tlc

WasLost,

When I heard your story, I remembered Apostle Paul. He is even worse than you. He had followers of Christ killed. He pursued them to punish them.

Then one day, GOD reached out to him and the rest of course is a new life guided with the Holy Spirit.

__________________
http://thinklikeclark.blogspot.com

Boanerges

I remember listening to the testimony of Corrie Ten Boom- an incredible woman of God
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corrie_ten_Boom

She was in a nazy concentration camp (as was her whole family) teaching bible studies in her particular section of the death camp. When asked by one of the other inmates why she would bother reading the bible when they were left abandoned in that terrible place her response was " there is no pit so dark and deep that God's love is not deeper still". If you haven't read "The Hiding Place" I would encourage you to do do- it is the story of the couragouse Ten Boom family and their efforts to smuggle Jewish people out of the country during the nazi occupation and the price they subsiquently each paid .

WasLost

I have heard a few times in my stay here so far that my situation is much like Paul's. I'd be interested in some good littertature on Paul and his life...not only in biblical terms, but in other non-fiction books as well. I'm hoping that the similarities I have with Paul will help me to achieve the short-term goals I have set for myself, primarily, self-forgiveness, direction, and to become a vessel of Christ. If anyone has any suggestions regarding further reading on Paul, please either PM me or reply here. Thank you all!

God bless,
WasLost

Boanerges

Although Saul (later Paul) is key player in the early church and the scriptures
give a fair amount of info on his background there doesn't seem to be to much available other info available- at least that I am aware of! You can however find some info on him at these links:


http://www.ccel.org/contrib/exec_out...ul/paul_01.htm

http://www.searchgodsword.org/enc/cb...cgi?number=T57

Boanerges

Waslost how are you doing brother? I am keeping you in my prayers- let me know whats up!

da_man

I just got through reading this entire thread and it is awesome.
Waslost we love you and thank the Lord that your heart has turned to him. We all question how God can love us with all of the sin that we have committed but I think it is too hard for our human minds to comprehend the amount of love that God has for us. The closest comparison I can think of, is when my son does something wrong I still love him the same and we go on. That is how our Father feels for us. We are going to do the wrong things from time to time but he will still love us. Just as John 3:16 says "that God so loved the world that he gave his only Son." He loves you very much and is very thankful that you have turned your heart to.
It is so uplifting to me as a Christian to read a thread such as this one. Just know that no matter what has happened in your past, God has wiped your slate clean.

WasLost

Sorry I've been scarce as of late. I'm still unemployed and looking for work. My wife and I have also started bankruptcy procedures. In addition, I'm working with a law firm to see if I have a legal case against my former employer for constructive discharge, sexual discrimination, and creating a hostile work environment. These cases are very difficult to prove and in all likelyhood I don't have a leg to stand on despite having suffered through the worst management team ever. It's all a very long story and one I don't want to bore everyone with.

Life is certainly challenging and I'm trying to make the best of it. I'm on a number of medications for depression and anxiety and my relationship with my agnostic wife has been strained. She's had a hard time dealing with my conversion to Christianity. I keep praying and reading the bible. Day by day...

WasLost

Boanerges

Waslost I am so sorry you are having so much trouble- this must be the reason God has put you on my heart - I am praying for you and hoping things will turn around shortly- God bless you brother- Larry

da_man

Waslost. You will get through this. I think when things like this happen it is Satan trying to get back into your life. He is throwing things at you because he wants you to stumble and fall. But just remember God will always carry you. Just as the old Footprints in the Sand story says that when times are hardest you will only see one set of prints because God was carrying you.
Keep praying and we will be praying for you also.

adoptivemommy

Hi WasLost!

I am sorry that only today I noticed your thread, but when I did I was immediately drawn to it. I red your first post in January, then red a little through the answers.

First let me just say what an incredible story yours is. I love every story of salvation, but I really delight in seeing something so powerful, so inspiring like your dream. Yes, in a way you are like Paul. He was just riding along on the Damascus road, minding his own business, so to speak, when Jesus Himself came up to him and changed his life forever. From that day on Paul became one of the most powerful man of God and he never looked back. One thing I want to point out to you about Paul. I beleive one of the greatest reasons why he was able to become such a great man of God, despite his past sins, was because he took time to understand and recieve Jesus' love and forgivness for him personally. You see, Jesus knew you before the foundation of the earth. That means that even before God formed the earth, Jesus knew you, loved you and most of all aprooved of YOU! You notice I am not saying He aproved of your deeds, but He did aprove of you. He loves you, WasLost! He loves you with a love that is beyond our understanding and that is the reason why He gave you that dream. Please, don't focus on how you are going to overcome your past, don't focus on your past or even your present sins. His LOVE covers ALL of that. Just ask Jesus to show you through the Holy Spirit, just how much He really does love YOU! It's all that matters right now. Yes, God will want to change you and your habbits and your life, but that will come later. Right now just let Him love you, let Him show you just how important YOU are to Him, worts and all. God NEVER cleans His fish before He catches it. Only religion tries to do that and religion is NOT what you want to have. Jesus' love, forgivness, mercy, acceptance and understanding of our short comings is what truly changes us. Not religion, not the law, not rules. There are no "12 steps to recovery" that every body in the world can follow to get "right" with God! God's plan is individual and special for every human being on earth, which means He has already custom-made a good plan specific only for your life. Just let Him show it to you in time. For now just recieve His love and all will be well!

One more thing... Your wife is God's bussiness. He will draw her to Him in time, just as He did with you. Don't worry about her because, just like you, she is in His good hands, even if she doesn't believe it yet.

So, hang in there and when it gets really tough write to us here! We will encourage you! Take heart! You've already taken the hardest step!

Laura