Was Lost - God's power is infinite. He seems to have reached out a lifeline to you in the form of a vision and you seem to have reached out for it in an attempt to preserve a Child of God - YOU YOURSELF!
Please make an attempt to cast out the previous thoughts and beliefs and accept the Teachings of Jesus Christ and His Father, God Almighty. If you have a GOOD quality Bible such as the New Living Translation, please refer to the Healing Prayers in
James 5 (NLT) for peace of mind. Then, start slowly in reading all of the chapters starting with Genesis all the way through to Revelation, in a speed that you are comfortable with. As you learn the story of the seedline of Christ, you will appreciate what His sacrifice was and how it affects those who truly believe.
Welcome to the forum - you are among friends here.