Originally Posted by Bassmasa

You know, I think it's admirable that you had the courage to post this! Oddly, after reading your description, you've actually made me want to meet you in person. The fact that this bothers you enough to post it shows me that you can find change this problem if you rely on Him to help.

I don't say this to be prideful, but to bring the perspective of the type of person you have trouble dealing with. I'm the opposite of your personality.

When I meet people like you've described, I generally do not have a problem with them initially. BUT, once people of this nature start giving unsolicited advice, that's when I get irritated. You didn't mention this at all, but do you often tell others how they're screwing up or how they can improve their lives? Quite honestly, personality might have little to do with your problem, but advising others without their requests would seem to give the responses you listed.

Here's a hypothetical example. PLEASE don't think this is the case, because I assure you it is not. On this site, there is thread about different religions and baptism. Very appropriately in this case, you posted a seperate topic about the Jewish view of baptism. Remember, I'm glad you did this and do not think for one second this is an actual example, your post was very enlightening and completely appropriate for this forum--THIS IS HYPOTHETICAL!

But suppose you were in a worship service and someone just realized the joy of baptism. Would you be tempted to step in and say, "Yes, but, are you familiar with the Jewish perspective?" You would probably have meant this in a loving and enlightening way, but unintentionally rained on the parade. This example could be far from what you're describing, but in my experience in dealing with people who are what you've described, this is the #1 characteristic that makes them seem aloof and arrogant: unsolicited advice and raining on others' joy.

My boss has this same problem. I know he cares for us, but sometimes he just grates on us. Perfect example. My co-worker just returned from a trip to Paris that her husband earned through his job. It was a relatively quick, 5-day trip. She got back, excited about her trip and ready to tell us all about it. When she was done, our boss said, "Well, it was only a 5-day trip...you didn't see everything." That cut her deeply, though he meant no offense. He completely rained on her joy. Of course, being the boss, I sure didn't bring that to his attention.

This is just a thought and offered in sincere brotherly love. I must say, Otetiani, your presence here is a breath of fresh air, thanks for joining us.