Quote:
Originally Posted by NoDoubt
Thanks for the kind words everyone...
Beloved - My health is stable, though I'm painfully small by American standards. Being wierd AND small does not make me attractive, so marraige and offspring seems completely out of reach when even acquiring a girlfriend is excruciatingly difficult.
Holding down a job is difficult because it's so hard for me to focus on anything, even things I enjoy. Employers think I'm smart but lazy.
Yes - depression is a symptom of Autism, apparently, and would explain why I was depressed before I even knew the concept thereof. Suicide has been on my mind since I was 4, I don't even remember it (nor much of my childhood), but I found that out from my mom.
Even those things that I used to consider my strengths are collapsing in front of me. I'm losing friends, losing income, losing abilities, losing track, losing everything. My life is falling apart while I watch, and I can't take it.
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Like the prophet of old, I see a small cloud arising from a distance, the size of a mans hand
I hear distant thunderings and rummblings.
I smell rain in the wind, the heavens are parting
Upon a dry and WEARY people so shall My rains come
Refreshing rains to heal my people.
Thus sayeth the Lord
Do not step were you do not know, sayeth the Lord.
Walk with Me, and we will be One. Take My hand and I will take you to great and wonderful places you know not of.
I Will be your Father Mother Sister Brother. I Will be your Best Friend.
Sacrifice all for me and I will give you more than you can imagine. Thus sayeth the Lord.