hisdreamer

Heres one - if you are at the grocery store and you have a buggy/cart full of grocerys and the person behind you only has an item or two - let them go before you. I offered to do that the other day and the soldier looked at me with surprise but said no thank you ma'am (heh he was older than me too) and told me he had plenty of time. Its a small thing but it can really make a difference in someone's day that you took the time to notice them.

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Rumely

Doing acts of kindness helps me get in tune with God's Spirit; to get with His program, so to speak. To me, it is a form of worship, as well, since I am not naturally patient or especially thoughtful. Usually, these acts "cost" little, but do a world of good.

GrannyG

What a sweet, lovely thread. Yes, we do need more manners, "Thank you kindly for that, Miss Manners." And yes, we do need more kindness. Mostly, though we need more "Christ likeness in our lives." When we have that, we will experience the outpouring of more manners and more kindnesses.

I'll add, though....

• Gentlemen, protect the women with whom you are associated - not just your girlfriend or wife. If a lady has to stay late to work, be certain she is not alone in the building. Recommend: not just you, the gentleman, stay with her because of the possibility of gossip, etc. Further protect ladies by walking on the outside when out walking. This stems from protecting the lady from abusive individuals in the road and walkway and also protecting them from splashes from mud (from days when streets were unpaved ). In other words, find ways to throw a shield of protectiveness around the ladies. I believe that God smiles favorably on that.
• Ladies, when you are protected by a gentleman or when someone (child, man, other lady) holds the door for you, graciously smile and verbally reply with thanks.
• Sprinkle smiles around wherever you go - especially to stores where you see harrassed clerks, cashiers, stockers, and managers. It will help you and it will certainly help them.
• See someone ahead of you who is a little short of funds to pay for their order and that order is good for them? Give that dollar or so to bless them.
• Bless your pastor with a gift card to a restaurant so he and his wife/family can enjoy an evening out.
• Bless your neighbor by being there for them but not being "in their face."
• Know a widow or widower who could use a little financial assist - especially in your church body? Go through the pastor and give an anonymous gift. It just might buy that month's prescription they so desperately need or it just might allow their thermostat to register a little more heat in the house.

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Whirlwind

These are great!

Could you imagine if we all started doing this? We could pull society back together again.

Over the weekend, it was bitterly cold in Bend when I went shopping. I was on my way into Target when I saw a woman practically in tears, bent over and looking at the ground in front of the entrance.

Cars were honking for her to move, and people were shuffling past her. I asked her if she lost something.

"I lost my black pearl earring!" she said, almost crying.

It was awfully cold and my face was going numb, but I helped her. I was shocked that nobody else was stopping to help. I felt bad for this woman, didn't even know her, but I knew that if I lost something, I'd appreciate a little help finding it.

Finally, about ten minutes later: "Here it is!"

She looked relieved, and I went about my shopping. That's all it takes. Treating every lady like your sister. Every man like your brother.

Sure, I didn't want to stand out in the cold looking for someone else's earring. It was uncomfortable and cold.

So I just thought how I would feel being uncomfortable and cold and feeling afraid that I wasn't going to find what I was looking for.

What about the ma'am/miss thing? I grew up learning that a woman who looks 10-years older than you should be addressed as ma'am. Any others should be called "miss" (this is when you're not sure whether she's married or not) Anybody got rules for this?

What about for men? Young man? Sir? Mister?

Thanks!

GrannyG

The manners of assistance:
Thanks for your post on the missing pearl. Sure it wasn't the "Pearl of Great Price" but it was a worthy object to help the other lady find. Thank you for your kindness to her.

Saturday while grocery shopping, I was waiting to get through a crowded asile when I saw a handicapped lady (stooped, misformed hands, etc. - rheumatoid arthritis I guess) trying to locate an item on the bottom shelf. She picked one up with difficulty and saw it wasn't what she wanted. She tried and tried to get where she could see the cans. I asked if I could help her find something. She told me what she was looking for, I squatted to the bottom shelf, and reached way in the back for the canned item. She would never have been able to find what she wanted. Such a simple thing to do. But it blessed me and I believe it blessed her. (Note, I am nearly 69.)

We try to teach children in the south the courtsey of yes m'am and no m'am and yes sir and no sir. We are ridiculed by some from out of the south for this practice. However, I have found (and so have my grown children) that such a courtsey really goes a long way in the big bad world. It is a term of respect and when you render respect you more likely will be given respect.

The greatest courtsey of all is to acknowlege our Lord Jesus Christ and his saving work on our behalf. Have we thanked Him today?

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Boanerges

It's nice to be nice!

Azarias

Wow, that is amazing. Thanks for sharing

As for courtesy itself, I am still surprised what 'please' and 'thank you' can do, and also holding the door for others. Sometimes someone will simply slam the door in your face, and people get used to this...and I can see the look of surprise sometimes when I do it...it is unfortunate.

Whirlwind

I know that look - seen it many times.

The look that says...nobody's done this for me in years! Why are you doing this for me? I don't deserve this! Please, don't be kind to me! You don't know me. If you knew me, you wouldn't be so kind.

Breaks my heart. Then there are some people who just haven't seen kindness before. They're genuinely appreciative.

I held the door open for this little old lady at Denny's like 8 years ago. She had that look on her face, and she practically curled up into a ball when she went inside as I held the door for her. She whispered thank you. I told her You're welcome.

When we were ready to leave, the waitress told us that our meal was paid for. I ask who did it, and she said some little old lady did it. My heart broke.

I wasn't expecting anything in return from her, but I was glad just the same. Wish I could find her today and hug her.

Azarias

All good deeds have their reward.

Whirlwind

True, Azarias...true.

But not all rewards have their good deeds. *head spinning now*