to a pre-teen?

__________________
Mark Strohm, Jr.
Thrifty Times

Mark

It is bathing suit season here in the US and this becomes an issue all over again. I would love to hear what others have set as expectations for their daughters.

__________________
Mark Strohm, Jr.
Thrifty Times

Mary17

I wear things that are flattering on me and work with my shape, but nothing that would be considered inmodest. I feel that our bodies are for the glory of God. God made us just the way he wanted, I don't think he would be too pleased if he knew people were advertising what he made special. In my point of view it is only appropriate to show certain parts of yourself to your significant other. Because that is when you become one flesh.
But just wearing clothes in general, out of respect I think their are certain places of yourself that you should keep to yourself. Because once again God made you special, use yourself to praise him!

Sincerely/Mary

Always ask yourself this question, is what I doing honoring God?

Boanerges

A wise women of God once addressed a church group I was in and specifically told the ladies to spend a little time in the mirror sitting standing etc to see what others see- one of her points is that many men struggle in this area and not wanting to cause a brother to stumble should be an important factor- I tend to agree with her because I believe we are responsible for the signals we send to others. As a parent there are alot of styles that would simply neve rmake it past my wife or myself in my house- I give my kids plenty of room for expression but nothing imodest- it breaks my heart to see some of these children-and little girls in particular dressed up in something that looks like only hookers would have worn 20 years ago but just go to the mall or worse yet the beach- this is all those demonically possesed child molestors need to get them interested in someones kid- it is our responsability to draw the lines.

violet

Mark

Violet,

I am thrilled you want to keep your daughter away from dressing immodestly. In a year or two it will take much more than "because I said so" and will take negotiating and a clear understanding of what modesty is and how your daughter will dress to create that modesty.

So what are those "rules" in your family?

__________________
Mark Strohm, Jr.
Thrifty Times

violet

Boanerges

Just a thought- a Pastor friend once told me " don't judge me by what my kids do and I won't judge you by what yours do" - I find these words to live by as sometimes despite the very best upbringing kids can really surprise and shock their parents- I am all for training them when they are young by both word and deed but sometimes we can be shocked at what desicisions a young adolesant can make.

mustardseed

Thanks for the link Violet, it was very nice.
I agree that girls should dress modestly and stand out to be different.
This is a sign of respect towards ourselves and it's a good testimony to God too.

__________________
God grades on the cross, not the curve.

atHISfeet

I have daughters. They attend public school, and the fashion is jaw dropping to say the least. My wife and I came up with an easy rule for guiding their dress: Arms and Legs below the knee- One layer, Legs above the knee up to the bottom of their neck- two layers. If a dress is worn, same applies, but knee socks are to be worn so that there may be no accidental violations. When the girls get frustrated with their fashionable schoolmates, I remind them of uncle Sheffield who had two daughters that wore what they pleased. Sheffield passed four years ago, cardiac arrest. I pray that they take these lessons into adulthood with them.