You seem to be struggling with you (attitude and all that).
I want you to take a moment and think about what you spend your time doing. If you do not spend enough time with God, listening or reading His word or attending services in church, you are bound to find yourself doing all that stuff.
The God's kind of love is spread abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost as revealed in the word of God. If you do not create the right atmosphere where the Holy Ghost can minister to you or work through you, He cannot spread the love of God in your heart. The result you get in return is the inability to love as you mentioned.
Read and listen to God's Word always, and you will be amazed how that some of those attitudes will check out of your life without your notice.
bless you!
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