Originally Posted by steveh53

I am a 53 year old christian man with four grown up children, and five grand children. My problem is that I don't feel any love for my kids or grand kids. Their mother and I were divorced in 1990. I was devistated and did what ever I could do to be a part of my kids life. Their mother used the kids to get her way and actually put the kids up to stealing from me on many occasions. I was not perfect but throughout the years, I tried to be a good father but my ex wife was always their "hero" and nothing I did was ever good enough and their mother could do no wrong. Through those years, each one of them has stolen from me,lied to me and talked and laughed behind my back and I felt like a fool. The final straw was when my son got married and did not invite me to the wedding because it would have made his mother uncomfortable.

Now they are all grown up married,and have kids and call me and want me in their lives and I don't feel anything for them. In fact, when I hear their voices I tense up. If I never saw any of them again it would be just fine with me. I do see them out of some kind of duty because I am their father, abut I honestly do not want to be there. I feel no connection to them or the grand kids.

I know that this is not the way I am supposed to feel and I know it is wrong. I have prayed about it many times and have tried to act as if I did love them in the hopes that something would come back but I just can't get it back. I wish they would just leave me alone.