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Bondman · 08-13-2008, 04:17 PM

HUSBANDS and WIVES

Quote:

Originally Posted by worshipper

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. I agree that this preceding scripture "sets the stage" and it is sorely OVERLOOKED by most teachers and husbands especially; except for you of course.

I have shared this scripture with my dh and he contends that the husband does not have to submit to the wife in anything; he is the head.

It appears that hubby is what I'd probably call "dug in" as to what he feels is his role in the marriage. HE'S CERTAINLY NOT ALONE!! - but is standing with many millions of other Christian husbands with a wrong understanding of what the Scriptures really say. For example we could ask concerning Ephesians Ch 5:21 submitting to one another in the fear of God, "What is it about "submitting to EACH ANOTHER" that you don't understand? But of course we WON'T ask him that, because it would be as unloving as it would be futile and VERY counter-productive. We could also ask: "Is it a pure ACCIDENT that God just 'happened' to write this particular verse (v. 21 above) - not just close to all the instructions as to the roles and relationships of husband to wife, and not just as a part of the instructions, but EXACTLY PRECEDING THE WHOLE LOT OF THEM? I don't think so!!!

Then we could go to v. 25 where the Lord issues to us husbands a command that's utterly mind-blowing in its intent, and which I've always said was FAR HARDER to do than a wife submitting to her hubby: Ephesians Ch 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

Let's ask a few very pertinent questions here. 1. How does Christ love His church? - TOTALLY!! 2. How MUCH does Christ love His church? - so much that He SACRIFICED His life for her!! 3. How does He treat His church? - He loves and cares about us all SO MUCH, giving Himself completely to us in order for us to grow to be like Him. 4. What is Christ's focus concerning His church? - it's TOTAL and it's CONSTANT and it's COMPLETE, loving us and ALWAYS wanting the very, very best for us. 5. What is Christ's aim and purpose for His church? - v. 27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish, i.e., that through Him, the church should be able to grow to nothing short of perfection, and that's the reason for His astonishing LOVE for church that He has!

And thus a husband is to give himself to His wife to the same extent and way and to the same end. FURTHERMORE, ALL OF THAT IS JUST A SMALL PICTURE OF THE LOVE I AM COMMANDED TO HAVE FOR MY WIFE!!!!! I told you that husbands have the tough task!! So can you wives demand - or even suggest - that your husband should treat you this way? NO!! Treating you right is something between him and God. You have YOUR OWN TASK. You must get on with that. In the same way can we husbands demand - or even suggest - that our wives submit to us? NO!! You submitting to us is something between you and God. We have OUR OWN TASK. We must get on with that.

Of course it's not only fine but a good thing to talk together about these matters - but it takes TWO to discuss. If one is unwilling in any way, then stop right there, and simply pray for him or her. "I pray now for those who are having problems in their marriage, Lord. May each one of us be living in our marriage close - really close - to what YOU say! Please help us all to this end!"

- BM