Thanks guys.
I take no offense Biblethumper. You've clearly grown up a lot different from me. All my friends are into drinking, partying, and a lot of them drugs. I don't have any desire to go into a bar either. I've been to house partys and been drunk many times. I haven't drunk driven but I've drunk biked. To the point where I don't really remember riding home, but I remember I didn't care if a curb got in the way! I have to confess too, that one time while drunk out of my face I tried smoking pot. It was an experience that I could never begin to explain. I knew God was in my heart though, because I felt nothing but paranoia and my mind drew so many pictures and hallucinations of evil.
I felt like I was starting to be shown (By satan) how life is made. I felt like I was watching someone draw it out. I felt that satan was trying to lure me to where he'd show me secrets that God doesn't want me to see. Almost like he's the real good guy and God's brainwashing me!!! I was even seeing these red dots along the lines of the cieling and walls that a guy there saw too and said they're called pixels. He said he sees them every day. One of the things I realized is that you can't imagine what being high is like unless your currently "In there" Let me say I'm very ashamed I took part in this evil.
I will never go there again.
One of the quotes I made up is "Never mistake desensitization for growing up" I remember when I never would have thought of drinking. Then you think that's OK but I'd never do the next worse thing, then you do, then you say that's OK but I'd never do...etc. What do people on the outside see as you go through this? Shockingly they see you growing up and doing more adult things. It's sad.
The friends that want to take me out BTW, are people I work with. they are 23 and up. I have quite old friends. My closest friend is a 23-year-old girl.
I need a good christian girlfriend. I think that would really help my wanting to drink. I don't have to, but it's my 18th and the guys will think I'm retarded or something if I don't drink.
What's a posh restaurant?
What do ya know my friend just sent an email asking the plan for my 18th.
Mark
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